she didn’t care if he did this a lot, he was doing it to her, right now, and he could go on doing it for ever, it was so divine. He stroked her back to life, cajoled her hibernating clitoris from its dreamless sleep, and it stretched and peeked out and Izzy was sure this feeling must end, that she’d shift or he’d pause and that the magic would stop, and she didn’t want it to.
She couldn’t lean back because she didn’t want to.
She couldn’t reach for the sides of the bath because then she couldn’t hold him.
She held his shirt-clad back with wet arms and muffled her face in his neck and beneath the cologne that he was wearing tonight was the true scent of him, the one that every cell in her body had flared for on sight and burnt now with direct contact.
Let go, his fingers insisted. Let go, the stubble of his chin told her eyelids as she pressed her face into him. She could hear the lap, lap, lap of the water and the patience yet relentlessness of him and she did as his fingers told her, she didn’t know what she said and she didn’t know what she did—she just let go. She was almost climbing out of the bath and into his arms, but he held her down and it was so much better than being just friends. And as she opened her eyes he closed his; as he struggled to get through the next nine seconds, Izzy was wondering how they’d get through the next nine weeks. She wanted more of him.
‘We’re going to be late.’ He was trying to sound normal.
Really, really late, because Izzy now had to sort out her hair and do her make-up and show him where the ironing board was so he could iron his shirt dry.
But it was more than worth it.
SHE had known heads would turn and they did, but what Izzy hadn’t expected were the smiles that followed the arches of the eyebrows as they walked in together.
Real smiles, because how could they not?
Izzy had been through so very much and her friends and colleagues had been worried about her, had not known how to react in the face of such raw pain and grief, but tonight she was glowing and it wasn’t just from the pregnancy.
‘Don’t you dare say you’re just friends, because I won’t believe you.’ Megan came over as Diego went to the bar. ‘Friends,’ Megan said, ‘are able to go two minutes without eye contact,’ she pointed out as she caught Izzy and Diego share a lingering look from across the room. ‘Friends don’t light up a room with their energy when they walk in. Friends don’t cause every head to turn. Friends, my foot...’ Megan laughed.
‘Okay, ‘Izzy said, and though it was all a bit like a runaway train, she felt exhilarated as she rode it, smiled as she said it: ‘We’re more than friends.’
‘Happy?’ Megan checked.
‘Very.’
‘Then I’m happy for you,’ Megan said. Izzy was sure she would have loved to have said more, but sometimes good friends didn’t. Sometimes good friends had to let you make your own success or mistakes and be there for you whatever the outcome. Megan confirmed that with her next words.
‘I’m always here.’
‘I know that.’
‘So how did you manage the night off? I thought you were on.’
‘No.’ Izzy shook her head, ‘I told you, I’m only doing days till the baby’s born. I thought you were on call?’
‘Richard didn’t want to come to the ball, so he’s covering for me,’ Megan said. ‘So who’s holding the fort in A and E tonight?’
‘Mitch,’ Izzy said.
‘He’s only a resident.’
‘Oh, Ben is on call, said he might pop in if he can get away....’ And her voice trailed off, because Izzy realised then that Megan hadn’t actually been enquiring about her roster, she had been fishing to find out the whereabouts of someone else. And as Megan stood and kissed Izzy on the cheek and headed off into the throng of people, Izzy found a corner of an unexpected jigsaw.
She could see Megan, her usually pale cheeks, suddenly flushed and pink, desperately trying to focus on a conversation, but her green eyes kept flicking over to Josh. It was as if there were an invisible thread between them, a thread that tightened. She watched as Josh worked the room, each greeting, each two-minute conversation seemed to be dragging him on a human Mexican wave towards Megan. The pull was so strong, Izzy could have sworn she could have reached out and grabbed it.
And then it snapped.
Izzy watched as a blonde woman walked over, all smiles, and kissed Josh possessively on the lips. Izzy saw the wedding band glint on her finger and as Megan’s face turned away, Izzy knew Megan had just seen it too.
‘Excuse me...’ All the colour had drained out of Megan’s face and she walked quickly to the ladies. Izzy looked over at Josh who was concentrating on something his wife was saying, but then he caught her eye and Izzy couldn’t read his expression, but something told her it was a plea to help.
‘Here...’ Diego was back with the drinks and it was Izzy’s turn to excuse herself, but by the time she got to the ladies Megan was on her way out.
‘Hey?’ Izzy smiled. ‘Are you okay?’
‘I’m great!’ Megan gave a dazzling smile. ‘It’s always a good night.’
‘Megan?’ Izzy caught her friend’s arm, but Megan shook it off.
‘I must get back out there.’
Oh, she wanted to know what was going on, to help, to fix, to share, only it was clear all Megan wanted to do was to get through this night.
‘Sit with us,’ Izzy suggested. ‘I thought we would be with the emergency guys and girls or NICU, but we left the booking too late and we’re with the maternity mob. Come and keep us company.’ It was the best she could do for Megan right now and when Megan jumped at the suggestion, Izzy knew she had been right.
There was something going on with Megan and Josh.
Or, Izzy pondered, there had been.
It was actually a good night—the food was wonderful, the company great. Diego was clearly a hit with the maternity team as well, but as the table was cleared and the dancing commenced Izzy was uncomfortable all of a sudden in the hard chair. Stretching her spine, she shifted her weight and she was glad to stretch her legs when Diego asked her to dance.
It was such bliss to be in his arms.
To smell him, to be held by him.
She wished the music would last for ever—that somehow she could freeze this moment of time, where there was no past to run from and no future that could change things. She wished she could dance and dance, just hold this moment and forever feel his breath on her neck and his warm hands on her back, to feel the bulge of her pregnant stomach pressed to his and to remember...
She was dizzy almost remembering
