At the End of the Day. James W. Moore
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AT THE END OF THE DAY HOW WILL YOU BE REMEMBERED?
Copyright © 2002 by Dimensions for Living
All rights reserved.
No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system, except as may be expressly permitted by the 1976 Copyright Act or in writing from the publisher. Requests for permission should be addressed in writing to Dimensions for Living, P.O. Box 801, 201 Eighth Avenue South, Nashville, TN 37202-0801.
This book is printed on acid-free paper.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Moore, James W. (James Wendell), 1938-
At the end of the day : how will you be remembered? / James W. Moore.
p. cm.
ISBN 0-687-04513-4 (pbk. : alk. paper)
1. Christian life—Methodist authors. I. Title.
BV4501.3 .M655 2002
248.4—dc21
2002004254
Scripture quotations, unless otherwise noted, are from the New Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright © 1989, by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission.
Those noted RSV are from the Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright © 1946, 1952, 1971 by the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission.
Those noted JBP are from The New Testament in Modern English, rev. ed., trans. J. B. Phillips (New York: Macmillan Publishing Co., 1973).
ISBN 978-0-687-04513-6
10 11 — 109 8 7
MANUFACTURED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
At the End of the Day
When your days on this earth are completed, how will you be remembered? When all is said and done—in the final analysis, "at the end of the day"—what will be your lasting legacy? When people think back over the full spectrum of your life, what will be the most obvious memories of you that will immediately jump into their minds? If your family and friends and acquaintances tried to sum up your life in one word or one phrase, what would that word or phrase be?
When I, as a pastor, sit down with a grief-stricken family to plan the funeral for a loved one who has died, I usually do two things that I have found to be very therapeutic for the family. First, we talk through the details of the memorial service, and second, I ask the family to reminisce with me about their loved one, to think back over the scope of that person's life, and to lift up and say aloud that person's top qualities or attributes.
It's an amazing experience to watch and hear a family do that. They will cry; they will laugh; they will sum up their loved one's life in a word or a phrase, or in a single sentence.
"Kindness . . . that's the word; she was just so kind to everyone."
"Family . . . it has to be family. She was so devoted to her family, so proud of her family."
"Caregiver ... that says it all. She gave her life taking care of others."
"Gentleman . . . he was such a gentleman. Whoever coined the word gentleman must have had someone like him in mind."
"Sense of humor . . . he was so witty and so fun. He never took himself too seriously. He could light up the room with his humor."
"Churchman . . . he loved the church so much."
As I go through this poignant experience with a family, I am always so touched and inspired, and I find myself wondering what words or phrases my family and friends would use to sum up my life when my days on this earth are completed.
I have found that most of the time, people are kind and gracious and thoughtful in their remembering; but this was not always the case. In earlier days, the remembering was done for all to see on tombstones—sometimes with humor and often with amazingly blunt candor. For example, below is a list of actual epitaphs on tombstones from earlier generations.
On the grave of Ezekiel Aikle in Nova Scotia, we find these words:
Here lies Ezekiel Aikle
Age 102
The Good Die Young
In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery, we find this inscription on a tombstone:
Anna Wallace . . .
The children of Israel
Wanted bread
And the Lord sent
Them manna
Old clerk Wallace
Wanted a sweet wife
And the Devil sent him Anna.
In 1837, in Winslow, Maine, somebody was unhappy with a man named Beza Wood, and here's the epitaph on his tombstone:
In memory of Beza Wood
Departed this life November 2, 1837
Aged 45 years
Here lies one Wood
Enclosed in wood
One Wood within another;
The outer wood is very good
We cannot praise the other.
In a cemetery in England, we find this poem:
Remember me as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I,