not going to make excuses.’
How could he be so calm? ‘You deceived us, Ethan.’ Her voice broke and she hated herself for showing just how badly his betrayal had hurt her. ‘You deceived us all. Not just me but Logan, Evanna—the whole island. We thought—we thought you were—’
‘You thought I was Ethan Walker, and that’s exactly who I am.’
She looked him full in the face, not giving him room for escape. ‘But you’re also Catherine’s brother,’ she said in a whisper. ‘Catherine’s brother.’
He stepped towards her. ‘Kyla—’
‘You’re not a stranger. It wasn’t serendipity that brought you here. You came here for a reason. You came to find her child, didn’t you? You came for your niece. You came after Kirsty.‘
Tension stiffened his shoulders. ‘I wanted to meet her, yes.’
‘No, Ethan.’ Kyla shook her head and hugged her arms around her waist. ‘Wanting to meet her would have been you walking off that ferry and saying, “Hi, I’m Kirsty’s uncle.” And you didn’t do that. You stayed on the edges and watched. You ate our food and you drank our drink. You listened to our conversations and lived our lives with us, and all the time you were just watching.’
‘There were things I needed to understand. I wanted to get to know you all.’
‘And is that your excuse for making love to me? Did you need a few extra intimate details for your research?’ She forced herself to say the words—forced herself to stare hurt in the face. ‘I suppose that’s the ultimate way of getting to know someone, isn’t it? What are you going to do next? Move on to Evanna just to check that you know her, too?’
‘Don’t, Kyla—’
‘Don’t what? Don’t face up to facts? I’m being honest, which is more than you’ve been up until now.’
His shoulders were tense. ‘What happened between us had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I’m Catherine’s brother.’
‘Yes, it did, because you wouldn’t even have been here if you hadn’t been Catherine’s brother! We would never have met. You deliberately hid your identity from me. From all of us.’
‘I tried to tell you.’
‘But you didn’t try hard enough, did you? What were you thinking?’ The lump in her throat threatened to choke her and the anger burned inside her. ‘Were you checking out whether Logan was a fit enough father? Because I can tell you now that he’s worth six of you. Logan is honest and straightforward, and if you are thinking of doing anything that will hurt my brother or his child, I will personally see you off this island.’ Breathless, she stopped, her chest rising and falling as she struggled for control.
A muscle worked in his lean cheek, an indication of his own rising tension. ‘You want me to explain so let’s start with that. You feel protective of Logan. You love him.’
‘Of course I love him.’ Her tone was both dismissive and impatient because she couldn’t understand why he was wasting time stating the obvious. ‘He’s my brother. He’s family.’
‘You make it all sound so straightforward, but life isn’t always like that, Kyla. It’s complicated.’
‘What’s complicated about telling the truth? You should have just told us. That’s what I would have done.’
Ethan swore softly and closed the distance between them. ‘Maybe it is, but I’m not like you and my family is nothing like yours.’
Kyla tried to step backwards but he caught her shoulders and forced her to look at him.
‘You want to talk about this? All right, let’s talk about it.’ His voice was raw with a depth of emotion that she hadn’t heard from him before. ‘Your family is a single unit. You’re in and out of each other’s lives, interfering and interacting. You’re individuals but you’re all small parts of a whole.’
She ignored the fact that his fingers were digging into her shoulders. ‘So? That’s what families are.’
‘Not mine.’ He released her then and his hands dropped to his sides, his tone hoarse. ‘Not mine, Kyla.’
‘I know your parents were divorced and remarried, but—’
‘You don’t know anything.’ He stared out across the sea. ‘Catherine and I didn’t share the same brother-sister relationship that you have with Logan. You love Logan. Do you want to know how I felt about Catherine? For most of my life, I hated her. There.’ He turned to look at her, a smile of self-derision on his handsome face. ‘Now are you shocked?’
She didn’t know what to say so she didn’t say anything, and he turned away again with a humourless laugh.
‘Oh, yes, you’re shocked, because hating your family isn’t something that really happens around here, is it, Kyla? Around here, on Glenmore, family is the most important thing. But the truth is that I hated Catherine. And she hated me, too. From the moment we met when I was eleven and she was eight, we hated each other. She hated me because my father married her mother and she liked it being just the two of them. It meant that she had to compete for attention. I hated her because she was the most selfish person I had ever met. She believed that the whole world had to revolve around her and it drove me mad. She took drugs, she stole, she did just about anything a person can do to gain attention. And I hated her.’
Reminding herself that he’d deceived her, Kyla tried to hold onto her anger but she felt it slipping out of her. ‘You were a child.’
‘Don’t make excuses for me. Catherine and I spent the next ten years trying to make each other miserable, and usually succeeding. We argued, we fought, we each blamed the other for our terrible home life. She was half-wild, always running away from school and driving my father mad. Three times he had to collect her from the police station—did she ever tell you that? I thought she was incredibly selfish. She thought I was aloof, remote and judgmental. We couldn’t wait to get out of each other’s lives.’
‘When did you last see her?’
‘Ten years ago.’
‘Ten years …’ Kyla tried to imagine not seeing Logan for ten years. ‘So—why did you follow her here? Why now if you didn’t have that sort of relationship?’
For a long moment Ethan didn’t answer. ‘She wrote to me, a year ago, and I realise now that it was probably just a few days before she went into labour with Kirsty. It was the only letter I ever had from her and probably the only communication we had that wasn’t tinged with bitterness. She wrote because she said that she’d discovered paradise. She told me that she’d settled in Scotland and suddenly felt different about life. She realised that family were important and she wanted to make contact. She told me that I was going to be an uncle.’
‘Did you write back?’
‘By the time I received her letter, she was already dead.’
‘But—’
‘I was working in the Sudan, Kyla. I was in Africa. I was battling heat and
