about Jamie’s care, but couldn’t wait to take him away because he’d be damned if he would allow history to repeat itself for one more day. Nick had been emotionally neglected by his parents. Erica had suffered the same fate though she could never admit it and preferred living in denial.
There’d been a lot of damage done. He wasn’t about to commit the same crime where Jamie was concerned.
“Hello, Anne.”
She couldn’t bring herself to look at him.
Nick walked over to the carriage, still awed by the fact that he was a father, that he and Erica were responsible for Jamie’s existence.
The baby had inherited Nick’s long, lean body and black hair, but Nick saw hints of Erica’s nose and bone structure in his face. She’d been an attractive, slim brunette of medium height like Anne.
“Hi, sport. Remember me?” Nick leaned over and grasped Jamie’s tiny hand. One look at Nick and the baby breathed a little faster with excitement. He wrapped his fingers around Nick’s index finger. The next thing he knew it went to his mouth, always to the mouth, causing Nick to chuckle.
So far his eyes were a muddy color and would probably go brown like his and Erica’s. No doubt they would fill with tears when he took Jamie away and the baby discovered himself in strange surroundings. Better get this over quick.
Seizing the moment, he lifted the baby and propped him against his shoulder. “Come on, son. We’re going to take a little ride in the car with Paul. Would you like that?”
Walter handed him the quilt and a diaper bag. His eyes sent a message to Nick that he’d better live up to his promises. “The nurse printed out Jamie’s routine and the things you’ll need after you get to your apartment.”
“I can’t thank you enough for watching over Jamie until now. I promise I’ll bring him back next Saturday for a visit.”
“We’ll expect you.” But Walter couldn’t get Anne to lift her head.
“Anytime either of you wants to see him, just come by the apartment. If I’m at work, the nanny will let you in.”
Anne’s head flew back, revealing a face devoid of animation. “Barbara Cosgriff can’t let their nanny come to you until September. There’s no reason to take our grandson yet.” The reproach in her voice was palpable.
“There’s every reason, Anne. I miss my son and am engaging someone else until then.”
“Who?” she demanded.
“I’m not sure yet. My secretary has been interviewing applicants all week. By tomorrow I expect she’ll have found several for me to talk to personally. She’ll do a thorough vetting. That woman is worth her weight in gold and has never let me down yet.”
“What does she know about being a nanny?”
“Though I realize you can’t comprehend it, she’s been an exceptional working mother for me and that has never changed since she came to work eight years ago. It tells me she’ll know what to look for. Keep in mind that the nanny she finds will only be with me three months until the Cosgriffs’ nanny becomes free.”
That was what he was saying now, yet in fact he had no idea if he would hire the Cosgriffs’ nanny at all! But that revelation could keep for another day. “I plan to work shorter hours this summer, so it won’t be as if Jamie’s alone with her twelve hours a day.”
“If you’d taken more time off to travel with Erica, you could have saved your marriage.”
No. Nothing could have saved it, Anne. But to get into a postmortem with her at this stage would be futile.
“Your penthouse isn’t suited to having a baby there, but somehow you insisted on Erica living there with you so you could be close to your work. She needed a real home where she could entertain.”
His temper flared again, but he managed to keep it contained. “She made it into a place where she could invite her friends after the opera and the ballet. I offered to buy Sedgewick Manor in the Hamptons for her, but she preferred to stay with you because she said it suited her better. Jamie and I will manage.”
Nick didn’t know how yet, but he’d figure it out. He kissed the baby’s silky head. “Thank the nurse for the notes. I’m sure I’ll need to refer to them until I get used to the routine.”
She kept her hands tightly clasped in her lap. “The nurse said he’ll be ready for another bottle when he goes down for his nap at noon.”
“That’s good to know. We’ll be back at the apartment by then.” Hopefully at that point Nick would have heard from Leah Tribe about the new nanny.
“See you next Saturday. Remember you can call anytime.”
Nick turned and walked through the house with his son, still disbelieving this day had come and he was leaving the whole dreadful past behind. It was like tearing off a straitjacket.
When Paul saw him, he got out of the limo. Together they put Jamie in his new car seat. Nick could have done it without Paul’s help, but he was grateful for it because it would probably have taken Nick half a dozen tries to get the confounded thing right.
The older man studied his tiny features for a minute. “I see a lot of you in him, Nick. He’s a fine-looking boy.”
“Blame that on his mother.”
Paul patted his shoulder. “I’ll drive carefully.”
“I’m not worried.”
He put the diaper bag on the opposite seat, then sat next to Jamie and fastened his own seat belt. As they started down the driveway, he looked around but only saw the closed front door of Hirst Hollow. It symbolized a closed life because both sets of parents had been emotionally unavailable.
You should have done this sooner, Wainwright.
But it was too late for more regrets. He needed to let the past go and concentrate on Jamie. When he looked down, he caught the baby staring at him.
Nick smiled and put out his hand so he’d grab it. His little fingers took hold with surprising strength. No tears yet. They hadn’t been gone long enough for Jamie to miss the familiar faces of his nurse and grandparents.
He fought down the anger generated by his own lack of action up to now. Mired in guilt, he’d been slow to pull himself out of a depression that had its inception long before Erica’s death. His estrangement from her had been one thing, but to realize his son barely knew him twisted his gut.
A chance remark by a client last week had wakened him out of his morose stupor. “With your wife gone, that new baby of yours must be a real joy to you. There’s nothing like a child to make the pain go away.” The comment made him realize he could be a good father.
Once his client had left the office, Nick had got on the phone to his attorney and let him know he planned to bring Jamie home where he belonged. After setting things in motion, he’d called in Leah to help him start looking for a nanny.
Nick studied the little scrap of humanity strapped in the infant seat next to
