voice on the phone. He gave silent thanks that his children were all old enough to have been fully immunised, otherwise he wouldn’t have been able to help.
‘Yes, whooping cough and at least four babies have been exposed to it.’ Elly tucked back the few strands of hair that he was learning always fell forward against her cheek. Hair that his fingers itched to brush back so he could feel the silken strands caressing his skin, just like they had in his dream last night.
From the moment he’d dropped her home from the hospital, he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about her. Thinking about them as a couple. They’d been separated now for longer than they’d been together and when they’d parted he’d made the decision not to ever think back. There’d been no point; at first because he’d been too angry and hurt at her uncompromising position and abrupt departure, and then when his life had spiralled so far out of control with Jenna, thinking back and wishing for what might have been with Elly would have been a one-way ticket to despair. Elly hadn’t trusted him enough or loved him enough to stay, and Jenna had burned him so badly that the thought of any relationship had him ducking for cover. Yet last night he’d relived most of his time with Elly, in all its Technicolor glory, and he’d woken with an unfamiliar ache under his ribs that just wouldn’t shift. But right now she wasn’t looking at him like he’d been featuring in any of her dreams, although perhaps he’d made an appearance in her nightmares.
‘You should immunise your parents too even though they’re probably not mixing with kids, unless your brother or your sister’s had a child?’
The green in her eyes shimmered with barely concealed hurt; the main reason they’d separated. You have to tell her about the children.
But sick patients came first. The appropriate time for that story had to be finessed to avoid inflicting any more pain because he could still hear her departing words when she’d left. I want children now, Gabe, and it’s breaking my heart to love you.
He used every strand of concentration he had to return his focus to the present because the past was full of traps. ‘No, Vanessa’s still in Sydney, slaying corporate dragons, and Aaron’s still Aaron.’ He thought of his younger brother, whose easygoing lifestyle no longer mirrored his own, and immediately switched the conversation back to the job at hand, which, although dire, was in many ways safer. ‘Do you want a consult on the babies or shall I start with the backlog of walk-ins?’
‘I’d appreciate the consult, thanks.’
She smiled, her face lighting up with gratitude, and unexpected sadness throbbed inside him as he realised that was all it was. Yesterday he’d thought he’d seen desire flare in her eyes but perhaps that had just been wishful thinking. He’d been doing quite a bit of that in the last sixteen hours, which made no sense because he couldn’t turn back time, couldn’t change how they’d hurt each other or erase what had happened to him in the intervening two years. All he knew was that he was a completely different person from the man he’d been when he’d loved Elly. It stood to reason Elly had changed too.
She started walking. ‘It’s a bit of a rabbit warren to the children’s ward so follow me.’
The Midden Cove hospital sat high on the hill, its position garnering five-star views out across the Pacific Ocean. Like many Australian country hospitals, it had been built with money raised after the First World War specifically to care for returned servicemen. The position and spacious grounds would have been part of the plan because back in 1919 the healing qualities of sea-air had been as close to antibiotics as medicine got. Given the rising number of antibiotic-resistant bacteria, it was frightening to think that some things had come full circle.
As Gabe crossed the large built-in veranda, a shiver ran across his skin, which was crazy as it was a warm day.
Elly shot him an understanding look. ‘Often at three a.m. I think I can hear the ghosts of patients past lying in their old iron beds out here.’
He tried to shrug off the feeling. ‘You always did have an overactive imagination.’
She raised a questioning brow. ‘Oh, right, and you don’t? I saw you rub your arm.’
She’d always been incredibly observant and never missed much. Which is why you have to tell her about the kids sooner than later. He pulled open the door clearly labelled ‘Children’s Ward’ and ushered her inside. ‘Ironically, today we’ve gone back in time, dealing with an age-old illness.’
‘At least we’ve got antibiotics.’
‘True, but we both know how serious an illness this is for children under six months so we’re almost as impotent as medicos were before 1945.’
They walked into the isolation ward to see a pale and haggard woman sitting next to a cot. Elly put her hand on the mother’s shoulder. ‘Rachel, this is Gabe Lewis. He’s a … doctor too.’
Gabe heard the hesitation in her voice and wondered what she’d dropped from the sentence. Colleague, friend, lover? Once he’d considered himself to be all of those things. Ignoring the kernel of disappointment that buried itself deep inside him, he smiled at Rachel, totally understanding her fear for her child, and then reached out to stroke Millie’s head.
Recognition lit Rachel’s face. ‘Oh, you’re Cathleen’s son.’
He nodded as a rush of acid burned his stomach. Damn small towns, where everyone knows everybody. He tried to pre-empt the conversation and direct it away from him.
But Rachel got in first. ‘I bet you’re busy with—’
An incessant beeping split the air and Elly watched Gabe’s expression, which had already changed from open to tense, immediately become all doctor. He firmly stimulated Millie to take a breath by blowing on her face and rubbing her chest with his hand.
‘Why does that machine keep beeping?’ Rachel’s pinched and pale face stared up at her.
The question somehow managed to penetrate Elly’s brain, which was still spinning from the fact Gabe had greeted the baby by caressing Millie’s head. The Gabe she’d known had always been slightly aloof and uncomfortable around children, but right up until the machine had announced its urgent message, he’d looked anything but uncomfortable with Millie. If anything, he’d looked uneasy with Rachel.
She hauled her concentration back to the scared mother. ‘Millie’s having trouble breathing and sometimes she stops for a short time, and that’s called ap-noea. The mattress she’s lying on tells us when that happens.’
Rachel laced her fingers tightly. ‘But she starts again, right? She’ll always start again, won’t she?’
Elly wished she could promise her that. Out of the corner of her eye she watched Gabe examining the baby, his forehead furrowed by a line as deep as a trench. ‘Millie’s receiving oxygen and has started on antibiotics, but she’s not responding as fast as we’d hoped.’
Gabe swung his stethoscope round his neck and with eyes filled with concern he bobbed down so he was at the same height as Rachel. ‘Believe me, I get how terrifying this must be for you, and Elly’s done everything by the book, but Midden Cove’s not equipped to handle a baby this sick. Millie’s not improving, she’s getting worse.’
Rachel grabbed Gabe’s arms. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Millie’s going to need assistance to breathe. The sooner
