attempt to stop him. She wanted this as much as he did, was his willing ally. Excruciating as it was for Victor to curtail their loving, he finally did so. He lifted his face from her breast, pulled down her sweater and wrapped the huge cape around her body. Then he enfolded her in his arms, protecting her with his parka. He stroked the crown of her head slowly, pressing her face against his chest, endeavouring to calm her. She cried suddenly, ‘Oh, Victor! Victor!’ and he heard the yearning, the disappointment echoing.
He said hoarsely, ‘I know, baby. I know. Later. I promise you, baby. All of me later.’
They stood clinging to each other until they had both regained a measure of composure. Eventually they drew apart and stared wonderingly into each other’s eyes. Victor’s heart clenched, and he experienced that same shock of recognition he had felt when first meeting her, and the elusive memory stirred again but evaporated before he could pinpoint it accurately. Her upturned face, still faintly glazed over with a residue of desire for him, was exquisite. He brought his hand up to touch her cheek, and his gaze was steadfast, their silent communication more explicit than words could ever be. Victor nodded his head slowly, but with great deliberation, as though confirming his recent promise to her, confirming the mutuality of their feelings. He brought her out of the stone gazebo without speaking.
Together they went down the hill, hand in hand, each shaken by the intensity of their desire for each other and by the fierce sexuality which had been aroused and unleashed between them. And they were a little benumbed as they headed back to the narrow path which plunged precariously through the pines to Wittingenhof and the estate far below on the plateau. Glancing up at the sky, Victor realized how long they had been on the mountain. The sun had long since set, the light was swiftly fading and there was a biting chill in the air. As they entered the forest, darker now than ever, he squeezed her hand reassuringly, and hurried her on, anxious to get her back to the warmth of the house. At one moment, he said, with a sheepish laugh, ‘My timing leaves a lot to be desired! I certainly picked one hell of a place to make love to you, didn’t I?’
Her laughter echoed his in the silent air. ‘Yes, you did. And that’s the perfect way for us both to catch our deaths.’
‘Ah, but watta way to go, kid.’
A mist had materialized and it was rolling down the mountainside to swirl around them as they pushed ahead. It was a light fog really, dank and cold and pervasive, and it was shrouding the forest with gossamer layers of pearl grey that obscured visibility. At Victor’s insistence, they increased their pace, were almost running as they took the last stretch of pathway through the wood. When they finally came out of the trees onto the flat ground, twilight was already descending, the sky drained of its icy blueness and darkening to sombre pewter. Still clasping hands, they continued to run across the long meadow to the Schloss, and its lights, twinkling brightly in the distance, were a welcome sight. ‘I think we just made it in time,’ Victor said, slowing to a trot. ‘I’d hate to get caught on that mountain when it’s really dark.’
‘It can be treacherous. And it’s very easy to get lost,’ Francesca told him as they went inside, crossed the hall and made their way down the stone stairs to the cloakroom on the lower floor. She hung up her Loden cape, and went on, ‘Diana’s always warned me about getting back before sunset. She’s probably quite worried by now. We’d better hurry, and go up for tea.’
‘Sure,’ Victor said, struggling out of his parka. He sat down, pulled off his heavy walking boots, and slipped into a pair of black suede loafers. He rose, looked at himself in the mirror, ran a comb through his hair and carefully straightened his black cashmere sweater. He swung around to face Francesca, and unaccountably he began to laugh.
She threw him a startled look. ‘What is it?’
Victor shook his head in a bemused way. ‘I was just thinking about all the time I’ve wasted with you. All the opportunities we’ve had these past weeks …’ He said no more, merely smiled lopsidedly. ‘I guess I’ve been kind of ambivalent about you.’
‘Why?’
‘The problems with Arlene, with my divorce. Worry about Confidential. Preoccupation with the picture. A decision not to get involved with anyone. But I suppose your age did have a lot to do with it.’
‘I’ll be twenty in May,’ she answered, her tone defensive.
‘And I’ll be forty in June,’ he said flatly, suddenly facing this reality. ‘I’m far too old for you, Francesca. Twenty years too old. Jesus, I was a married man when I was your age – before you were even born. The boys are older than you, for God’s sake. Listen, kid, I’ve lived a lifetime already. There’s nothing I haven’t seen, haven’t done, haven’t experienced. In fact, there’s nothing new to me on this earth. I’m pretty goddamn jaded, if you want the truth.’ He shook his head a trifle sadly, and his sigh was heavy. With a hint of regret, he finished, ‘I’m not being fair to you, Francesca. You ought to be with someone nearer your own age, not an old reprobate like me.’
‘What a stupid thing to say!’ she cried, and her concentrated stare was furious. Her expression changed, became grave, concerned, and a stricken look smudged out the light in her eyes. ‘Are you trying to tell me you’re sorry then? I mean sorry about what happened between us on the mountain?’
‘And that’s a particularly stupid question,’ he responded swiftly, reaching out for her. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her deeply, wanting to expunge the mingled hurt and panic on her face. A moment ago he had experienced a twinge of guilt about the disparity in their ages, and he had meant every word he said. But perhaps she was right, maybe age was irrelevant. Surely the way they felt was more important than anything else. He found himself whispering into her hair, ‘I’m not sorry about what we did, darling. But I am sorry we had to stop so abruptly.’
‘But you did say later,’ she whispered back, and blushed, surprised at herself.
He did not answer but increased the pressure of his arms around her, before sliding his strong hands over her shoulders and down her back onto her buttocks. He crushed her body into his, moving against her, welding her to him firmly, and finally he found her mouth with his own. His passion spiralled, made him reel. And then he groaned. His erection was enormous again. More inopportune timing, he thought, every part of him screaming for her. He murmured in the softest of voices, ‘I also said all of me. Do you want that, baby?’ He tipped her face up to his with one hand, and his expression was earnest and searching.
Francesca was mesmerized by those black eyes, his undisguised and compelling need. She was only too conscious of his sudden arousal and she shivered involuntarily. For a split second she was weak with her own longing, and her head swam.
‘Yes,’ she said firmly, without hesitation. ‘Yes, I do.’
Victor smiled his slow lazy smile, and he bent down and kissed her forehead with the utmost tenderness, and ran his finger along her cheek and onto her neck. It lingered there for a moment, and at last he said, ‘Then let’s go and find Diana, and get tea over with as quickly as possible. I can’t wait to get you alone. To myself. For myself. Capisce?’
‘Capish,’ she repeated softly. ‘What does that mean?’
‘It means understand. You do, don’t you, Francesca?’
She nodded, unable to speak.
‘Sorry we’re late, Diana,’ Francesca apologized as she and Victor went into the sitting room a few minutes later.
Diana was
