was going to be a mother.
She clenched her eyes shut and willed the tears away. What kind of mother would she be? Her ex and her family told her over and over she tended to be flighty and irresponsible. A baby meant responsibility, stability.
What if it turned out they were right? She certainly hadn’t demonstrated good judgment on the night of her reunion.
The thought sliced her to the core and she took a deep breath. No time to cry. Not when she had a shop to open in a few minutes. Beth Gatica, her friend and employee, was already downstairs. She swiped at her eyes, tried to think.
“Where do I start?” she wondered aloud, trying to get her head clear enough to think.
A doctor. She’d need a doctor. Her usual doctor happened to be a friend of her family’s, so she’d definitely have to head over to Traverse City. Since she felt better with something to do, she reached for the phone book.
“Lainey?” Beth’s voice came through the door connecting the apartment to the shop. “Are you okay?”
Lainey fumbled the phone book and caught sight of herself in the small mirror next to the door. Dark blond hair already escaping from her ponytail? Check. Dark circles under her eyes? Check. Pasty skin? Yikes. Wasn’t there supposed to be some kind of pregnancy glow? “I’m fine,” she called. “Be right there.”
“Okay, good. Because we’ve got a problem.”
Well, of course they did. Lainey marched over and yanked open the door, almost grateful for the distraction. “What kind of problem?”
“Come see.” Beth turned and hurried down the stairs, long dark curls bouncing. The fresh, cool scent of flowers hit Lainey as they entered the workroom. Beth tipped her head toward the older of the two walk-in coolers. “It’s not cold enough, Laine. It’s set where it’s supposed to be, but it’s nearly twelve degrees warmer in there.”
“Oh, no.” No. She needed the cooler to last another year—like she needed the van with its iffy transmission to last another six months. Preferably twelve. A headache began to pulse at the edges of her brain at the thought of her nearly empty bank account. Using only one cooler would mean reducing inventory, which meant possibly not being able to meet the needs of her customers. Which meant less income. And she couldn’t afford to lose a single cent at this point.
To say The Lily Pad operated on a shoestring budget was to put it optimistically.
She pulled open the door, even though she didn’t doubt Beth. She could feel the difference as soon as she walked in. She tapped the thermostat with her finger. Maybe it was stuck somewhere? She should be so lucky.
“Call Gary at General Repair,” she said to Beth. “See if he can get us in today.”
“On it.” Beth hurried to the phone.
Lainey headed to the working cooler to do some rearranging. Some of the more delicate flowers would have to be moved over.
She tamped down the spurt of fear and worry that threatened to explode. No point inviting trouble, and Lainey figured she had enough to fill her personal quota. She closed her eyes and inhaled the fresh, green scent of the flowers, with their overtones of sweet and tangy and spicy. It always, always relaxed her just to breathe in the flowers.
But not enough, today, to rid her of her worries. About choking coolers. About babies. Lainey smothered a sigh. If she’d stayed home two months ago part of her predicament wouldn’t be here. She’d invited trouble. Or, more accurately, trouble had invited her.
Of course she hadn’t turned him down.
“Gary will be here at eleven,” Beth said from behind her. “Want me to help move things?”
Lainey glanced at her watch. An hour and a half. “Sure. We’ll just move a few for now. Let’s group them by the door so we can open it a minimum of times.” The colder it stayed in there, the better for her bottom line. She couldn’t afford to lose a cooler full of flowers.
“Are you okay, Laine? You’re awfully pale,” Beth commented as she lifted a bucket of carnations out of the way.
Lainey sucked in a breath. Should she tell Beth? They’d been friends for years. Beth wouldn’t ridicule her for her mistake with Jon. It would feel so good to tell someone….
“Lainey?” Beth’s head was cocked, her brown gaze worried. “What’s going on?”
“I’m pregnant,” she blurted, and burst into tears. Beth hurried over to her, nearly knocking a bucket over in the process.
“Honey, are you sure?”
Lainey nodded and swiped at the tears. “Pretty sure.” Five separate pink lines couldn’t be wrong. Could they? “I’ll have to go to a doctor to confirm it, though.”
“Oh, Laine.” Beth hugged her, stepped back. “How far along? I didn’t know you were seeing someone.”
Lainey closed her eyes. Here we go. “Well, I’m actually not. I’m about eight weeks along.” She’d let Beth do the math.
“So that’s—oh.” Beth drew out the word and her eyes rounded. “Your class reunion.”
“Yeah.” Lainey couldn’t meet her friend’s gaze. Her poor baby. How could she ever explain the circumstances of his or her conception?
“So who’s the daddy?”
“Jon Meier.” Lainey could barely say his name. “We … ah … hit it off pretty well.”
Beth gave a wry chuckle and opened the cooler door, a load of calla lilies in her hands. “So it seems.”
“I have to tell him, Beth, but he lives so far away. Plus the whole thing was pretty forgettable, if you know what I mean. We used protection, but obviously …” She shrugged and swiped at her leaking eyes again. “It didn’t work.” An understatement if she’d ever heard one.
“He’s not father material?”
“I don’t know.” It wasn’t as if they’d discussed things like personal lives. “Plus he lives in LA. He’s in some kind of entertainment industry work. He’s not going to pull up and move back to Northern Michigan.” He’d made his contempt for the area crystal-clear.
“Sometimes having a kid changes that,” Beth pointed out.
“True.” Lainey didn’t want to think about it. “But I think we were pretty much in agreement on how awkward the whole thing was.” So much for sex with no strings attached. The baby in her belly was a pretty long string. The length of a lifetime, in fact.
She wanted to bang her head on the wall. What had she been thinking, leaving with Jon that night? Was her self-esteem so damaged by her divorce she had to jump on the first guy who smiled at her?
Best not to answer that.
“I think you’ll be a wonderful mom,” Beth said, and Lainey’s throat tightened.
“Really?” She couldn’t keep the wobble out
