back off. This was little Rebecca he was thinking about—the Rebecca he’d always thought of as a kid sister. She undoubtedly still considered him a big brother. That was why she felt free to lecture him, just the way she would lecture Quinn. She’d never think of him any other way.
He couldn’t possibly be attracted to her. He saw again those golden-brown eyes, warming with a smile for him, and felt a jolt that had nothing brotherly about it. Okay, maybe he could be attracted to her, but he wasn’t going to do anything about it.
Nothing about a relationship with Rebecca could be at all casual, and he knew it, so there wasn’t going to be anything. The future he had mapped out for himself didn’t include the possibility of marriage for a long time. He travels fastest who travels alone—and he intended to keep moving.
So he’d ignore the surge of attraction he felt every time he saw Rebecca. Given the way she felt about him right now, that shouldn’t be difficult. She’d be only too happy to ignore him.
He pulled into a parking space in front of the Bluebird Café, switched off the ignition and took a deep breath. Telling Rebecca he wasn’t staying had been difficult enough. Telling Doc seemed almost impossible.
He got out and stood for a moment. The setting sun edged behind the mountain, sending streaks of orange along the horizon, softening slowly to purple. He’d forgotten how quickly twilight came in the narrow valley, closing in as the sun disappeared.
It had been a long time since he’d stood still and watched the sun go down. Peaceful. He could use some of that peace right now, as he prepared to break the news to Doc. He turned, pushed open the door, and saw Doc waiting at a table in the back.
The opportunity he needed didn’t come immediately. Doc had already consulted the cardiologist who’d seen Minna at the hospital, and he clearly wanted to talk about his diagnosis and treatment plan. It wasn’t until Doc had scooped the last bit of chicken gravy onto his roll and popped it in his mouth that he began to run out of shoptalk.
Finally Doc pushed his plate aside and propped his elbows on the red-and-white checked tablecloth. He peered at Brett over the top of the glasses that constantly slid down his nose, his faded blue eyes intent.
“Okay, out with it.”
Brett discovered he was clutching the checked napkin like a lifeline. “What do you mean?”
Doc lifted his eyebrows. “You think I’m so old I can’t tell when something’s wrong with you?”
“No, I guess not.” Some of his tension slipped away. “I’ve been working up my nerve to tell you something.”
“Wouldn’t have anything to do with a difference of opinion you got into with a supervising physician, would it?”
He hoped his mouth wasn’t hanging open. “How did you know that?”
Doc shrugged. “I still have my sources. You want to talk about it?”
The café was empty except for them, and Cassie James, the owner, after checking at least three times to be sure they had everything, had retired to the kitchen.
“There’s not much to tell.” Brett frowned, studying the bluebird on the heavy white coffee mug. He didn’t want it to sound as if he were making excuses for himself. “I was doing an ER rotation, and the paramedics brought in a street person in pretty bad shape. Standard procedure was to send them to county, but I felt she wouldn’t stand the trip. I scheduled her for surgery.” He took a breath, remembering. “Dr. Barrett didn’t agree, and I had to go over his head.”
“Were you right?”
He reached inside himself for the answer. Was he right? “Yes.”
Doc nodded sharply. “Then that’s what matters. Forget Barrett. He’s not as important as he thinks he is.”
“Unfortunately he’s important enough to control who gets the surgical fellowship. And it’s not going to be me.”
He met Doc’s gaze, and saw instant sympathy reflected there, followed by a sudden spark of hope. He had to get the rest of it out before Doc could build too much on his words.
“Doc, I know we used to say I’d come back here after my training and take over the clinic so you could retire.” He found his throat closing. How could he say that the life Doc loved wasn’t the one he wanted?
Doc looked away, seeming to stare out the window that overlooked Main Street. When he looked back at Brett, there was no condemnation in his face—just understanding. “Your dreams have changed.”
He nodded. “Yes, I guess they have.” His voice sounded husky, even to himself, and his throat felt tight. “I didn’t realize then what possibilities there are in medicine. Now…”
“Now you want something more.” Doc rearranged his cup and saucer, his hand trembling slightly. “Can’t say I’m surprised. I guess I always figured you might discover talents you didn’t know you had.”
“I don’t want to let you down.” The strength of that feeling surprised him. “I’d never want to disappoint you. I’ll repay every cent you loaned me. But I’d like to try for another surgical fellowship.”
There, it was out.
Doc didn’t say anything for a long moment. Then he smiled. “Any program head who doesn’t take you is a fool.” He reached out to clasp Brett’s hand. “You’re going to make us all proud, son.”
“But you—”
“I’m not ready to retire yet,” Doc said quickly. “The right person will come along to take over the clinic long before I’m ready to hang it up. Shoot, what would I do if I quit? Chase a little white ball around a golf course? Not for me.”
“You might get to like it.”
“I like what I’m doing now just fine.” Doc shoved his sleeve back to glance at his watch. “Speaking of which, I’d better get on the road to the hospital. Minna’s expecting to see me.”
“I’ll pay you back, you know. I mean it.”
Doc shook his head. “Help someone else instead.” He put his hand on Brett’s shoulder. “It’s all right, Brett. You’re not letting me down.”
It was one thing to hear Doc say the words. It was quite another to believe them. Brett watched Doc make his way to the door, stop to exchange some joking words with Cassie, then go out. His shoulders were stooped, his walk almost a shuffle.
Pain gripped Brett’s heart. It wasn’t all right. Even if he didn’t intend to settle down in Bedford Creek for the rest of his life, he couldn’t just walk away. Somehow, he had to do something.
Rebecca sat on the front porch swing, watching the stars come out one by one in the sliver of sky that wasn’t blocked by the maple trees lining the street. She should go in. She shivered, pulling her sweater more closely around her shoulders. Nights got cool in the mountains in September.
She glanced across the lawn to the house next door. She might as well admit it. She was waiting for Brett to come home from his meeting with Doc.
She’d
