Tell Me about
When Moms and
Dads Come Home
from Jail
Judi Goozh and Sue Jeweler
We dedicate this book to the children with an incarcerated parent and their families, who struggle each and every day, and to the professionals who are dedicated to helping them through difficult times.
We also dedicate this book to our families—our husbands, Paul and Larry, and our children and grandchildren.
Acknowledgments
Our journey on behalf of children with an incarcerated parent has been guided and supported by many. In 2007, our mentor, Art Wallenstein, who was the Director of Maryland’s Montgomery County Department of Correction and Rehabilitation, made it possible to create a project to raise awareness about this often-overlooked and underserved population. Robert Green, as warden of Maryland’s Montgomery County Clarksburg Facility (MCCF), offered great support as well. Kendra Jochum, LCSW-C Reentry Services Manager at MCCF, worked tirelessly and made incredible contributions to this effort. Randall Wylie provided the important photographs from MCCF that show the reality of jail so that children can see the real-life, real-world situation for a parent. From the beginning, Dr. Craig Uchida saw the importance of this issue and offered us tremendous support and continues his own work for children with an incarcerated parent. Jeff Franklin and Archie Coates, creators of PlayLab, Inc., have been with us every step of the way to give our writing an appropriate visual format. Cindy Perlis, Director of Art for Recovery for the UCSF Comprehensive Cancer Center at Mount Zion, gave us her creative insight and guidance on these books.
James Cherry, Editor at Jessica Kingsley Publishers, Ltd., gave us a fabulous home for our work. His enthusiastic support for this book has been an inspiration. His warmth and professionalism have been stellar and we thank him for the opportunity to highlight issues for children with an incarcerated parent. Editorial Assistant Daisy Watt has shown patience and support throughout the entire process of publication.
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To the Reader
This book will help you understand what is happening to your mom or dad who is working hard to come home after spending time in jail.
Tell Me about When Moms and Dads Come Home from Jail tells a story about a child like you who finds out that Dad is coming back home. You may have many questions about what will happen and, throughout the story, these questions are answered.
Moms come home from jail, too. Even though the story is about a child and a dad, the same story, questions, and answers are true for you when your mom comes home from jail.
You may have a lot of different feelings about the situation, from sadness, worry, and confusion to anger and not wanting to be with anyone. All your emotions are normal. Feelings are not right or wrong—they just are!
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Tell Me about When
Moms and Dads
Come Home from Jail
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When I came home from school, Mom was nervous and excited and said she had something to tell me.
She told me that Dad is coming home from jail. Dad has been in jail for a long time and I was a lot younger when he was last home. I miss him, but I am a little worried, and nervous, too. I wondered how we will get along. I wondered if he would be different. Would he still love me? A bunch of questions were swirling in my head.
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When can Dad come home? Mom said Dad has to work on a Reentry Plan. He works with a person to figure out what he will need and come up with ideas to help him when he finally comes home and goes back into the community. When Dad’s sentence is up, we can pick him up and bring him home. Some people can take a bus or taxi home.
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What do “parole” and “probation” mean? Mom said that when Dad follows all of the rules and his jail sentence is almost finished, he might come home and live with us. He may need to be on parole or probation. I was curious about what that meant.
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Mom said that parole is when a person like Dad is in jail; he can go back into the community but must continue serving his sentence under the supervision of a Parole and Probation Agent until the end of the sentence. Before he is released, he can earn “good days” and “work days,” which will reduce the amount of time of his sentence.
Mom said that part of Dad’s sentence might be probation, which would allow him to stay at home instead of going to jail. Dad could also get probation after his jail time. He will have to follow certain conditions and report to a Parole and Probation Agent, who might even visit him at our home.
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Is it easy to come home after being in jail? I am really excited about Dad coming home, but I am also not sure what it will be like and I am a little scared and stressed out. I have learned that what happened to Dad is not my fault. I asked Mom what she thought. She said that Dad has been away from us for such a long time that he would have a lot to do in jail to get ready to come home. She said we all will have to make some adjustments.
She told me she was scared and that Dad was probably scared, too. I really hadn’t thought about the way my parents might feel. She said it is okay to be worried and afraid, and that because we might all have these feelings it would be a good place to start to talk about it together. We could be each others’ support system. She also told me there were going to be good days and bad days for everyone.
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When Dad was in jail, he had job readiness classes to help him learn how to search for a job and do a job interview. If Dad had a drug problem he would work on a treatment program to get off drugs and stay clean from drugs when he got home. When Dad gets home, he will need
