here and what he wanted? In a small town like Beesdale, it was hard to keep anything secret—everyone knew that he had run out on her and left her pregnant. Now the thought of her daughter helped to steady her. No way was she going to allow Callum to destroy Beatrix’s life the way he had destroyed hers!
She turned cold hazel eyes on him. ‘Come outside. We can’t talk in here.’
She didn’t wait to see if he was following as she led the way out of the church. It was up to Callum what he did and she had no intention of trying to influence him in any way. She walked down the path, only pausing when she reached the lich gate. There was very little traffic about as most of the townspeople were in the church. Polly was the local midwife and greatly loved; everyone wanted to help her celebrate her special day. Tears suddenly pricked her eyes but Beth blinked them away. She wasn’t going to think about the dreams she’d had when she and Callum had married. That was all in the past and too much had happened since. Their divorce had been difficult enough, but the fact that he hadn’t even bothered to acknowledge their child until today was so much worse.
‘I’m sorry. I know it isn’t enough but I am truly sorry, Beth.’
There was a note in his deep voice that tugged at her heart strings before she pulled herself together. If she gave in and allowed her emotions free rein then she would regret it. She had to focus on the facts, highlight them in neon-bright letters so she would never forget them. Callum had left her. He had left her because he hadn’t loved her any more. He had been so desperate to be rid of her that he hadn’t even contacted her when she had written to tell him that she was pregnant. He could apologise all he liked, but it wouldn’t change anything.
‘It’s too late for apologies, Callum. I’m not interested. The only thing I want to know is what you’re doing here.’
‘Surely that’s obvious,’ he shot back. ‘I came to see you and the baby.’
‘I see. And it’s taken you—what?—over a year to get round to it?’ She gave a little laugh, hoping he couldn’t hear the bitterness it held. There must be no displays of emotion, no hint of any feelings that might make him think that she still cared. ‘You didn’t exactly rush to get here, did you? But there again, I doubt if Beatrix and I were your number one priority—’
‘Beatrix? You mean that we have a daughter?’
‘Yes,’ Beth replied curtly, closing her mind to the shock she could hear in his voice. If she refused to admit to her own feelings then she certainly didn’t want to wonder how Callum felt!
Callum felt his head reel. Ever since he had read Beth’s letter he had wondered about the sex of their baby. To be honest, it had been difficult to believe that he was finally about to become a father after everything they had been through, yet all of a sudden finding out that they had a little girl made it seem real. His breath caught as he was swamped by a whole host of emotions ranging from shock to sheer elation. He had a daughter. A little girl called Beatrix. The thought seemed to rock his whole world so that it was hard to speak. ‘H-how old is she?’
‘Almost ten months,’ Beth replied tightly. ‘Although if you hadn’t been so busy saving the world then you wouldn’t need to ask that, Callum.’
‘That isn’t true!’ He ran his hands through his thick dark brown hair, feeling them trembling as he tried to picture what Beatrix looked like. Was she dark like him or fair like Beth? It was impossible to guess and before he could ask, Beth carried on.
‘Oh, I think it is true, but you just don’t want to admit it.’ She stared back at him, unwilling to give him the benefit of the doubt. Even though he understood why she refused to accept that he was telling the truth, it still hurt. ‘If you’d cared back then, you would have contacted me. Even a text message would have been better than nothing, but you couldn’t even spare the time for that. The fact that I was expecting our child meant nothing to you, did it, Callum?’
‘Of course it did!’ He grasped hold of her hands, his fingers biting into hers as he willed her to believe him. ‘It was what we’d wanted for so long, Beth. What we’d struggled to achieve...’
He broke off, obviously recalling what a struggle it had been, Beth thought sadly. She had always wanted a family. Coming from a close and loving family herself, she had never even considered the idea that conceiving a child of her own might prove to be a problem. With two older sisters, who both had children, she had simply assumed that she would have them too. However, as the months had passed, and she had failed to get pregnant, it had seemed increasingly unlikely that she would ever achieve her dream of becoming a mother.
Callum had never been as keen on the idea of them having a child, however. Although he had gone along with her desire to have a baby, she knew it had been more to please her than out of a genuine need to have a family of his own. She had told herself that it didn’t matter, that he would love their child every bit as much as she did when it arrived. She had been so sure it was the right thing for them to do that she had set aside her doubts when the consultant had suggested they try fertility treatment.
Had she been wrong to do so? she wondered suddenly. Wrong to force him into a course of action that he had been reluctant to take? There was no doubt that the strain of keeping to the gruelling regime had put intense pressure on their relationship. Lovemaking had changed from being an expression of their feelings for each other to a duty, passion no longer dictated by their mutual desire but by the readings on a thermometer.
Was it any wonder that Callum had resented it? That they had argued? With the benefit of hindsight, Beth could see that there had been faults on both sides, but it didn’t alter the fact that it had been Callum who had called a halt, Callum who had decided that he didn’t want to be with her any more, Callum who had asked her for a divorce. If he had loved her, really loved her, then he would never have left her. He would have stayed.
CALLUM COULD FEEL his insides quivering. First there was the shock of thinking that Beth was getting married again and now this. Her hostility was palpable even though he could tell that she was doing her best not to show how angry she felt. That in itself hurt because she had never hidden her feelings before. Whatever Beth had felt, she had been completely open about it.
When she had fallen in love with him, she hadn’t tried to hide it, the same as she hadn’t tried to hide her distress when their marriage had ended. To know that he was responsible for such a change in her was incredibly painful but he couldn’t allow himself to be sidetracked. He had come here for a specific purpose and he had to focus on that. Beth wasn’t going to believe a word he said unless he managed to convince her that he was telling the truth.
‘Look, Beth, I know how it must appear but the situation isn’t as straightforward as you think,’ he began.
‘Save it, Callum. I’ve already told you that I’m not interested.’ Her tone was cold, indifferent even, and something inside him died a little. Even anger was preferable to this total lack of interest. ‘You’ve had months to contact me and never bothered. So why should I listen to you now just because you’ve suddenly decided it’s time we talked?’
‘Because you don’t understand!’
He let go of her hands, feeling the pain of her rejection biting deep into his soul. Heaven knew, he had enough experience of being rejected to recognise it. His parents had never really wanted him. They had both been high-flyers, dedicated to their work, and his unscheduled arrival had been viewed
