where he is today? Because we were trying to be something we are not. Oh, my goodness, I do believe I’m going to faint,” her mother said, waving a hand in front of her face.
“You are not going to faint,” Maggie said sternly, as if saying it in such a tone would prevent her mother from keeling over. Harriet’s face was quite flushed, Maggie had to acknowledge, but just now her mother’s chatter was more irritating than anything else. She knew, more than anyone, what being a pretender meant.
Before they reached the top step, Maggie looked up to see Elizabeth breaking away from her husband and rushing toward her, completely unmindful that she was a pregnant woman rushing headlong toward a set of hard marble stairs. The two friends embraced, and it was so strange to feel Elizabeth’s belly protruding. Elizabeth had always been so painfully thin, thanks to her mother’s strict diet and stricter control. Both woman were laughing and crying and clinging together as if it had been years and years they’d been apart instead of just a few long months.
“You look absolutely stunning,” Maggie gushed, meaning every syllable. Elizabeth, who had always been a beauty, had gained some much-needed weight. She had about her an air of exuberant health, the quintessential glow of pregnancy.
Elizabeth stepped back, wiped the tears from her eyes using a handkerchief instantly produced by her husband, and placed her hands upon her belly. “Randall says I am a cow.”
“A lovely Hereford, if I recall,” His Grace interjected.
Maggie watched the miracle of two people who’d hardly known each other on their wedding day look at each other with such unabashed love it was almost painful to witness. Especially painful for a woman who knew she would never know such love.
Just beyond the duke and duchess, a small commotion was growing, and it seemed as if a crowd was forming in Bellewood’s grand entrance. Maggie was vaguely aware of the sound of children, which didn’t quite make sense since there were no children at Bellewood, as well as a man and woman. Elizabeth was saying something to her, something about visitors and how she was certain she would be happy to have a familiar face here in England.
That’s when she saw him, her very own earl, and realized with heartbreaking surety that she loved him still.
Chapter 5
It felt stunningly like being hit with a large and unexpected wave, slamming into her with such force Maggie literally stepped back from it. Lord Hollings was here. And he was standing next to a very pretty older woman with shockingly red hair. The two were surrounded by what appeared to be a brood of children.
“You remember Lord Hollings,” Elizabeth said, stepping aside so she might get a better view of him. “And this is Lady Matilda, Lord Hollings’ step-aunt. And four of her children, Mary, Janice, Robert, and Nathan.”
“Two others are all grown up and on their own,” Lady Matilda said with a musical laugh. “So glad to finally meet you.”
Maggie concentrated on her, on the woman with her hand extended, on her pretty navy blue dress, that looked so lovely with her dark blue eyes and red hair. Don’t look at him, don’t.
“Miss Pierce.” He said her name and it sounded exactly as in her dreams, deep and slightly rough, a sound that made her chest ache.
Instead of immediately acknowledging Lord Hollings, Maggie grasped the woman’s hand. “So pleased to meet you, Lady Matilda,” she said, calling forth every ounce of social graces she possessed. She truly wanted to lift her skirts and run from the room, screaming like a banshee.
Why hadn’t Elizabeth warned her? Why? Then again, why should she? No one had known, especially not Lord Hollings, how desperately she had fallen in love. But perhaps he had known and that is why he’d managed to leave New York on the first available ship, a man escaping a desperate spinster.
Finally, she gathered the courage to turn to him. “Lord Hollings,” she said, proud that her acting skills were so intact. She gave him her warmest smile and grasped his hand briefly in greeting, glad she still wore her gloves and couldn’t feel the intimacy of his warm touch. “It’s so lovely to see you again.”
“Likewise,” he said.
Maggie turned immediately to Elizabeth, giving her a chastising look, but she could tell Lord Hollings stared at her or at least she imagined he did. “Elizabeth, you did not tell me you were living in a palace. Or should I call you Your Grace? Your Graces?” She let out a bit of laughter, feeling quite like she was about to lose the very tenuous grip she had on her emotions. She forged ahead.
“Your last letter to me had me believing you were living in a shambles, in a deteriorating old castle that was falling down upon your head. Mama, isn’t this the most beautiful home you’ve ever seen?”
Elizabeth laughed, then pulled her friend in for another embrace. “I’ve missed you so much, Maggie,” she said, tears making her eyes shine brightly. “You must bring Arthur here to live for I shall not let you go.”
At the mention of Arthur’s name, Maggie almost lost her smile. Of course, Elizabeth wouldn’t know about Arthur. She wouldn’t know about anything. She wouldn’t know they were destitute, that her father was in prison, that Arthur had jilted her, that she was completely ruined beyond redemption. That every time she smiled she felt as if something inside her was bending and would surely snap in two if she were forced to smile too much. She wouldn’t know anything.
“That’s a splendid idea. I do believe Maggie could convince Arthur of anything,” her mother said in a frenetically joyous way that left Maggie with no other choice but to lie or else make a fool of her mother. She wished her mother had given her some sort of warning that, in addition to pretending their maids had abandoned them, she would have to pretend she was still engaged.
“I shall write Arthur this very day and tell him to book passage,” Maggie said brightly, after giving her mother a telling look. “Do you think there’s room enough here for us both?” Her mother was so visibly relieved by her daughter’s fabrications, Maggie felt slightly less guilty for lying to her friend. She had plenty of time to tell the truth.
The small gathering laughed and Maggie was quite certain she had fooled them all, though she didn’t dare look at Lord Hollings. He’d always had an uncanny way of seeing right through her. When she finally gathered the courage to look his way, she realized how foolish she was being for thinking whatever she said even mattered to him. He was engaged in a conversation with one of the children and apparently not even paying attention to her.
“You must be exhausted,” Elizabeth said. “Your things should be in your rooms by now.” She turned to a plainly dressed woman standing sedately off to one side. “Mrs. Stevens, would you please have someone escort Miss Pierce and Mrs. Pierce to their rooms? Dinner is at eight, but we often meet in the library before if you’re up to it.”
“You sound much too much like your mother,” Maggie joked, then laughed at the look of pure horror on her friend’s face. Then the two women dissolved into laughter.
“You are just what my wife needed,” the duke said. “She thinks I’m entirely too stodgy. This house needs a bit more laughter.”
Maggie and her mother made their escape to their rooms, following behind a crisply dressed upstairs maid. Her mother chatted beside her, completely unaware that her daughter was on the edge of losing herself. Her entire body felt numb and she was shaking uncontrollably. Only by grasping her hands tightly
