at this moment …
If he was single, then what if he’d be interested in her? Even if for a short while, even if he later told her that she didn’t measure up when compared to Cassidy, she wanted that shot.
Question was, what was she willing to do, to risk, to make that shot happen?
Had he been too harsh with Cassidy? Eli hoped not. He didn’t want to be unkind to her. At the same time, they needed to start having more space between them. Perhaps that was wrong as last night she’d sent him sext messages and he’d briefly considered sending her one back. Much better to cut the ties for a while. She’d just claimed to have been drunk the night before, but Cassidy never drank more than a single glass of wine. Had she just been embarrassed that he’d not returned her message? If only she knew the truth.
Regardless, they were meant to be friends, not lovers. To pretend otherwise for a single second longer would be cruel to a woman he liked and respected. That was what made this all so difficult. He didn’t want to lose Cassidy’s friendship.
Ending their relationship had meant more than admitting there was something wrong with him that he couldn’t commit to spending the rest of his life with such an amazing woman, but it also meant damaging his relationship with his best friend.
“What’s up with you and Wonder Woman?” Dr. Andrew Morgan said as he joined Eli.
Eli took a deep breath, then exhaled. He preferred his personal business to be private, but he supposed it was unrealistic that his colleagues wouldn’t question what had happened. “You mean Cassidy.”
He supposed she was a wonder woman of sorts. There was little she couldn’t do and do well. She was a great catch. He was the fool who couldn’t take that next step with her because he wanted more. More of what he wasn’t sure, but if Cassidy had been his soul mate surely he wouldn’t have found himself backtracking when she’d hinted she wanted a ring.
“Yes, I mean Cassidy,” Andrew said, as if Eli wasn’t in his right mind or he’d have known exactly to whom he referred. “You two having an argument?”
He shook his head. “We decided to go our separate ways.”
“She dump you?”
Eli struggled with how to answer. He didn’t want to say anything that might hurt Cassidy.
“We’ve decided to just be friends.”
“How could you possibly just be friends with a woman like Cassidy?”
Eli looked a little closer at his colleague, noting the heightened color in the man’s cheeks, the rapid pulse at his throat, and the strong set to his jaw. Interesting.
“Because that’s how we feel about each other. Friendly. It’s all we should have ever been.” Even as he said the words out loud, the truth echoed through him.
“Sure took you long enough to figure that out.”
“Tell me about it,” Eli snorted, wondering why it had taken so long. “Then again, like you said, Cassidy is a wonderful woman.” His family had loved her. His mother had repeatedly told him how Cassidy was everything she’d ever hoped for in a daughter-in-law. To say she’d been disappointed at his news was the understatement of the year. “A man hesitates to let her go even when he knows it isn’t going to happen between them.”
Andrew nodded as if he understood, but Eli could tell he obviously didn’t. His mother hadn’t either. For that matter, he himself didn’t understand why he hadn’t been content with Cassidy.
“You should ask her out.” Andrew obviously felt a passion for her that Eli couldn’t, no matter how much he’d wanted to.
Andrew’s eyes widened, then he glanced away rapidly. “I couldn’t.”
“Why not? She’s single. You’re single. Go for it.”
The man regarded him suspiciously. “You really wouldn’t care?”
Eli shook his head. “I’d be happy for you if things worked out. She’s a great woman and deserves a man to treat her so. I plan to date and imagine she will too. Ask her.”
Andrew toyed with his fork. “Maybe I will.”
It struck Eli that he should feel remorse or jealousy or some sense of loss that a woman he’d invested years with might be moving on with another man, perhaps this man. He didn’t feel any of those things. Just relief that he was no longer tied to Cassidy, which again made him wonder if something was wrong with him, if he’d set his expectations so high that even a woman who was perfect for him on paper couldn’t meet them.
“You should,” he repeated. “A woman like her isn’t likely to stay single long.”
The flash of panic in Andrew’s eyes said it all. He had a thing for Cassidy, but had obviously held it at bay in respect for her relationship with Eli.
That was when Emily Jacobs caught Eli’s eye.
Emily Jacobs. As in the person his texter had thought he was the night before. Was the woman sitting across the cafeteria table from her his mysterious texter?
Dark hair, light colored eyes, although he couldn’t make out their exact blue-green color, creamy complexion with a spattering of freckles across her face. Naturally pretty. Somewhat familiar.
She worked in ICU. He recalled seeing her there, although usually only glimpses here and there. Odd really when he thought about it. He was in the ICU a lot. How come his path rarely crossed this woman’s—Beth something—in the ICU?
Unless she purposely avoided him.
Why would she do that?
Unless she was the texter and because of her attraction to him she’d purposely steered clear.
It was a possibility. One he wanted to put to the test.
“Excuse me,” he said to the man lost in his thoughts sitting across from him, and pulled out his cellular phone. He opened his text messages from the night before and glanced at the number. Was it hers? Beth’s from ICU? Logic said it was, but he wanted proof, to know for sure. He hit the telephone icon button that would dial her number and watched her closely.
When she set her fork down on her plate and reached into her scrub pocket to pull out her phone, answering without looking at the number, Eli smiled.
Bingo.
His smile widened. Although he didn’t quite understand, an excitement filled him that he hadn’t felt in years … maybe ever.
Maybe he wasn’t ready to settle down with Cassidy, maybe there was something wrong with him that was holding him back, but at the moment, he wasn’t going to worry about those things. For now he was going to quit stressing about the future and his expectations, his parents’ expectations, the fact he’d chosen to become single rather than marry the “perfect” woman. He was going to enjoy life, to have fun, and not take everything so seriously. Something he’d just realized that he’d forgotten to do over the past few years.
“Hello?” Beth answered, expecting to hear her nurse supervisor’s voice
