she spoke, torn between hope and dread. ‘Mind you, that was in London. There must be loads of doctors…’
‘Danny’s from London,’ Shona shrugged. ‘He’s on a year’s rotation here—maybe it is him!’ Oblivious to Louise’s expression, she glanced around the room. ‘I’ll go and get a gown for the new admission and a kidney dish, then you might as well go for your coffee-break before the new admission comes up.’
As surely as if a cricket ball had hit her at high speed, Louise felt as if the wind had literally been knocked out of her, could feel her scarlet cheeks paling as the blood literally drained from her face. Shaking, she lowered herself onto the newly made bed and buried her face in her hands, still, at the eleventh hour, trying to reassure herself that it was a simple mistake, that the man in the next room wasn’t really Daniel.
And wondering how on earth she’d cope if indeed it was!
‘Jordan needs suctioning urgently.’ One of the student nurses came racing down the corridor, looking more than a little alarmed. ‘His chest sounds terrible.’
Instantly Louise snapped to attention, her personal dilemma completely pushed aside as she heard the note of urgency in the student’s voice. ‘What happened?’ Louise asked, as she made her way swiftly down the ward, because even though it was Elaine’s patient, a tracheostomy patient with breathing difficulties couldn’t wait for anyone. ‘Who’s in with him?’
‘Just me,’ the student started, her voice trailing off as she realised the folly of her ways as she said the words out loud. Louise would need to talk to her about it later. Now wasn’t the time or place to tell her never to leave a patient who had difficulty breathing distressed and unattended. Bracing herself for what she might find, hearing his distress from halfway down the corridor, Louise flew the last few steps.
‘It’s OK, Jordan.’ Louise’s voice was reassuring as she entered the room, straight away pushing the call bell for further assistance. Pulling on a pair of gloves, she carefully checked his tracheostomy, relieved to see that it was securely in place. From her handover sheet, Louise knew that Jordan had been in a high-impact motor-vehicle accident two months previously—a mixture of booze, dope and high jinks had almost ended his life. Along with abdominal injuries, he had suffered head and facial injuries. The facial injuries had compromised his airway, necessitating a tracheostomy, which he was being weaned off. But the tracheostomy tube could sometimes fall out or, as was the case in this instance, as Louise immediately decided after a brief assessment, a patient’s airway could become blocked with a mucous plug. Jordan still had air entry, his chest was moving on inspiration, but the air entry was poor and he was clearly distressed.
Louise turned on the suction machine, checking the soft rubber’s patency and lubricating it at the same time with some sterile water, then guided the tube into the airway, placing her finger over the connection to close the circuit and allow the machine to suction the blockage, as Jordan coughed and wheezed.
‘His sats are dropping, they’re only…’ the student said in a alarmed voice as she placed the probe on Jordan’s finger. But Louise silenced her with a wide-eyed glare—panic was the very last thing Jordan needed right now.
‘It’s OK, Jordan,’ Louise soothed over the noisy suction machine. ‘Give me a big cough and we’ll soon have you breathing normally.’
‘Good man!’ Shona was in the room now, rubbing Jordan’s back, assisting him to cough, and Louise was grateful for her calming manner. A compromised airway was a medical emergency and if the partial blockage wasn’t shifted quickly then an emergency call would have to be put out, but with tracheostomies, events like this unfortunately weren’t unusual. A calm, efficient manner was often more beneficial than having loud overhead chimes and doctors rushing into the room.
‘There we go.’ The gurgle of the suction machine and the loud whistling cough as she removed the blockage had everyone in the room, especially Jordan, breathing a touch easier.
‘How is he?’ Elaine’s voice was brisk as she swung into the room and pulled on gloves of her own.
‘Better now,’ Louise said. ‘He had a large mucous plug. He’s still very gurgly, though—he needs deep suction…’
‘I’ll do that,’ Elaine said, briskly and rather rudely taking over. ‘Kelly wants to speak to you.’
‘It can wait, Elaine! Louise is obviously busy.’ Louise recognised the voice from the doorway as Kelly’s, but her words were wasted as a determinedly efficient Elaine took over, clearly feeling her skills were what was needed here. Louise peeled off her gloves and washed her hands, before stepping outside.
‘Well done,’ Kelly said. ‘You handled that well—you’ve clearly worked with trachies before.’
‘It doesn’t mean I like them.’ Louise smiled wryly, only realising now the emergency was over how much it had actually shaken her. ‘I’ve been out of nursing for a few months…’
‘That’s right. You’ve got a young baby, haven’t you?’ The light above her flashed and Louise stood rigid as Kelly paused, clearly expecting Louise to attend to the patient rather than remain talking to her.
‘It’s Elaine’s patient,’ Louise said, as Kelly gave her a rather surprised look. ‘She said I should let her know if he buzzes. Apparently he’s a doctor here.’
‘Ah yes.’ Kelly nodded and popped her head into Room 4. ‘Danny’s buzzing, Elaine—I’ve told Louise to get it.’
Louise could only imagine Elaine’s face, but the thought didn’t stay. Instead, her heart was racing and she could hear the blood pounding in her ears as she approached the forbidden door, bracing herself for what was on the other side, hoping, knowing she was surely wrong, but somehow wishing she could be right. Every emotion she possessed tumbled in confusion as she pushed open the door and stepped inside because, despite the closed curtains and darkened room, there was no mistaking the face lying on the pillow that turned to face her as she entered—a face she’d seen lying on a pillow so many, many times, but under much kinder circumstances. Her fears, her wishes were all answered crashingly as she stared into familiar, shocked, indigo eyes.
‘Hello, Daniel.’ She must have said it because she could hear the words fill the shocked silence, but her voice didn’t sound like her own, the light-hearted, easy way she’d once greeted him light years from this strained, forced greeting as she stared at the man who had once adored her—the man who had then so cruelly hurt her.
Stared at the father of her son.
LOUISE!
Daniel didn’t say it, just stared at the opening door and the woman walking into his room, his face tightening in disbelief as she paused in the doorway. He tried to convince himself that he must surely be hallucinating as he held back the name that was on the tip of his tongue, had been on the tip of his tongue for ages now. He was terrified of making even more of a fool of himself in front of his colleagues, of calling out her name only to watch his Louise morph into one of the regular nurses on the ward. So instead he blinked a few times, tried to convince himself that it wasn’t her—that surely it was the drugs or pain or anaesthetic causing his mind to play tricks.
It couldn’t be her!
He
