noticing frostiness.’
‘Everything’s fine,’ he lied.
She laid her palms flat on the table. ‘Take it from someone who’s been through two divorces, what I saw was far from fine. This job … it puts a strain on even the strongest of relationships. The hours can be shit, but it’s more than that. It’s the knowledge that the world is a terrifying place, and being unable to share those experiences with the ones you love for fear of dragging them into the mire.’ Her cheeks flushed as she realized she’d overstepped the mark. ‘You need each other more than ever now.’
He forced eye contact. ‘Please don’t keep me out of the picture, ma’am. I can be useful. Nobody knows my daughter better than I do. I promise not to go off half-cocked, and to work as part of the team, but please don’t leave me out in the cold.’
‘Ray, you know I don’t have a choice in the matter. It’s a massive conflict of interest to have you anywhere near the Incident Room.’
‘I can provide valuable intelligence, ma’am. Like-like-like mine and Alex’s schedules and the places we’ve been where the suspect may have first seen her.’
‘And as her father, I would expect you to provide those details to one of the investigative team, but you’re too close to this, Ray. Come on, don’t make this any harder than it already is. You’re a valuable member of my team, and I’d love your determination and experience on the case, but my hands are tied. If you push me on this, I’ll have no choice but to put you on leave until the case is closed.’ She paused and stared empathetically. ‘Of course, I don’t want to do that.’
He knew there was no point in arguing with her, and he wasn’t surprised by her stance, but Trent had always been a reasonable governor, and he had hoped to convince her of his usefulness.
‘Before you go, there’s something else I need to ask: what were you doing at Gianni Demetrios’s casino last night?’
His head snapped up and eyes widened. ‘How did you—?’
She cut him off by dropping an A4-sized colour photograph on the desk. Ray immediately recognized Demetrios’s office from the night before. He could see why Trent had concerns.
‘Where did you get this from?’
‘It was emailed to me in the early hours of this morning. It was a taunt, with the subject line, “Who polices the police?”. Do you realize how badly this reflects on me and the unit? I’ve spent two years trying to nail that son of a bitch, and now it looks like members of my team are cozying up to him.’
‘It’s just a photograph. It doesn’t mean anything.’
‘No, but it’s what it implies. What were you talking to him about?’
‘He knows the worst of the worst,’ Ray tried to explain. ‘And I thought if anybody had been planning to get back at me for something, then he might know about it, or be able to point me in the right direction.’
She narrowed her eyes. ‘Is that what you think happened yesterday? That someone you once banged up snatched your daughter to … what … get revenge?’
He looked at her sheepishly.
She ripped up the photograph and dropped the pieces in her waste bin. ‘I’ve seconded PC Isla Murphy to act as Family Liaison. I sent her to your place this morning and she’s messaged to say she’s made contact with Alex.’ She paused, standing and offering him a sincere look. ‘Take my advice, Ray: go home, and get yourself cleaned up. Maybe it would be better if you took a couple of days off. Spend it with Alex. Console and reassure her. She needs you now more than ever; you need each other.’ She pointed at the door – her cue that the meeting was over.
Pulling the tie back over his head, he walked to the exit. Stumbling out into the fresh air, he made his way along the road to a newsagents where he purchased a sandwich, a bottle of juice, a packet of gum and a fresh carton of cigarettes. He needed to focus. Despite Trent’s reservations, there was no way he was prepared to sit back while his daughter was still out there needing him.
Stepping out of the shower, Alex couldn’t ignore the overwhelming feeling of guilt sweeping through her core. How could she be acting so normally when Carol-Anne was out there, alone and in huge danger? As much as the sheer terror remained, no further tears would flow; as if she had no more tears to give. What did that mean? Had some part of her subconscious mind already given up hope that Carol-Anne would return safely home?
Taking a deep breath, she shook the thought from her mind and, wiping condensation from the mirror with the edge of her towel, she stared at the tired-looking reflection in the mirror.
How could you be so stupid? How could you turn your back on her? How could you allow someone to take her?
It still didn’t feel real. Tying a smaller towel around her wet hair, she almost expected to hear the sweet giggle coming from the bedroom next door. As she opened the bathroom door, she was only greeted by silence.
Isla had decided to dial into the team brief from her car, and Alex could see her head bobbing inside the small red car in the driveway. She could only hope that there was positive news. For a city supposedly covered in security and traffic cameras, one of them had to have captured the moment it had happened. Or the vehicle the culprit had used to make their escape.
Alex had replayed the events over and over in her mind as the hot water had thundered against her neck and shoulders. Could she have done something differently? As soon as she’d realized Carol-Anne was missing, could she have done more? She had checked the immediate vicinity, but why hadn’t she gone from car to car, looking for anyone who might have been restraining a frightened child?
Reliving the nightmare was doing nothing to ease the pain and guilt of her reckless choice. Even if her face was masking that burden, every muscle could feel it weighing her down.
Ray had yet to return any of her calls or messages. She knew his words in the back of the car had been delivered in anger, and that he had probably regretted them the moment they had spewed, yet that didn’t make them any less hurtful. Why hadn’t he come home yet? Was he chasing down a lead? Maybe it was a positive sign that he had yet to message her: maybe Trent and her team had already identified the culprit and were fast on their way to make an arrest. And maybe that was why Isla was nodding in the car.
Throwing on tracksuit bottoms and a vest top, Alex didn’t have a clue about how to spend the day. Her car was still with the police technicians, so she couldn’t go anywhere, and even if she had the car, she wasn’t sure there was anywhere she would want to go. It was at times like this that she missed her mum and dad the most. And having been an only child, she had no close family she could speak to. She probably should call Ray’s sister and tell her what had happened, but how could she even begin to explain?
As she prepared to head back downstairs, she couldn’t resist the urge to go into Carol-Anne’s room, inhaling her daughter’s smell. The tiny bed was neatly made, as it had been yesterday, and each of Carol-Anne’s favourite teddies were resting against the edge of the frame.
Apart from one.
Carol-Anne had insisted on taking Ballet Bunny
