in my home.” The words burst out of him. As soon as they were said he wished he could retract them but, of course, Abby’s curiosity was obviously pricked.
“What do you mean?” she asked with a frown.
How to explain? Cade tossed around several responses. There was no easy way to say this.
“I got leave from the military because my father had a stroke and couldn’t run the ranch himself. In fact, he was on the verge of bankruptcy.” Cade licked his lips, mentally framing his explanation. “The day of Max’s funeral, Dad had a second stroke. That’s why I wasn’t there.”
“I heard.” She blinked and nodded. “Go on.”
“The stroke not only paralyzed him and took away his speech, but it left him locked inside his anger.”
“Anyone would get frustrated in such a condition,” Abby murmured.
“Trust me, he was frustrated long before he had a stroke,” Cade muttered. “My father is a very angry man. He’s been that way for as long as I can remember. It’s my fault. He hates me.”
“That can’t be true,” Abby gasped. “I’m sure your father doesn’t hate you.”
A faint smile twisted Cade’s lips. Max was the only other person he’d told his life story to and he’d shown the same reaction.
“He hates me because I killed my mother.” Why did the knowledge still hurt so much? “She died giving birth to me.”
“Oh. I’m sorry.” Abby’s hand touched his shoulder, then fluttered away. Her voice dropped. “But even so—it can’t be true. You must have confused something. He probably got so caught up in his own pain and didn’t know how—”
“No.” Cade heard the sharpness in his own voice, felt his jaw tighten. “You can’t romanticize it, Abby. Even if he was decimated by grief, it’s been over thirty years and his attitude toward me hasn’t changed one iota. His anger and the way he took it out on me for my entire life is the reason I left home and joined the military.”
He swallowed the rest of what he wanted to say. His fingers gripped the steering wheel as he turned off the highway and into Buffalo Gap. It struck him that he’d received his wish. A woman now sat beside him. The rumor mill would be rampant with speculation.
Cade with a woman? He hasn’t brought anyone to the Double L since that woman, Alice, and Ed chased her off pretty quick.
Again Cade pretended he didn’t see the curious stares. He drove stoically through the small town.
Cade didn’t get involved in Buffalo Gap. He didn’t have time for it. The constant mental battles with his father left him beaten and worn down, as did the challenge of constantly avoiding another misstep that would take the ranch to financial ruin. He didn’t have time to socialize with the townsfolk.
Max had told him once that women could sense the anger festering inside him and so they steered clear of him. Cade now knew that was true. In his life he thought he’d loved only two women and both of them had dumped him after a visit to the ranch. Cade had blamed his father’s anger and rudeness, but he knew the truth; he simply wasn’t the kind of man women cared for. He lacked the softness that having a mother would have given him. Now Cade no longer wanted the complication of romance in his already uncomfortable world.
But with sudden awareness, he now realized that to expect Abby to endure the simmering discontent of his father was a bad idea. She said she had a little more than three months to go before the twins were due; three months in which she should be pampered and soothed to prepare for delivery. Cade was no expert on human birth, of course, but he’d helped deliver hundreds of calves and about the same number of colts, and he knew giving birth was hard work for any mom.
“Cade?” The softly voiced query drew his attention to Abby. “I don’t have to stay on your ranch. I could go to my friend’s or a shelter, if that would be better for you. I don’t want to cause you problems.”
“You can’t stay in a shelter. Max would never have allowed it and neither will I.” Admiration for her pluck drove off the brooding that always enveloped him when he thought of his father. Cade focused instead on the small woman in the opposite seat.
“But I need to prepare you for what you’ll find. And I want to ask you to, as much as possible, avoid my father. He’s very unhappy with the way I’ve been managing the ranch and with the decisions I’ve made. He refuses to work at his physiotherapy. He often won’t eat the meals our housekeeper, Mrs. Swanson, prepares. He deliberately knocks things over and bangs his cane against anything to express his anger.”
“Oh, the poor man.” Abby’s eyes welled with tears. For some reason that made Cade very angry.
“He’s not a poor man. He’s unhappy, as he’s always been, and he’s trying to make everyone else feel the same.” Cade had to force his fingers to relax on the steering wheel as he drove the gravel road toward the ranch. “I have only one rule for your stay on the Double L, Abby. You must avoid my father. I won’t risk anything happening to you or to Max’s babies.”
Abby’s eyes widened before she turned to look out the window. Cade hated the worry he’d glimpsed there, but he was issuing the warning for her sake.
“Maybe I should go somewhere else—” she began.
“I’ve made you afraid.” He cut off whatever else she’d been going to say, mentally stewing over his lack of subtlety. “Don’t be afraid, Abby. Physically, you will be perfectly safe at the ranch.” He used the gentlest voice he could muster but mostly Cade was out of touch with gentleness.
“But you said—”
“My father has never deliberately physically harmed Mrs. Swanson or me. He uses words instead.” Cade pushed ahead with his confession. “His negative state can be very depressing. I don’t want you to be depressed or unhappy. For that reason I want you to avoid him, as much for your sake as for his.”
Cade pulled up in front of the big white farmhouse that had been home for his entire life. He switched off the truck. Then he turned to look at Abby. She returned his stare, her clear gaze direct and unflinching. Her hands smoothed over her bulging stomach in a protective shield before she spoke.
“I’m here as your guest, Cade. I’ll do whatever you ask. I don’t want to cause any problems for you or your father.” She smiled and Cade noticed the faint trace of dimples in her cheeks. “I’ll try not to be a bother to anyone.”
“You could never be that, Abby. Just be advised. Don’t expect a nice, kindly old man. He’s not.”
Clearly she didn’t believe him. Abby was sweet and good, everything he’d missed from life, everything he craved but couldn’t have. He tore his thoughts away from that thinking and turned his attention to the front window. His father sat there, watching. Cade knew the time for talking was past.
“Welcome to the Double L, Abby.” He climbed out of his truck, walked around to the other side and opened her door. “I’ll introduce you to my father and Mrs. Swanson. Then you can settle in.”
“Thank you.” She held out her hand so he could help her down, letting out a tiny squeal of surprise when he simply lifted her and set her on her feet
