with Pamela, and that both of them have continued to help their children (who are now adults). I also hope that, by now, more than likely, he has had fruitful findings in his research towards lessening suffering on earth.
In most cases the contact isn’t so obvious as it was in that one, in which I felt privileged to have been a link. One of my reasons for telling the story is that I believe that the contact is always there, and the people concerned can become more aware of it as they open themselves to its possibility and – I’m convinced – its certainty.
Grief has many guises
Of course, physical death is not the only – or even the most devastating – cause of grief. I have met many people who were grieving over a multiplicity of things, such as problems within families, broken relationships (particularly where long-standing friendships were involved), unhappiness in work situations, and unrequited love. Sometimes it became possible for people to see that what they felt were sources of grief could be transformed into valid reasons for rejoicing.
There was, however, one case where I had to admit to utter failure. A young woman called Sally was totally infatuated – she called it in love – with a well-known pop star. She had never met him. Sally was convinced that he shared her passionate love, although she didn’t have any evidence to support her conviction. What she wanted me to tell her was that they were going to live happily ever after in blissful togetherness. No matter how much I tried to shift her on to other aspects of her life, I couldn’t divert her from her obsession and, of course, I couldn’t tell her what she wanted to hear. After about three hours, in a state of complete exhaustion, I managed to bring the meeting to an end.
My reason for mentioning this case is that, in my experience, obsessions (often of a totally irrational kind) are a major cause of grief. I think all humans suffer from them to some degree. The possibilities for developing obsessions are wide-ranging; for example, sport, sex, drugs, religious fanaticism, controlling tendencies, gambling, alcohol, judgementalism, possessiveness, making money, careers, perceptions of success or failure, and so on and on.
I suggest that it might be an interesting exercise for people to consider to what extent, if any, they suffer from obsessiveness. Any form of it is a barrier to freedom of thought. As human beings, it’s unlikely that we’ll be able to free ourselves from all forms of it but, if we can become aware of an area or areas where we’re inclined to immerse ourselves in it, that awareness can help us to regard it as part of our human foibles. In that way it can help us to experience freedom in our thought processes.
No matter where we go in our exploration of life in the physical and non-physical dimensions, we’re inevitably brought back to the need for open-mindedness.
The role of religion
In resuming discussion with Margaret Anna, I couldn’t resist commenting that, when we look at the whole area of death and the grief that accrues from it, I think it’s fair to say that religions – at least Christian religions – haven’t been very helpful. As far as I know, they would still be dismissive of the possibility – not to mention the desirability – of the sort of continuing contact that we were discussing. Indeed, any idea of the validity of Margaret Anna communicating with me would surely be seen as a projection of my crazed imagination.
Margaret Anna said, ‘Still, religions do provide comfort for many people. And, of course, it’s central to religious teaching that life continues after death. Even the notion of eternal damnation in Hell can be put into the context of tormented states of mind, as we saw in the case of Alfredo; in such a state, a moment is an eternity.
‘Fear and obedience to authority were very much the base of religious tradition, as perceived by many of its adherents. But that’s changing. Except where extreme fundamentalism is concerned, a positive approach tends to be emphasised rather than a negative one; in other words, compassion, tolerance and love, rather than fear.
‘All the same, I’d say that you’d be on to a good thing if you were to bet against our communications being received with open arms – not to mention open minds – by religious orthodoxy. What’s new?’
There’s always hope.
Chapter 12
Exploring Our Communication with Guides
Now that Margaret Anna has provided extensive illustration of what life is like in spirit, I feel that it’s a timely opportunity for me to explore further the whole area of communication with guides. Much of this has been conveyed to me by my spirit guides, and through my own experience over many years of working with them in my own life, in individual consultations with people and in running workshops. I cannot, however, fully discuss the role that guides play in our lives without considering where ‘free will’ fits into the equation.
By the way, in what I’m writing I hope I don’t sound dogmatic. It would be tedious if I had to preface everything with statements such as ‘my understanding is’, or words to that effect, so I’m going to use a direct style. You will realise by now that when I make statements about life in spirit they come from information I have been given by my guides.
All souls have free will, and can choose whether they wish to incarnate or reincarnate in physical bodies. As we are all part of God/unconditional love, there can be no conditions attached to how we use our free will. (There are, of course, ultimately self-imposed consequences, as Margaret Anna has illustrated in the stories about Johann and Alfredo.) It’s open to us to choose whether we want guides to help us during our lives on earth. Those guides are evolved souls who are familiar with conditions on earth and who have already learned the lessons it has to offer.
As I thought about it, it seemed perfectly natural and logical that it should be so. In the physical world the vast majority of people are willing to help each other when they’re aware of a need to do so. I know that’s not the impression we may get from reading newspapers, or listening to radio or television news items. Stories about man’s inhumanity to man are, perhaps understandably, perceived to be more newsworthy than those depicting tolerance and love. It’s the former that come to our attention most frequently – and persistently. That has its own merits, in that cruelties, etc., are highlighted; however, it presents an unbalanced view, in a negatively slanted way, of how things are.
Certainly, in my now lengthy experience, I have rarely met an unkind or unhelpful person. As an aside, I considered making an exception of a teacher in a primary school that I had to attend for a couple of years when I was about six or seven years old. She used the leg of a chair to inflict punishment. Even when I knew the answers I was unable to verbalise them; apart from my nervousness, I knew from experience that being right was no guarantee of escaping her wrath. A sure sign of what was to come was when her false teeth began to clack and the top teeth dropped onto the bottom ones. However, in the mellowness of my advanced years, I can say that outside of school she was regarded as a hearty, friendly person, and she probably saw herself as having the best interests of her pupils at heart. So I won’t make an exception of her, tempting as it is!
Things have changed considerably, even in the space of my lifetime. For example, the approach to teaching personified by the chair-woman would now be inconceivable. As people grow in awareness they automatically want to make the world a better and happier place for everybody. If that happens within the restrictive framework of the physical world, it surely stands to reason that as souls move into higher vibrations they are even more inclined to help those of us who are still struggling with the human dimension.
Getting to know the guides
When I began to ask my guides for help, at the outset of my communication with them, I was concerned that I’d be letting myself in for a lot of pain and suffering.
