shut off his thoughts with a snap. He could not show his admiration. After all, if Jane saw him weaken, then she might, too.
“Glad to hear it.” He gave a brief nod and followed his sister out the door.
* * *
Why had she promised John Reed that she could come up with a sketch by morning? Nan scrubbed her hand wearily over her forehead. Because he goaded you, that’s why. She longed to wipe that smug expression off his handsome face. Handsome? She shook her head. Whether he was good-looking or not had nothing to do with her current misery. Since the pair had left her shop just a few hours ago, she’d done nothing but ponder over the lines of Jane Reed’s simple gown, trying to come up with an idea that would set Jane’s small but regal bearing off to perfection.
The clock on the mantelpiece chimed seven o’clock. She was due to have supper with Paul, Becky, Susannah and Daniel over at Kellridge Hall in less than an hour. In fact, Susannah and Daniel would come by in the carriage sooner than that. As a spinster, Nan had to rely on her wealthy wedded sisters’ largesse when it came to transportation. The shop, even at its most profitable, had not allowed Nan the funds to buy her own horse and buggy.
Nan heaved a gusty sigh. What a day it had been, and it wasn’t over just yet. Not only was she creatively stymied, but she needed to put her frustration aside and pretend to enjoy yet another interminable family dinner.
Not that she hated her family.
It was just so difficult, watching her lovely older sisters with their doting husbands. Susannah’s small son would likely stay behind in the nursery, but her sister Becky would be there, her pregnancy just beginning to show under the high waist of her voluminous skirts. All her life, Nan had followed the path that seemed predestined for her, as the youngest, plainest and most sensible of the trio of Siddons sisters. She would be the one with a practical head for business. When her tempestuous sister Susannah finally surrendered to Daniel Hale’s charm, she’d left the shop behind for Nan and Becky. However, Becky was far too impulsive and romantic for such a prosaic occupation, and soon fled the millinery shop to become Paul Holmes’s wife.
As the business at the shop settled, it created a pleasant enough rhythm for Nan’s life. She thought she could be satisfied with the lot she was handed. Even when Becky told her of her pregnancy, Nan fought back a rising tide of jealousy. She was simply never meant to be a wife or a mother.
Once the village shop engaged the French milliner and her business began its sudden plummet—well, that was another matter entirely. Here she was, alone and with only her business to support her. She was beginning to question whether or not she even liked hats, which was entirely beside the point. Nan Siddons was the practical woman of the family, and managing the millinery shop was her destiny.
What would happen to her if the business failed? She clenched the foolscap and breathed deeply.
I know we are supposed to trust in You, God. Just please, please, please—don’t let the shop crash.
Nan tossed the sheet of foolscap aside and sprinted upstairs, as though she could outrun the depressing thought of being a spinster aunt, a hanger-on, a charity case in one of her sisters’ grand homes. Quick as a wink, she changed into a somber silk evening dress and washed her face.
She must look as pulled-together as possible. No need for her sisters to guess that her world might just tumble down around her ears.
The sound of the carriage crunching on the gravel outside caused her to scurry down the stairs. She grabbed her shawl, winding it tightly about her shoulders as she rushed out the door. Why was she in a hurry? She couldn’t very well outrun her own troubling thoughts.
Daniel was standing outside the carriage, ready to help her up. It was a particular trait of his, a brotherly gesture, as he wouldn’t let the footmen do the job for him.
Nan smiled wanly at him as he held out his hand.
“I do hope you can manage a happier expression than that, Nan,” Susannah scolded as Nan made her way into the carriage. “It’s more than just family tonight. Becky and Daniel are entertaining guests. We must make them feel welcome here in Tansley.”
“Guests?” Nan arranged her skirts carefully about her as her stomach sank.
“Yes.” Daniel clambered inside, tugging the door shut behind him. “An old friend of Paul’s, and his sister.”
Oh, no. Surely not. Nan breathed carefully in and out. She was barely able to force herself to attend a family dinner tonight, but if the guests were whom she thought they were—
“The Reeds.” Susannah tugged on her glove as Daniel rapped on the window of the coach. The carriage started forward with a low rumble. “John Reed, and his sister, Jane.”
“I daresay you’ll enjoy meeting my sister-in-law, even though she can be a little trying,” Paul Holmes muttered from his place by the hearth. “She’s got a fine head for business, but it’s difficult to get her to talk about much else. You won’t find her much of a dinner partner.”
John shrugged. He didn’t really want to spoil the surprise by telling Paul about meeting Miss Siddons earlier in the day. No, it would be much more fun to play dumb until she walked back in the door. “Why won’t she talk about much else?” He might as well find out a little more about her while they were waiting for her to arrive. It would, at least, distract them from the real purpose of his visit. Learning how to be a proper master was certainly no stroll down Rotten Row.
“I spent some time with Nan and with my wife, Becky, before even Susannah and Daniel were wed. Picnics, games, that kind of sport. Nan’s all right. A bit practical, mind you, but a good girl of a fine Christian family. Of course, my mind is always taken up with my wife—even before I knew I was in love with Becky, I spent as much time with her as I could.”
“Even to the point of hiring her as your niece’s nursemaid?” John couldn’t suppress a roguish grin.
Paul eyed him sharply over the rim of his teacup. “Watch yourself, man. As I said, the Siddonses are above reproach, particularly where the finer points of morality are concerned.”
“I don’t intend to imply anything unseemly. Beg pardon.” John choked back his gleeful grin. It never failed to amuse him that he’d discovered Paul’s feelings for Becky before the man himself knew them to be true.
“As I was saying,” Paul continued, with the air of a man being robbed of all patience, “I concentrated my thoughts upon Becky. Susannah was, of course, already spoken for by Daniel. Nan was a bit of a gooseberry, I suppose. She is younger, too, than her sisters. I suppose she maintains her pretense of practicality, and devotes herself to her work, as a way of proving herself worthy.”
“Worthy of what?” John desperately wished for a before-dinner sherry, but there was not a drop to be had at Kellridge Hall. Now that Paul had changed his entire life around and found, as he said, the Lord, anything that led to debauchery had been banned from the Hall, including liquor.
“I don’t know exactly what. All I can tell you is that Nan is seeking to prove herself just as her sisters did before her. She lacks Susannah’s fire and Becky’s beauty and grace. But there’s a charm about her all the same, for all her plainspokenness. Once, Daniel told
