answer that, and I'm sure you're gonna find me even crazier: what keeps me here is hope... That's what makes me remain here and take a job I didn't dream of, let go of my desire, and spend my nights enduring the groans from the house next door. The dumb hope that one day he'll wake up and see that I am the woman of his life. Oh, dear God. That just sounds stupid even to me. But who says I can give up this man?
That's why every night I go through the same torment. It starts with anger and then frustration. I get up and drink water to try to and calm down, because I refuse to touch myself to seek some relief from the torment while he's having sex with some girl. So, I lay down again, turn on the TV, go on to the internet to find something interesting on social media, or at least someone to chat with. I toss and turn in bed. Sometimes I feel inspired and write songs I shall never sing for anyone, and there I tell all the love I feel for this fool. There I am until dawn, the house next door falls into silence, and exhausted, I fall into sleep.
Chapter two
Julie
On the following day, I push myself to get up at seven in the morning to take a shower and prepare for my morning run.
There are two things I never give up in the morning: my giant dose of caffeine and my run. They are essential for me to be able to face the rest of the day, as I am a nocturnal person and I work at night.
Tonight, I'm working at After Dark, and I have to be in a good mood to face the night.
I put on some leggings, shine the sneakers, pick up the smartphone and select the playlist "Pop Divas", with the songs cheering me on to run.
I walk out the door singing ‘Baby one more time’ as I warm up on my way to George’s house, my running mate and best friend.
He knows everything about me — my musical dreams, and my unrequited passion for Danny.
"George, let's go! Wake up!”
I knock hard on the door of his house.
"I'll be right there, little girl," he screams from inside. "Let me say goodbye to mi amor.”
If George wasn't gay and so well married to the handsome Ben, I'd drop that crazy crush on Danny and grab him for myself. He's beautiful, intelligent, successful, smells and dresses well. He has dark hair and deep, blue eyes. He's basically a younger Colin Egglesfield... it would be perfect if he wasn’t into the same thing as me!
"Little girl, what's wrong? It looks like you fell out of a moving truck! What, you didn't sleep again?” As he speaks, George sticks a doughnut in his mouth, without giving me time to complain that he is eating crap. He's on an intense diet because he has a wedding to attend, and he needs to fit into his smart Armani suit.
"Yes, the Playboy TV live special didn't let me sleep again," I reply, trying to find a lighter side to it at this time.
"You need to do something: either jump on Danny Boy, that Greek sex god, or get another mullet to remove the cobwebs and scare away that frustration.”
"If I jump on him, he's going to keep thinking I'm a kid and I want to play catch-up, and that I don't have any attractive friends or acquaintances.” “Come on, turn Rihanna on and let's run.”
We ran about three miles together with our pop divas, and on the way back, we stopped at Starbucks. This was a tradition that we couldn’t let go of: having a cappuccino with vanilla and resting a little on one of the sofas at the café.
"Julie, what about the audition to be a backing vocalist of that pop band? When's it going to happen?”
"Next week. But I don't know...”
"No, no, no!”, he interrupts me. “Don’t try to fool me with lies that you don't know if you should go. You've been working at After Dark for years, and the handsome fool never gave you a chance. You’re just not gonna throw that opportunity out the window. You have a phenomenal voice.”
At this point, my phone beeps the sound of an incoming message:
Jo: Any news? Did you talk to him?
She sends me the same message every day. My friend still has the hope that after all these years, one day I'm going to wake up, knock on Daniel's door and declare myself to end this for once and for all!
I: Nope.
That's my standard answer. As soon as I press "send", I get a fright as the phone vibrates in my hand, and I answer without even checking who's calling me so early.
"Hello?”
"Ju, it's Danny.” "He's the only person who calls me that. "Are you out? I'm knocking on your door and you're not answering...”
"Hi, good morning" I answer. George rolls his eyes when he hears my mellow voice on the phone. I give him a little push. "George and I are at Starbucks. Do you need anything?”
"I just wanted to let you know I'm going to take an emergency trip. A property appeared that the broker said would be perfect for the new branch of After Dark. The guys are thinking of expanding to other cities.”
"Oh, it's okay. Are you going to be gone long?”
"I don't know yet. I'm planning to stay there a week to study the place and do some surveys. Maybe a little more, but I'll let you know.”
"All right, Danny. You can rest assured, everything is gonna be okay at After Dark. Are the boys going too?”
“Zach's going, but Rafe's staying to take care of everything. If you need anything, call him. I need to run so I'm not late. Take care of yourself. Hugs.”
"That’s fine. Have a nice trip. Hugs.”
I hang up the phone with a sad face and George raises his eyebrow, questioning what happened.
"He will travel to see a property. I can't believe I'm not going to see Danny for so many days.”
"My God, Julie, get over this man! You need to grow up, girlfriend! I'm going to take you out and you’re gonna meet a hot guy and get Daniel out of your head.”
I laugh at his comment.
"Let it go. Right now, the only hot thing I want is a bath.”
***
As I enter the main hall, I am startled by Rafe's screams on the phone.
"Son of a bitch! I can't believe you're doing this to me today!”
My eyes widen as I put my hand over my mouth. That's the kind of reaction - whichever it may be - that I'd expect from anyone but Rafe. He is polite, charming, his tone of voice is ratherhoarse, driving most of the regular party girls crazy and he never curses.
Obviously,
