Vera gave her a brief hug. ‘Oh law', I forget sometimes about you and Josie losing your mas.’ She wrinkled her pert nose. ‘You must miss her, Connie.’
‘I do,’ Connie admitted truthfully, sadness clouding her expression. ‘Nothing was the same after she died.’
Vera gave her a sympathetic look. ‘My mam and dad might have their barneys, but me mam can wind me dad round her little finger. When I get married it’s going to be to someone as does as I tell him!’ Vera announced firmly. ‘And he won’t be some jumped-up Johnny either, nor one who tries to take too many favours, if you know what I mean. I know me worth and any lad who walks out with me is going to know it as well.’
Her words touched a place inside Connie that hurt, and made her feel not just afraid, but also as though she and Vera stood on different sides of a hidden divide.
Once she had been like Vera, happily confident about her own future and the man who would share it – a man who would love her as her father had loved her mother. The reality of her relationship with Kieron had been bitterly painful, but of course she could never admit to the knowledge she had gained or how she had gained it.
‘Oh, look at that pretty crêpe-de-Chine blouse, Connie,’ Vera demanded, losing interest in the subject of men. Dutifully Connie gave her attention to the window display Vera was admiring. ‘It would go a treat with my new twill skirt. It’s a bit pricey though.’ Vera heaved a big sigh, ‘I think I’ll go in mind, and ask them to put the blouse to one side. I’ve got a birthday coming up and me mam and dad can get it for me.
A little enviously, Connie followed her friend into the shop. A brand new crêpe-de-Chine blouse was a luxury she could not afford.
‘There, I ll telephone me mam and tell her that me birthday present is all sorted out for her, Vera announced triumphantly as they left the shop, the blouse having been put to one side after the payment of a small holding deposit.
‘We’re going to be late for the dance,’ Connie warned Vera.
‘Oh, we’ll get there in time if we hurry, and if we do miss anything it will only be the supper, that’s all. I can’t wait to see that George Lashwood again. I’ve never seen anyone so handsome or so smart. When he was singing, my heart fair turned over inside me chest,’ Vera sighed.
Because of the popularity of the weekly dance, the entrance to the dance hall was thronged with people, and once they had bought their tickets, Vera and Connie had to squeeze past a group of young men in obvious high spirits, laughing and telling one another jokes.
‘By, but me throat’s dry. I wish we’d thought to get ourselves a glass of porter.’ Vera told Connie, nudging her as one of the young men winked broadly at them, and swept them a bow.
‘Looking for a seat, ladies?’ he invited, indicating the seat from which he had just removed his own hat.
‘We want a seat where we can see the dance floor,’ Vera told him chirpily, whilst one of his companions gave them a bold stare and exclaimed, ‘You two are a pretty pair, and no mistake.’
Vera stuck her nose up in the air and pretended to be offended, but Connie noticed that she didn’t seem to be in any hurry to walk away.
‘Not walking out with anyone then, or meeting up with someone here?’
The question was directed at both of them, but it was Vera who answered it, tossing her head and saying, coquettishly, ‘And what business of yours might that be then?’
‘Just the business of a normal red-blooded man who’s seen a real beauty of a girl,’ he quipped back. ‘Two right beauties they are, eh, Charlie?’ he added, nudging his friend in the ribs and winking.
‘Well, for your information, we’ve come here to listen to Mr George Lashwood singing, and not to listen to no impertinence from the likes of you!’ Vera told him firmly.
But she was still lingering near to their table, and when one of them asked if she would like a glass of porter, she pretended to hesitate and then announced, ‘Well, I’m not bothered for mesel', but Connie, me friend here, said just as we came in that she was sorry we hadn’t got ourselves a glass and a bit o’ sommat to eat.’
‘Vera, I said no such thing.’ Connie objected, adding determinedly, ‘We’d better go and find some-where to sit.’ She turned and started to walk away leaving Vera with no option other than to follow her.
She didn’t want to encourage the young men’s overtures. In fact, she didn’t want anything to do with them. After all, she had already learned the hard way what happened to girls who gave their love too easily. It would be a long time, if ever, before she ever trusted a man again.
As soon as she had caught up with Connie, Vera demanded crossly, ‘Why did you have to go and do that? I was enjoying m’self.’
Connie made no response, knowing there was no way she could explain how she felt to Vera, or why!
‘Connie, I thought we was coming out for a good time and now that’s the third time you’ve refused to stand up with someone!’ Vera objected, when Connie shook her head obstinately at the young man who had just asked her to dance.
‘My feet are killing me,’ Connie fibbed. ‘But don’t let me stop you, Vera.’
Vera pouted and protested, ‘It’s not the same if you’re going to sit here being miserable all night.’
The truth was, Connie admitted inwardly, that she had agreed to come, more out of a stubborn determination not to let Mavis tell her what to do, than anything else.
‘It’s a good job that Josie and Miss Goody Two Shoes didn’t come with us, mind. Josie would have gone as red as fire every time a lad came anywhere near us, and Mavis would have stuck her nose up in the air.’
‘Mavis enjoyed the comedian the last time we went out,’ Connie felt obliged to point out. ‘It would have been more fun, too, if all of us were here!’
‘It u’d be more fun if you’d give some of these lads a chance and have a dance wi’ one or two of them,’ Vera told her forthrightly.
‘If you want to dance, then don’t let me stop you.’ Connie told her again, but she herself wasn’t prepared to give in to the blandishments of the young men who tried to coax her onto the floor. Logically, she knew that all men weren’t tarred with the same brush as Kieron, but somehow she just couldn’t stop herself from being suspicious and wary. The miscarriage she had suffered might, in some ways, have been a blessing, but, in others, it had left her shocked and afraid, and she knew it would cast a shadow over her life that would last for ever. No woman could go through the pain and humiliation she had suffered and not be marked by it.
The evening was over and the dance hall was starting to empty. Tiredly, Connie linked up with Vera whilst they made their way outside, and then fought their way through the crush to their bus stop. Connie rubbed her stomach as it gave a hungry rumble.
‘I’m starving,’ she complained as they climbed on the waiting bus.
‘Well, whose fault’s that?’ Vera challenged her. ‘If we’d stayed with them lads as first showed an interest in us, like as not they would have treated us to a bit of sommat to eat.’
‘Yes,
