herself had wondered more than once if Anthony was worth all this agonising over. He was attractive enough in a fair-haired, typically English way—certainly better-looking than either of his sisters, she allowed judiciously—but she’d always found him humourless, and suspected as well that he might share his father’s notoriously roving eye.
But Susan clearly regarded her engagement as a major victory, Carly thought wryly, as she went up the second flight of stairs to the old nursery quarters. So, heaven forbid that she should be a dissenting voice amid the jubilation.
Not that Sue would listen if I was, she thought with a sigh, as she opened the nursery door.
It was hardly recognisable as the room she and her sister had once shared. All the old furniture had gone, and so had the toys—the doll’s house, the rocking-horse, and the farmyard animals. It was now, very obviously, a very spare bedroom, she thought, dumping her case down on the narrow single bed, furnished with unwanted odds and ends from the rest of the house. Only the white-painted bars across the windows revealed its original purpose.
She opened her case and put the few items it contained into the chest of drawers.
The photograph, as always, was at the bottom of the case. She extracted it, and placed it carefully on the dressing-chest next to the mirror.
She stood for a long moment, staring at it. The child’s face looked back at her, its eager brightness diminished by the heavy glasses, and the protruding front teeth that the shy smile revealed.
Slowly, her hands curled into taut fists at her sides, and as gradually relaxed again.
An object lesson in how not to look.
And one, she thought, that she would never forget.
CARLY ADJUSTED THE neckline of her dress, and gave it a long, disparaging look. As a garment, she supposed it was adequate. The material was good—a fine, silky crêpe—and it had been competently put together. But the Puritan grey did nothing for her, and with her hair twisted up into a smooth topknot she looked bland and unobtrusive, like a Victorian governess.
But that, of course, was precisely her intention.
It had been a long afternoon. She’d made another diffident offer of help downstairs which had been kindly but firmly refused. Instead she’d found herself being subjected to an exhaustive commentary on the problems of sheep farming in New Zealand by Aunt Grace.
In the end she’d taken refuge in a sunny corner of the garden, so far untouched by the demands of the party, with an armful of books from her childhood which she’d rescued from the attic. It had been wonderful to discover that The House at Pooh Corner had lost none of its old magic and step once more into Tom’s Midnight Garden. She found a new serenity burgeoning within her as she relaxed with them.
Over tea in the drawing-room she’d looked at the multitude of snapshots Aunt Grace had triumphantly produced of James, Louise and the children, and said all the right things. Or she hoped she had.
James looked flourishing, tanned and handsome. The kind of man who’d be an achiever whatever he set his hand to. But Louise, she thought privately, looked weary, her radiant blonde prettiness muted somehow, as if the everyday demands of babies and farming were becoming too much for her.
But then Louise had always enjoyed the urban life—London with its buzz, its theatres and parties. For her, the country had been somewhere to spend the occasional weekend. Strange then that she should have married James, and accepted the radical change of life-style he was offering, rather than one of his wealthy and sophisticated friends.
Of course, Louise might consider that the world she was used to was well lost for love, but Carly didn’t think so. Not on the evidence of these photographs, anyway.
As soon as she could, she escaped upstairs again, and had a lingering, scented bath, mindful of her mother’s adjuration to vacate the bathroom in good time, ready for Susan’s use.
‘It is her night, after all, dear.’
Carly felt that the reminder was unnecessary. She was conscious too of a nagging disappointment that Susan’s house-viewing trip was taking so long. It had been ages since she’d seen her sister—talked to her. In fact, it was Christmas, she realised. Each time she’d been home briefly since, Susan had been preoccupied with Anthony.
She took one last look at herself, and turned away from the mirror, glancing at her watch. Well, Sue was bound to have returned by now. She could go down to her room and chat to her while she got ready, as they’d done when they were younger.
She went down the short flight of stairs, and walked along the passage. As she lifted a hand to tap at the door, it occurred to her that once she would simply have barged cheerfully in.
‘Come in,’ Sue called, and Carly turned the handle and walked into the room.
Sue swung round on her dressing-stool. ‘Oh, it’s you.’ Her smile was perfunctory. ‘How are you, Caro?’
‘I’m fine.’ Carly deposited herself on the bed. ‘You don’t mind if I stay—talk to you while you dress?’
Sue shrugged. ‘If you want. But I don’t have a lot of time to spare. I stayed longer than I should have done with Anthony’s mother, talking about the wedding.’
‘Oh.’ Carly hesitated for a moment. ‘Would you like me to do your make-up for you?’
‘No, thank you.’ Sue’s voice had an edge to it. ‘I may not have the professional touch, but I’ve managed adequately up to now. Besides, Anthony prefers me to look natural.’
Carly felt herself flush. ‘I—wasn’t criticising. I thought it might relax you.’
‘I’m perfectly relaxed,’ Sue said shortly, reaching for the moisturiser.
Carly bit her lip. ‘I can always go away, if you prefer.’
‘No, you may as well stay. I’ve been wanting to talk to you anyway about arrangements for the wedding.’ She fidgeted for a moment with the lid of the jar, then burst out, ‘Caro, would you mind awfully if you weren’t a bridesmaid?’
Carly stared at her, feeling as if she’d been pole-axed. She said slowly, ‘Not a bridesmaid? But Sue, we promised each other ever since we were little … Of course I’d mind.’
‘Yes, I know that.’ Sue’s tone was impatient, dismissive. ‘But things change—circumstances alter. And I’ve decided to have just Anthony’s sisters instead. They’re both shorter than you, and blonde. It would be practically impossible to find a colour you all could wear, and next to them you’d look like a giraffe anyway.’
‘I—see.’ Hurt and disappointment were warring inside Carly with a growing anger. ‘It didn’t occur to you to have me alone?’
‘No, it didn’t, frankly.’
‘Even though I’m your only sister?’
Bright spots of colour burned in
