mother followed her, then came to a stop in the middle of the kitchen. Her arms were folded tightly across her chest and her mouth was pinched.
“Did you come here to mock my poverty?”
Aurelia raised her eyebrows. “There you go again. Mom, have you ever thought of writing fiction? You’d be so good at it. Maybe short stories, you know, for those women’s magazines?”
“I don’t appreciate you making fun of me.”
“I’m not,” Aurelia said gently. “I wanted to check on you and make sure everything was all right. I’m sorry you don’t feel comfortable calling me. I hope that will change.”
“It will change when you stop acting so selfishly. Until then, I want nothing to do with you.”
There it was. The gauntlet. In the past, Aurelia had always given in. The thought of being abandoned by her mother had crushed the little spirit she had left. But today was different. Sure, she felt like throwing up, but that would pass. She meant what she’d said before. She was happy to help in an emergency, but she was done being a financial and emotional convenience.
She’d had plenty of time to think about her actions. Stephen had respected her wishes. She hadn’t heard from him once. Why did her mother find it so easy to ignore her while Stephen found it so easy to do exactly what she asked? A dilemma for another time, she told herself.
“I hope you have fun tonight with your friends,” she said quietly. “It was nice to see you, Mom.” She turned to leave.
Her mother caught up with her in the hallway. “You’re leaving? Just like that?”
“You said you didn’t want to have anything to do with me unless I went back to the way I was. I can’t do that. I’m sorry if you think that makes me selfish. I don’t think it does.”
“I’m your mother. I should come first in your life.”
Aurelia shook her head. “No, Mom. I need to come first in my own life. I need to take care of myself.”
Her mother put her hands on her hips. “I see. Selfish to the end. I know what you’re saying to yourself. When in doubt, blame the mother. I suppose this is all my fault.”
“I didn’t say that and I’m not thinking that. But if you’re first in your life and you’re first in my life, where does that leave me?”
She didn’t expect an answer, but she waited for a few seconds anyway. It seemed polite. Her mother opened her mouth and closed it.
“I’ll talk to you soon,” Aurelia said, then left.
On the walk home, she replayed the conversation in her head. For once, she was happy with what she’d said. She might not be where she needed to be, but she was making progress.
She found herself wanting to call Stephen and tell him what had happened. Only she couldn’t. They were seeing each other on the show and nowhere else. She knew she’d made the right decision, but that didn’t make the loneliness any easier to bear.
DAKOTA WRAPPED the towel around Hannah. Her daughter was warm and rosy after her bath. Denise stood at the end of the changing table and gently tickled her granddaughter’s toes.
“Who’s a beautiful baby girl?” Denise asked in a singsong voice. “Who’s special?”
Hannah waved her fingers in the air and laughed.
“She’s feeling much better,” Dakota said. Knowing her daughter was healing was such a relief. Getting used to dealing with a baby was hard enough, but when that baby was sick, it was a nightmare.
She and Hannah had been together nearly a week now. They’d established something of a routine. The follow-up visit to the pediatrician had been much better than that first encounter. The doctor had said Hannah was doing well. Her weight was up, and her ears were clear. Hannah had to finish the course of antibiotics and there was still teething to get through, but all that was doable.
“She’s eating well,” Denise said. “I can tell she’s feeling better. Do you have her on the new formula?”
“Yes. We were lucky. Her tummy handled the change well. The doctor said to start her on solid food in another week, which is a whole week sooner than we expected. That will help her gain more weight and catch up with her age group.”
She finished drying the little girl, then put a new diaper on her and slipped her into her pajamas. By then, her daughter was half asleep. Her eyes sunk closed and her body relaxed.
“Go ahead,” she told her mother. “You put her to bed.”
Denise smiled at her. “Thanks,” she whispered, and picked up the baby.
Hannah snuggled close. Denise crossed the room and settled the little girl on her back in the crib. After starting the mobile, they dimmed the lights and stepped out of the room.
“I’m so lucky with her,” Dakota said, as she adjusted the volume on the baby monitor. “Hannah enjoys being with people. I’ve heard that some of the children from orphanages are cautious around anyone new. In this town, that would be a problem.”
They settled on the sofa. Her mother looked at her.
“You’re doing well,” her mother told her. “I know you’re terrified half the time, but it doesn’t show. Soon you’ll be terrified only a quarter of the time, which is something to look forward to.”
“Thanks,” Dakota said. “You’re right. I am scared. It’s getting a little better. Knowing that she’s healing helps a lot. As does all the company. Ethan and Liz stopped by a couple of days ago and I’m getting lots of visits at work.” She smiled at her mother. “You’re helping a lot, too.”
“I love having her here. Finally a grandchild who lives close to me. You’ll have to tell me if I become one of those annoying, interfering grandparents. I’m not saying I’ll change my behavior, but I will at least feel guilty about it.”
Dakota laughed. “As long as you feel guilty, then I guess it’s okay.”
“So you’re handling the stress? You’re sleeping?” her mother asked.
“Better than I was.” Finn had stayed with her the first couple of nights. Just having him around had made everything better. But she’d realized that at some point she had to face motherhood on her own. She hadn’t slept at all the first night he’d been gone, but since then she’d been sleeping more and more.
“Sometimes I freak out for no reason,” she admitted. “Does that get better?”
“Yes and no,” her mother said. “You freak out less and then they become teenagers. That’s when the real nightmare begins.” Denise smiled brightly. “But that’s some time away. Enjoy Hannah while she’s still young and rational.”
“We weren’t that bad,” Dakota told her.
“You didn’t have to be that bad. There were six of you.”
“I guess you have a point there.”
