by his own boldness, Jeff knew he couldn’t back down now. He’d never done more than shake hands with another agent, yet here he was tussling with one after meeting her mere days ago. His only excuse was that since the first moment he’d seen Tish Buckner, he’d been able to think about little else.
He’d been expecting her temper, perhaps a struggle, even possibly a kick in the shins followed by a hard slap. After all, she’d warned him twice to keep his hands to himself. Instead, she stiffened for several long seconds, holding herself rigid. Jeff ignored that and tried to coax her lips to respond while his hands at her back kneaded and caressed. Just when he was about to give up and give her this round, her lips began to move, to answer.
She opened to him, allowing his tongue entry to the secrets of her mouth, while her arms raised and enfolded him. White-hot passion exploded in a flash of heat, its intensity so unexpected that he nearly lost his footing. Her mouth was so soft, so giving and he drank from her like a desert walker who’d just found water. Her body was small and firm, and suddenly straining to get closer, the sweet friction driving him crazy.
Shaken, Jeff drew back, breathing hard.
Tish stared up at him, her eyes luminous in the dim lighting, looking as if she were fighting some internal demons, and losing the battle. She drew in a deep breath, yet it didn’t seem to calm her. Then, in an act that mimicked his, she grabbed his shirt front and pulled him to her, kissing him with an urgency that set his blood to boiling. There was no surrender in her kiss, but rather an acknowledgment of a need that perfectly matched his. She held him close, lost in passion newly awakened.
Just that quickly, Jeff began to fall over the edge and into love. How long had he subconsciously wanted and waited for such a woman? he wondered in the sluggish part of his brain still able to think. The scent and feel and taste of her wiped out the memory of every other woman he’d ever touched. His hands were trapped in the thickness of her hair as her sweet feminine fragrance wrapped around him. How could he have known she’d taste like all his wild dreams, exotic yet romantic at the same time? How could he have guessed she was the other half of him, just waiting to be found?
This time it was Tish who drew away, taking a step back, lowering her head and trying to regain control. Jeff ran a hand through his hair, unnerved to find it unsteady. He’d been wanting to kiss her, hoping to interest her, but even in his reckless dreams, he hadn’t expected either of them to react quite so fervently.
He saw Tish shake her head as if to clear her mind. He thought he ought to say something, though he wasn’t sure what that should be.
“Look, I…”
“No,” she said, “let me.” Eyes downcast, she seemed to search for the right words. “I—I obviously didn’t expect that to happen or that I’d—I’d—”
“Feel so much?” he offered.
Slowly, she lifted her eyes to his. “Yes, exactly. All the more reason why I need to keep my distance from you. I don’t have time for whatever it is you have in mind. SPEAR is very important to me and—”
“It’s important to me, too. But the attraction we feel for one another has nothing to do with SPEAR.”
As if she hadn’t heard, she went on. “SPEAR keeps me focused, grounded, and I need that. I don’t need a fling or a thing.”
Jeff decided to backtrack a bit, thinking perhaps he’d rushed her. “Why don’t we aim for friendship and see where that takes us?” Although he knew he was already light-years past a mere friendship.
Tish studied his face, then shook her head. “No, friendship isn’t what you have in mind. I can see it in your eyes. I’ve noticed for days now that you’ve been watching me and I know what you’re thinking.”
Caught between amusement and curiosity, he stepped closer. “Just what is it you think I want?”
She was quiet, thoughtful, then raised her chin. “More. More than I have to give.”
Jeff thought that over for a few seconds. “Someone hurt you badly, didn’t they?” he asked softly.
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Bad enough.”
“So you’re not going to let anyone get close enough to do it again. Is that about it?” When she didn’t reply, he had his answer. Again he invaded her space just enough so she had to look up at him. “What makes you think I’d hurt you, Tish?”
She gave him a long look. “Because you’re someone I could care for. Only people we care for can truly hurt us.”
Jeff wanted to ask who had hurt her, what had happened, but he didn’t want her to close up and back away. She’d admitted she could care for him. He’d work from there. There’d be time for questions later.
He disentangled her arms and took her hands on his. “I won’t hurt you. I swear. Let me prove it to you.”
She closed her eyes, as if fighting her own needs. “Please, Jeff. This can’t go anywhere.”
He smiled then, hoping to lighten her mood. “Honey, it already has.”
She took a deep breath, drawing courage. “No, I’m serious. I can’t get involved.”
His heart lurched. This didn’t sound like good news. “Are you going to tell me you’re married?” Naomi Star at the front desk had said Tish was single, but she could have been mistaken. The man who’d hurt her, was she still involved with him?
She stared into his eyes as the seconds ticked by. “Would it make a difference if I were?”
He didn’t answer her. Instead, he shifted her closer. “You couldn’t be happily married and kiss me like you just did.” But he waited, his breath backing up in his throat.
“You’re right about that and no, I’m not married,” she said at last.
Jeff visibly relaxed. “Then what? What’s wrong?”
She found the middle button of his shirt fascinating as she tried to tell him. “After you left, I talked privately to Slim and asked him a couple of questions about you. I wanted to know some things and—”
“I thought you were going to play chess with Wonder Boy.”
“I begged off from that.”
“Good move.” He squeezed her arms. “I don’t mind if you talked with Slim. I have nothing to hide. Did he say something that upset you?”
“Not really upset me, it’s just that he told me you’ve got a couple of years of residency to go yet and I’m sent all over the world by SPEAR. I don’t think long distance relationships work well and I’m committed to my work.”
“I’m committed to SPEAR, too. I don’t see what that has to do with anything.” Domino chose that moment to give out with a loud whinny. “See, he doesn’t either.”
“No, wait, Jeff, I—”
“No, Tish, you wait.” He leaned down, his face inches from hers. “When I kissed you just now, when you kissed me back, tell me honestly how you felt, and remember, Domino’s listening.”
