face softened. “I understand how hard that must be for you, Sam. But I think you jumped the gun. And damn it, I hate to lose the only man I’m positive I could stand for a son-in-law. Truly.”
That touched him. He’d gotten along very well with Franny and Virgil—once they’d accepted him. They hadn’t thought he’d be happy with their daughter, suggesting that perhaps his family was too embedded in the Silk-Stocking Row for him to know a thing of quality when he saw it. He’d known it, however. Maddie would sparkle no matter where she was, and growing up on a hundred-acre cotton farm hadn’t affected her brilliance. “I can’t change the fact that we separated. Can’t turn back the clock.”
“No. But it would be best for everyone if you cease this disastrous living arrangement here and now. The two of you belong together. And I hope you’ll remember my advice and not get all hotheaded when you discover Maddie decided to return to using her maiden name.” Franny shook her head. “I sure wish you the best of luck, Sam, but quite frankly, I fear you stayed away too long.”
MADDIE NEARLY HAD heart failure when the door to her bedroom was flung open. She instinctively tightened her hold on the baby she was nursing. “Did it ever occur to you to knock?”
“I just had a conversation with your mother.”
She frowned at her tall, way too handsome ex. “I’m trying to relax so I can breast-feed. I can’t deal with family angst right now.”
He sat on the edge of the bed, his gaze suddenly fixated on the contented newborn at her breast. Plainly uncomfortable, he diverted his gaze, fastening it to the lamb-and-lion picture on the opposite wall. “I beg your pardon.”
“Not necessary. Just please don’t barge in. This is the only place in the house I can be alone. I’m having trouble letting down.”
“Relaxing?”
“Letting down milk.”
“Oh.” He moved his gaze to a large potted palm in the corner.
She closed her eyes, enjoying the feel of the warm, sleepy baby in her arms. “Are you bothered by the breast-feeding?”
“I’m not sure what I am. Trying to give you some privacy, I think.” He stared down at his hands. “I’d like to help, though.”
“What do you want to do?”
He shrugged big shoulders, the white polo shirt he wore flexing over a broad back. “Help somehow. Hold the baby. Do something. To be honest, I’m having trouble letting down myself.”
They weren’t talking about milk now. “In what way?”
“I guess even though those are my children, I don’t feel bonded to them in any way. Connected.”
She could see the frown of concentration even with his face in profile. “You weren’t here, so you didn’t see me pregnant. And you haven’t really held them. Go ahead, Sam. Pick Henry up.”
“Where is he?” He looked around, finally spying the baby between two king-size pillows on a towel on the lace-covered bed.
The small baby lay on his stomach, sucking his fist gently, eyes blinking. “I don’t think I should pick him up. I might hurt him.”
“You won’t.” Maddie smiled. “It’s the only way to bond. You have to touch them, hold them, smell them. Change diapers.”
She stood, handing Hayden to Sam before he realized what she was doing. He was too busy trying to figure out how to settle the tiny baby in his arms to sneak a look at her breasts, and Maddie thought it an excellent sign that he was concentrating. Silently, she picked up Henry and settled him to feed.
Apparently Sam developed the knack of holding a baby with lightning speed because his gaze immediately focused on the infant latching on to her nipple. Rats. Now she was uncomfortable.
“Your breasts are so swollen. Do they hurt?”
“A little,” she admitted. “Though I think I won’t be in as much pain if you look away.”
He did, but she could see his eyes were still wide with amazement. The tingling between her legs warned her that she was still very aware of Sam as a man, not as her ex. She insisted to herself the physical sensation was only her body reacting to the baby suckling her nipple. Abby told me that breast-feeding would cause my uterus to contract. That’s all it is.
“I like holding him,” Sam said, his voice rich with pleasure.
Unexpected tears popped into Maddie’s eyes. Would miracles never cease?
“You’re kind of…sweet,” he murmured. “I mean, I think you need a diaper change, little fella, ’cause I’m pretty sure that’s not baby powder I smell, but hey, a guy’s gotta do what a guy’s gotta do, right?”
He held the baby to his chest, gazing down into the small, open eyes. “I think someone should clean your bottom, which is going to be a little cruel since you’ve had your nice warm mother comforting you with those big breasts, treatment to put any right-thinking male into a seriously relaxed trance. A wipe down to the backside won’t be near as nice, but then you can get right back inside your cozy little blanket. Quite the life of luxury, eh, little man?”
Maddie’s lips parted as Sam oh-so-carefully laid the baby on the bed.
“How do I do this?”
Her eyes widened. “Can you?” She’d expected him to hand the baby to her.
“Is there a huge difference for babies?” Sam asked. “Except less space to cover?”
“I guess not. The washcloths are stacked on the bathroom counter. Go in there and warm one up, and grab a diaper, too.”
“Okay.” He went into the master bath. “Whoa! Who installed the ugly woman spitting water? That’s frightening!”
Maddie grinned. “Our mothers.”
“Ugh!”
“It’s supposed to be soothing. They put it in there to give me an illusion of tranquility. Your mom read that the sound of water bubbling or gurgling was supposed to be calming, so my mom bought the fountain, and together they worked on it.”
“I’m sure they had the best of intentions.” He brought the warmed cloth out, and carefully peeled off the tiny diaper. “I didn’t hear any bubbling or gurgling. Just spitting. And I’ve got to tell you, that’s not a remarkably serene sound effect.”
Maddie couldn’t help laughing. At that moment, her milk let down. “Oh, my gosh!”
“What is it?” He stared at her, pausing in his diapering.
“I let down! I let down! It really works!” Grateful delight ran all through her. “I was so afraid I wouldn’t be able to breast-feed!”
“Why wouldn’t you? You’ve got more-than-satisfactory equipment.”
She let that go in her joy. “I don’t
