it. Cora had even agreed to come in when the shop was closed while Rule and Nash were at the gym so that I could keep it a surprise.
“I just want to make sure you’re doing it for you and not for Rule. What if you guys break up and the next guy you date is all straitlaced and proper? Pierced nipples might not work for your next boyfriend.”
I gave her a bored look and tried to calm my nerves. The truth was, doing it had nothing to do with Rule. I was back to feeling like I had no control over my life again. The thing with my car and the way Gabe was still influencing my day-to-day life, the pressure from my parents about everything from my hair to Rule, the way Rule disappeared inside himself when I started to get too close—it was all closing in on me and I needed something that was just for me. I wanted this little something that was my choice, a decision to alter my body that no one else had any say in. I was having migraines more frequently, three in the last two weeks, and if I didn’t do something I was going to shatter apart into too many pieces to put back together.
“If Rule and I break up, you really think the next guy in my life is going to be all clean-cut and preppy?”
“I don’t see why not. You dated Gabe for six months and he’s about as opposite from Rule as one can get. I bet pierced nipples would send him into cardiac arrest.”
“I’m never dating anyone just because I’m supposed to again, and I’m not planning on dating anyone besides Rule for the foreseeable future anyway, so let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”
The truth was things had been strained between Rule and me for the last week. I didn’t know what it was but he was treating me like I was spun sugar and going to break apart at any moment. When he didn’t think I was paying attention I would catch him staring at me with a confused look in his eyes, like he was trying to figure out what I was still doing there, or why he was still around. He was obsessively concerned about my safety and made sure I was never alone. We still spent every night together at alternating homes, and the time we spent in bed had morphed from passionate and out of control, to tender and fleeting. While it was nice, it didn’t feel like him and it was starting to really concern me. I didn’t know how to address it because it wasn’t like there was anything actually wrong. He was still emotionally present, still attentive and clearly willing to try like I’d asked him, but something was off. I just couldn’t put my finger on what it was.
“If your father finds out, he really will make good on pulling his tuition check for next year.”
My dad had finally gotten tired of me ignoring his calls and had ambushed me at the apartment last weekend. I had tried to explain the situation with the car, tried to make him understand about Gabe and his threats, but none of it did any good. All my dad was concerned about was how things looked for him and Mom. The requisite threat about tuition had been leveled, but it held no weight with me. I told him if he pulled my tuition I would gladly get a job as a stripper to pay my way through med school, and he hadn’t liked it one bit. I knew the threat would only keep him off my case briefly, but for now that was all I needed if he wasn’t going to have my back against what was going on with Gabe.
I hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Gabe, but I don’t think Rule pushing him around had really sent him to ground. Ayden mentioned she had heard some girls in one of her classes talking about me, and from the sounds of it, his new mission was to trash my reputation on campus with a series of foul lies and outrageous stories. Luckily, I was pretty immune to hearing awful stuff about myself from growing up in such a judgmental and hateful household. Otherwise I would have been freaking out even more and contemplating changing schools just to get away from it all.
“Yeah, he would. Good thing that’s not something he ever has any opportunity to see.”
Cora opened the door with a little metal tray in her hand that looked sterilized and smelled like hospital-grade antiseptic.
“You ready?”
I swung my legs up and around so I was lying back in the chair and tried to control my rapid breathing.
“As I’ll ever be.”
“I’m fast, so it’ll be over quick. Just remember you have to keep them clean so for the first three to four weeks don’t play with them or let you-know-who play with them. He should know the rules by now.”
I laughed as she told me to strip out of my tight V-neck henley and bra. I shivered involuntarily at being so exposed but Cora was reassuring, and even though I knew she was uncomfortable, Ayden held my hand and watched what was happening with rapt attention.
“First, I gotta mark you to make sure they’re even and straight on both sides.” It was weird to have someone, even though that someone was a friend, handle my body in such a way. The tip of the marker was cold and it made me shiver but not nearly as much as when she put the metal clamp on the first light-pink tip. Her two-toned eyes stared into mine and I felt my nails dig into Ayden’s palm. “Okay, babe, take a really deep breath and when I tell you, let it out slow and even. You’re going to feel a lot of pressure from the needle pressing through and then the jewelry being put in place. Just keep your eyes on me and keep breathing.”
I did what she said and after the initial pain, which admittedly had a couple of surprised tears welling in my eyes, it was more uncomfortable than painful. She repeated the process on the other side and then it was over and I was pierced. She asked me if I wanted a mirror. I took it and admired her handiwork.
I had pretty nice breasts already; they weren’t huge or anything outrageous, but they were firm and high and my nipples were always a nice, pretty pink. The silver hoops were similar to the ones in Rule’s eyebrow and the one in his lip, but the ball at the center of mine was a bright aquamarine globe. They were sexy and feminine and I freaking loved the way it looked. I took the aftercare instructions and climbed back into my clothes. I felt the little piece of me that had been flailing over the last weeks lock back down, and I smiled at Cora and gave her a hug.
“I love it.”
“You should. It’s over-the-top hot.”
Ayden nodded as she pulled on her coat. “I didn’t think it would suit you, but I was wrong. They look really girly and sexy. I can see now why you wanted to get it done.”
Cora lifted her superblond eyebrows as I shoved money into her hands. “I know you said you would do it for free but I want to pay you.”
She shook her head and tried to hand it back but I refused to take it. “I consider us friends now and I don’t take advantage of friends, so please just take it.”
She frowned at me and moved around to pick up all her equipment. “If you wanted a tattoo and Rule or Nash offered to do it for free, would you let them?”
“Rule yes, Nash no.”
She sighed in defeat then. “Well, fine then. Let me know what loverboy thinks, not that I think he’ll be able to hide his shit-eating grin. I swear his mood entirely revolves around how the two of you are going at it.”
I pulled my long hair out of the collar of my coat and tried not to wince as the movement caused my new additions to move uncomfortably against my bra. “So, how’s he been lately?” I really wanted to know.
“Fine, more mellow and maybe more quiet than usual, but good.”
“Well, that’s good, I guess.”
“You don’t sound so sure about that.”
