leaving her on her own once again. Only this time she was ready. All decisions about whether or not to have children would be made by her. And as soon as she got home, she was going to act on them. Seeing him again had just brought home all her reasons for wanting a child, and that longing she’d had as she’d carried Grace over those nine months.
All she needed to do was select a sperm donor and she’d be ready to start a family of her own.
For a few brief seconds she’d wanted to throw that letter from the clinic in his face, the way he’d thrown his decision about not having children in hers, but what would it solve?
Nothing.
She didn’t want to hurt Tucker. She just wanted a baby. Not to replace Grace. That would never happen. She would always love her little girl and be grateful for the time they’d had together. At times, Grace’s loss still caused her lungs to seize in the middle of the night as she lay there alone in bed. Any tiny sound in the dark would make her sit up, sure she’d heard a familiar cry. Wishing with all her might that she had heard that cry. And when she realized no one was there, Kady would be the one who cried.
Surely her daughter wouldn’t have wanted her to be stuck in limbo like this, never moving forward. She’d like to think Grace would have wanted her to go on living, to love and be loved. And she was finally ready to share that love. With another baby.
She tried to focus on that and block out the negative thoughts that were steadily creeping into her head.
And the best way to hold those at bay was to stay as far away from Dr. Tucker Stevenson as possible.
TUCKER HAD NO idea why Phil Harold, the department head, wanted to see him. He was already running behind on his appointments and had a surgery scheduled at two o’clock this afternoon. At this rate, he’d be late to the convention workshop today. The convention. Great. Where he’d probably see Kady again.
How in the hell had any of this happened? He’d come to New York to get away from her. No, not from her. From the pain and memories of what had happened in Atlanta. Except some things—unlike his old golf clubs—weren’t as easy to leave behind. Some of them had followed him. And seeing Kady again had been like a punch to the gut, reawaking the guilt of not being able to give her what she’d wanted.
It was just for a week, though. Surely he could maintain some kind of poker face for that long. Then she’d fly back home. Life would return to normal.
Or some semblance of normal.
He rapped on the door, irritated that his thoughts seemed to keep circling his ex.
“Come.”
The curt command didn’t faze him. Phil was that way with everyone. And, as far as he knew, he hadn’t done anything to tick the man off. Not this week, anyway.
He pushed through the door and paused. Someone else was already in there. “Sorry, I can—”
“No, come in. This concerns both of you.”
Both?
Taking another look at the chair’s occupant, his stomach curdled in protest. Talk about circling. Think about her, and she appeared.
What the hell was Kady doing here?
He’d figured she’d be out lounging by the pool this morning, wearing one of those skimpy bikinis she tended to favor. Memories of creamy skin and long, lithe limbs flashed through his skull, only to be ejected in a hurry.
Not even going there.
That was what had gotten him into trouble in the first place.
He chose to remain standing by the door, even as Phil took his seat again. “You have a group of medical students scheduled to shadow you this week between conference sessions. Are you ready for them?”
Oh, hell, he’d completely forgotten about that. Since most of his workshop responsibilities were in the late afternoons, Phil had asked if a small contingent of students who were interested in obstetrics and pediatrics could follow him on his rounds.
That still didn’t explain why Kady was here.
“I am. Thanks for the reminder, though.” Even he could hear the tightness in his voice.
Kady was just as tense. He saw it in the stiff set of her spine, in the way her neck was set squarely between her shoulders. And her hands were clutched together, pressed against her belly. A protective posture. Remembered from her pregnancy all those years ago? His own stomach muscles squeezed against each other.
She’d known Phil was going to call him in here.
“Dr. Blacke was going to help originally, but since he can’t be here, I thought Dr. McPherson might agree to take his place, since your specialties tie together in some areas. I’ve been trying to coax her into it. She thinks you might object for some reason. You don’t. Correct?”
He waited for Kady to offer up some other kind of excuse, but she just sat there like a stone. It was up to him to derail this train.
“No objections, but I’m sure Dr. McPherson didn’t come here expecting to practice medicine.”
Phil’s glance went from him to Kady. “Can we count on you to help a sister hospital train up a new generation of doctors?”
Leave it to the department head to make it almost impossible to refuse. It was a weapon the man used well.
“Well... Of course. If you think it would help.”
The hesitation was obvious. But he knew Phil well enough to know that he would purposely ignore it. And there was no way he could signal her without his boss seeing it.
And Phil wasn’t asking anything out of the ordinary. He and Dr. Blacke normally did a kind of back and forth dialogue with medical students.
“Yes, it would help Dr. Stevenson out immensely.”
Of course it would.
Tucker was barely able to suppress the eye-roll he felt coming on. He covered it by asking, “Any idea who will take Gordy’s place during his treatment?”
“Not yet. We’re still looking for his replacement.” He glanced at Kady, a speculative smile curving his lips. “You wouldn’t consider transferring to our neck of the woods, would you?”
Kady’s hands uncurled and her thumb went to the back of her ring finger and scrubbed at it. Trying to remove any reminders of what was once there? She’d mailed the rings back to him. He still had them somewhere. Why, he had no idea.
“No, I’m sorry. I’m getting ready to—” Her voice came to an abrupt stop, along with her thumb, before starting up again. “I have a lot going on in Atlanta right now. And my family is there.”
Kady’s grandparents. They were good people who’d raised her after her parents had been killed in a car accident. He respected them. And Kady loved them like crazy. He’d left
