When she sat, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and she relished his warmth. “You want the guy to treat you like you’re special. Be gentle with you. Never coming on too strong, okay?”
She nodded. Taking mental notes. “Got it.”
Then Cole had caressed a cheek with his thumb and cupped the back of her neck under her hair and angled her head. Her heart was thundering so loud, she could barely hear him when he spoke.
“Okay. I’m pretending it’s not you, Jamison.”
Her first kiss had turned molten hot in seconds as he schooled her in how to kiss. How she should expect to be touched. Everything had been so gentle, passionate, and she wanted more.
Blood rushing in her head and heart hammering, she’d decided to take matters into her own hands. She pulled back, and he frowned but let her go easily. “Are you okay?”
At first all she could manage was a nod. But then she blurted. “Yeah, but I want you to really kiss me. I know you’re holding back.”
Cole tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “Jamison. You don’t want—”
“Yes, I do. Or some other guy is going to teach me and he won’t have my best interest at heart...” When it looked like he might not kiss her properly, she pushed herself into a crouch and levered herself onto his lap facing him. “Please show me.”
“I—” Then he sighed and kissed her again. The second time around hadn’t been quite so gentle. His lips had been far more urgent, his hand skimming up her tank top to run his thumbs just over her ribs. The tease of his thumb over each ridge sent a shiver through her body.
His hand clamped on her hips and he set the tempo of the kiss and their rocking bodies.
The sensations zipping through her body weren’t just new. Try explosive and mind changing. She knew she couldn’t go back. Not to boring, bland her. Not when she knew it was possible to feel this way.
The tingles wrapped around her spinal chord tight and forced her muscles to bunch. Forced her body to arch, searching for...something.
Cole kissed her deep. His hand on her hip moving her until their bodies rocked into each other again and again. But then he threw his head back against the wall and tucked her against him.
She’d tried to ask him why he stopped. Or what she’d done wrong. The evidence of his arousal was hard to miss. And the idea that she’d managed to excite him was heady. But when she tried to talk, he hushed her, then held her for what felt like an eternity.
They didn’t move until the sounds of the party were in full swing. Then he’d gently lifted her away. His motions stiff and jerky. “You okay?”
She lied as smoothly as she could. “Yeah, I’m fine. You?”
“To tell you the truth, I have no idea.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t—”
He’d kissed her forehead then. “You have zero reason to be sorry. None. Let’s go.”
He’d taken her out of the closet and it seemed like everyone had forgotten the game. She left that room with him feeling anxious and curious. But the longing was most prevalent.
That party had marked the beginning of winter break. And considering her parents had dragged them to Saint Louis that Christmas, she hadn’t seen him again until the following January.
And then it was like it never happened. She wasn’t sure exactly how these things should go, but he was silent. The weird part was, he ignored everyone. Quit track, didn’t run soccer and left all his academic clubs. She’d easily made valedictorian after that. Not exactly how she’d wanted to do it. It was obvious something was wrong. But the one time she’d tried to approach him, he’d looked through her. Like she didn’t exist. She hadn’t tried again. And now, he was playing savior to her damsel in distress? How the heck was she supposed to survive a day with him, let alone ten days?
Jamie was a Christmas-decorating expert. A pro short on time, so, she did the basics. Stuck some battery-operated candles in the windows, put up the wreaths. Strung some garlands and pinned a few snowflakes to the ceiling. She pulled out the nativity scene to place under the tree.
It only took her about an hour after the tree had arrived. The whole time Cole had been absent. She hadn’t seen a glimpse of him since he’d brought her in. After she was done, she settled in to get some work done. Working, for her, was like going into another zone. She didn’t even like people around because it messed with her flow too much. She usually employed noise-canceling headphones and played nature sounds. She changed to music once she got her groove. Today, for sure, called for Christmas music.
After picking her spot on the couch, and setting up the router configuration, she was pretty much up and running. She was so deep into issues to mark for fixing that she didn’t notice when Cole had come out from one of the rooms down the other hallway.
It wasn’t until his shadow loomed over her that she snapped her head up.
When she jumped he grinned. Tugging the noise cancelers off, she smiled sheepishly. “Sorry about that. When I’m working I go total focus mode.”
“Yeah, I caught that. I’ve been trying to get your attention for five minutes. Of course that was before I realized you’d gone into la-la land or whatever.” He glanced around. “I see you were dead serious about decorating. Looks like a Christmas vortex in here.”
“Bah humbug, Scrooge.” She rolled her eyes. “I can’t believe you don’t get into Christmas.” Shoot, unless he was Jewish. “Damn, I didn’t even ask if your family even celebrated Christmas. Maybe you do Hanukkah or Kwanzaa or something and here I am with my nativity scenes.”
He coughed a laugh. “No, we did Christmas. It was a pretty big deal in my house, the hot cocoa, ice-skating on Christmas Eve. The whole thing.”
She frowned as she looked up at him. “So what happened? Did an elf scare you when you went to sit on Santa’s lap one year?”
A shadow crossed over his face and for a moment, he looked so vulnerable and lost. But then it was gone and he cleared his throat. “Nah, I’m just grown now. I know there’s no such thing as Santa Claus.”
She hadn’t imagined it. There was a shadow of pain behind his eyes, but he didn’t seem interested in talking about it. Of course, to someone like her, that just made her want to ferret it out and fix the bug. The defective code. Right the imperfection. Not your business.
So instead, she just said, “What? I refuse to believe there’s no Santa. I insist on believing in the jolly man with the beard and Rudolph. Except in my mind, Santa looks like a male model, and has a six-pack.”
The hint of a smile was back on his lips. “You want to interview for Mrs. Claus, then?”
She laughed. “I don’t do relationships.” At least not anymore. “Just like you don’t do Christmas.”
“Fair
