old friends, family members and strangers reclaim their personal greatness and live far happier, healthier and fulfilling lives. The reporter wrote that Julian’s work was creating an enormous buzz and that many people across the country were starting to put together expeditions to seek him out. Julian had become a folk hero of sorts and a mystique had begun to arise around him. But Julian was remarkably elusive: no person who had actively searched for Julian had been able to find him. Julian had not been interviewed in the story, but many had started calling him “The Reluctant Guru.” The tale of Julian’s life would have made for a fabulous movie in this age when so many of us are so spiritually starved.
“Are you really Julian Mantle?” I asked, still not quite believing. “Why did you come looking for me? My dad used to tell me about you. He was one of your colleagues, you know.”
“I know exactly who your father is,” came the gentle reply. “He was a friend of mine, and I value my friendships enormously. Your dad told me a lot about you, and I heard about what happened to your family life recently. I’ve come to be of service. Servant leaders are the most powerful of all, you know.”
“Never knew that,” I responded.
“Things are never as bad as they seem. The situations that cause us sorrow are the same ones that introduce us to the strength, power and wisdom that we truly are.”
He continued. “I know things have been extremely difficult for you, Dar. I am very sensitive to what you are going through and I would never minimize your feelings. Feelings are the doorways into your soul and they must be acknowledged and then felt to completion. Feelings carry important information and serve to foster your self-relationship if explored fully. To deny them is to deny a natural part of you. To pretend you are not feeling what you are feeling would be a very unhealthy thing to do, both psychologically and physiologically. Swallowing your feelings leads to disease. But there is a much bigger picture at play, one that you cannot comprehend with your current perception. Remember, we see the world not as it is but as we are. As you change, the way you see the world changes. As your awareness expands, you will become aware of things you previously could neither see nor understand. All is good here. All that has unfolded for you is leading you to a fantastic place. As human beings, our tendency is to tell life to listen to what we want. But life doesn’t work that way. It gives us what we need, what is best for us—what is in our highest interests. Your life will work much better once you begin to listen to life. Let it lead you rather than trying to push the river. And trust that where life carries you is exactly where you are meant to be. Let go of all your resistance and move into a posture of surrendering to whatever is unfolding. Doing so is one of the ways you will ensure that you will walk the path of your destiny, your true path.”
“I read a story about you in the paper a little while ago,” I said. “It’s incredible what you’re doing to help make the world a better place.”
“Yes, I read that article,” Julian replied with a grin. “I actually have it with me somewhere. I am an idealist and it makes me feel so happy when I read that piece because I am reminded that I am making a difference. I measure my life not by decades but by deeds. I’ve learned that lasting happiness comes by giving, not getting. The Chinese say it so well: ‘A little fragrance always clings to the hand that gives roses.’ And yet we all too often forget that. In business, for example, we fail to act in win-win ways. We buy into the false assumption that someone has to lose for us to win. We guard our territories and refuse to operate from a frame of reference that sees the value in helping all those around us succeed. There’s no truth in that. As a matter of fact, the best way to lead the field in business is to devote yourself to adding more value to your clients and customers than they have any right to expect. The true leaders in business understand who puts food on their tables and, therefore, treat their customers like royalty. They serve, cherish and love their customers. Love is an incredibly powerful business tool, you know?”
“I’ve never thought of it that way.”
“Well, it’s true, my friend. And before anyone will lend you a hand, you must touch their heart. Be like the sun: the sun gives all it can give. But in return, all of the flowers, the trees and the plants grow towards it. In your business life alone, by dedicating yourself to delighting and loving your clients, you will create an army of goodwill ambassadors who will run out into the world and tell everyone they know about what you do and who you are. Even when it comes to your so-called competition, try to do whatever you can to help them. Forge alliances with them. Develop friendships with them. Business is all about relationships. Help them get what they want and the ancient law of reciprocity will kick in—they’ll begin to help you get what you want. Giving begins the receiving process.”
“Very nice point,” I agreed, sensing the power of this man’s words.
“So, as I say, the bit about the difference I’m making in that article makes me feel good about myself since it reminds me I’m blessing lives, in my own small way. But I don’t take all the recognition I’m getting too seriously. No one takes you seriously when you take yourself too seriously, you know.”
I smiled on hearing that line. This guy was good.
“I can’t believe they’re calling me a sage,” he continued, lifting a speck of banana off his pristine robe. “What do I know about that kind of thing? I’m just an ordinary man who has, with the help of some very powerful teachers, discovered a philosophy that will lead anyone who chooses to adopt it to a beautiful life. Every human being needs to carve out the time to articulate a philosophy for his or her life—it’s one of the most important things a person can do. Every person, to live truly and greatly, must define how he wants to live and what his brightest life will look like. We all need to have a statement on a piece of paper that we can revisit every morning while the rest of the world is asleep that will serve as a moral compass to direct the choices of our day. This will serve as an anchor to lock us into our best moves. Without such a statement of philosophy, you will live your life by accident, reacting to whatever pops up within your days. Living like that is a recipe for disaster—you’re just begging for trouble when you live like that. Makes me think of a saying: ‘If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.’”
“So I need to take some time to think about what I want my life to stand for?”
“Absolutely, Dar. This is one of the musts of life. Successful and fulfilled people make the time to think, plan and reflect. They are awake to their lives because they know that each day is an incredibly precious gift. If you don’t believe that, walk into a hospital on the way home and talk to someone in the cancer ward. Ask them what they would give for an extra day of life.”
What Julian said shot through me. I had taken so much of life for granted. I had never viewed each day above ground as a gift and an opportunity to create something great or make a difference.
“Most people spend more time planning their summer vacations than they do planning their lives. What a shame. Be thoughtful about your life. Ask yourself: ‘How am I meant to live?’ Question what you are meant to do, what things you will no longer tolerate in your life and what standards of excellence you will hold yourself to, on a go-forward basis. Living life without a devotion to excellence dishonors the priceless gifts and talents that have been given to you.”
Julian continued, taking a few steps as he spoke and raising his hands into the air for effect. “Without a philosophy that reflects your truth in terms of how you want to live and what you aim to be, how can you make choices that are right for you? Without a philosophy, you will live your life according to other people’s wishes. You’ll be like those lemmings, following the crowd as they walk off the cliff to their deaths. Without a philosophy, you just might find yourself on your deathbed and wonder ‘what
