too.
I hope these stories help you feel a little calmer. A little more hopeful. A little less alone.
I don’t know what type of person you are, or where you live, or what kind of profession you’ve chosen—puppeteer, astronaut, social justice warrior, or social media strategist—or what you’re trying to create, build, or achieve. But I do know this:
You are much stronger than you think. Your goals are worth pursuing. You are not alone. Everyone struggles, sometimes. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone feels the sting of rejection. Everyone gets scared. We can be scared, together, and…
We’re going to survive.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Survival Stories
This book contains true stories about terrible
bosses, unimpressed clients, vicious blog comments,
disappointing product sales, manuscript rejections,
embarrassing workplace mistakes, misery,
discouragement, defeat, and how to get through it.
You’ll find a few stories from my own life and career—
plus lots of stories contributed by friends and colleagues.
All of these stories are true. This stuff really happened.
All of these people survived. Each of these people offered
to share their story for one reason: because they want to
help you feel better.
(Isn’t it cool that there are people out there who care
about you, even though they’ve never met you? I think
that’s amazing.)
When You Don’t Get the Job That You Wanted
When Someone Writes a Terrible Review About Your Work
When Your Boss, Client, or Customer Is Totally Disappointed
When Bullies and Internet Goblins Are Ruining Your Life
When You Don’t Get the Job That You Wanted
MY BEST FRIEND GOT THE JOB—NOT ME.
Story contributed by: Ben Wendel.
Grammy Award-nominated musician. Composer. Producer.
A Note from Alexandra:
On a sticky-melty-hot summer day, I was driving past a Starbucks in Portland, Oregon. My phone flashed. Call from Ben Wendel. I pulled into the parking lot and miraculously found a spot. For the next hour or so, I sat in my car, furiously taking notes, while Ben told me how it felt to watch his best friend get the job that he wanted, and how that experience rattled his self-esteem to the core.
Ben would never say this himself, because he’s very humble, but I will tell you that he’s a musical genius who’s been nominated for a Grammy Award. He’s won about a million different prizes and grants. He’s been praised in The New York Times and lots of other publications. He plays numerous instruments. He’s immensely talented, hardworking, and respected by his peers. He’s performed with Snoop Dogg and The Artist Formerly Known As Prince, which is obviously the coolest thing ever.
In addition to being a world-renowned musician, composer, and producer, Ben also happens to be my older brother—and he’s one of my number one heroes. Ben has endured so much uncertainty, discouragement, and rejection in order to build a career as a full-time professional musician. He’s got serious grit.
I couldn’t imagine a better way to kick off this book than with a story from my big brother—the boy, then teenager, then man who taught me what it means to be a devoted, disciplined artist—and actually make a living doing what you love.
Without further ado…here is Ben’s story.
* * *
Ben: This one time, right after I graduated from college, my friend Shane and I both got invited to audition to tour with Ani DiFranco. She’s an incredible musician who has released more than twenty albums, and she’s considered one of the greatest folk-rock singers of her generation. My friend and I both came into the audition really prepared. We both sounded great. Then…Shane got the gig and I didn’t.
I remember getting the news over the phone. The tour manager called to let me know—and I felt completely crushed. It hit me in my core. I was happy for Shane—he was, and still is, one of my best friends—but I felt so disappointed. This would have
