The Doctor's Calling. Stella Bagwell
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When he finally lifted his head and broke the contact between them, Laurel was visibly shaken, and she stared at him as fear came rushing in behind a wall of desire.
“What—Why did you do that?” she finally managed to ask.
Regret, or something like it, twisted his features. “I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
“I don’t want to hear that from you.”
“All right. You won’t,” he retorted, his demeanor suddenly changing back to the boss she’d dealt with for the past five fears.
With a tiny groan, she twisted away from him and hurried out of the kitchen. He followed her into the living room, but stopped a few feet away from where she stood near the picture window.
Glancing over her shoulder, her gaze slid over him, his stance wide and his hands thrust deep into the pockets of his coat. Although there was nothing inviting about the expression on his face, Laurel still wanted to run and fling her arms around him.
She was crazy, she thought. Hopelessly crazy.
“If you’ve seen enough, I think we’d better be heading on to the other house,” he suggested gruffly.
Laurel looked out the window and wondered why now, after all this time, she felt tears burning her throat and stinging the backs of her eyes. Since Lainey had died, she rarely ever shed tears over anything. It wasn’t right that Russ could pull that much emotion from her.
She said stiffly, “If you don’t mind, I’d rather stay here and look at things a bit more.”
“All right. I’ll be back in a few minutes,” he told her.
She nodded and he quickly left the house. From her spot at the window, she watched his headlights pull away, then head on up the mountain. But once they were completely out of sight, she sank weakly onto the arm of the couch and dropped her head in her hands.
This wasn’t going to work, she thought sickly. Not this lovely little house, or the job, or him. Because his kiss had shown her exactly how much she was missing and all the things she could never have. Wherever she went on this ranch he’d be nearby and his kiss would be haunting her, tempting her. How could she ever endure that much misery?
She’d have to bear it, she told herself. Or live her life without him. And that was a choice she wasn’t quite ready to make.
Chapter Four
By the time Russ returned a half hour later, Laurel had managed to compose herself somewhat and was determined to act as though nothing had happened between her and her boss.
But the moment she climbed into the truck and they pulled away from the house, Russ said, “That kiss—I honestly don’t know what came over me, Laurel. You were—well, it was nice to see you smile and hear you laugh. It’s been a big relief to me that you’ve agreed to continue working as my assistant, and I guess I got carried away for a moment.”
“That’s all?” she asked stiffly, wondering why his explanation left her feeling strangely deflated.
“That’s all. So I think we should both forget it. Don’t you?”
Forcing herself to glance his way, she saw that he was focused on the dirt road in front of them and his profile gave none of his feelings away. But that was hardly a surprise. The only times she’d ever seen Russ show much emotion were when they were treating animals that had been deliberately hurt or neglected. When it came to people, he appeared to not feel much at all.
So why had she felt so, so much in his kiss? she wondered.
Swallowing at the thickness in her throat, she turned her attention to the passenger window. Even the darkness couldn’t hide the heavy snowfall that was already collecting on the tree branches and ground vegetation near the edge of the road.
“Consider it forgotten,” she said, then cleared her throat to ease the huskiness in her voice. “What did you think of your house?”
“It was fine. It has everything I need.” He paused for a moment before adding, “I’ve hired a moving van to bring my things out on Thursday. If you’d like to have your things hauled with mine, I’ll send the movers by your place.”
“Will there be enough room for my stuff on the truck, too?” she asked, while she tried her best to focus on the necessary things she had to do in the next few days. But that was hard to do when her mind kept reliving the feel of his lips on hers, the touch of his hand on her face. She’d told him she would forget their kiss, but how did a person go about forgetting their hopes and dreams, their deepest longings?
“Plenty. I’m downsizing on furniture and lots of other belongings. In fact, I’ve already scheduled a charity to pick up a load of things that I don’t need or want to bring with me.”
“Oh. In that case, I’ll take you up on the offer. It’ll be just as easy to pay you as it would be for me to hire a mover for my stuff.”
“I won’t accept any pay from you,” he said gruffly. “Consider it a job perk. I’m the cause of this move, so the expense should be on me.”
Russ had always been a generous boss. Not only did he pay her a hefty salary, he also included nice benefits with it. But the earnings she made were not what kept her by his side, and sometimes she wondered if he realized that.
“In that case, I’ll accept your offer.”
He briefly glanced her way and then, turning his attention back to the road, shook his head. “You don’t like to accept help from anyone, do you?”
Surprised by his question, she studied his profile. “I don’t like to be beholden to anyone.”
“Why? Afraid they might ask something of you that you can’t give?”
She frowned at him. “That’s a strange question. You make it sound like I don’t like people. Period.”
“Sometimes I don’t believe you do. Animals, yes.” he conceded. “But not people.”
His remark took her aback, and she turned her face toward the window so he couldn’t see how much it had affected her. “I can’t imagine why you would think such a thing,” she said lowly.
Because you don’t encourage anyone to get close to you, Russ wanted to say, but stopped himself short. He’d already gotten personal enough with her tonight. In fact, he didn’t know what in hell had come over him back there in Laurel’s house. The two of them had been discussing the rooms and furnishings, and then suddenly, without even realizing it, he’d found himself standing close to her, and she’d looked so warm and pretty, her lips so inviting.
With a mental shake of his head, he once again tried to push the thoughts of kissing her out of his mind, but each time he shoved, they came right back to torment him. He’d never expected her to taste so sweet, or that kissing her would feel so perfect, and he was far more shaken than he wanted to admit.
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