an absolute masterpiece, a stunning work of art.
That is exactly how you describe yourself, isn’t it? God’s beloved. A work of art. (Did you laugh when you read that, or roll your eyes? Because I did both while I wrote it.)
It’s hard to believe this, isn’t it? It’s hard to get real. I think we have just pretended for so long that it feels wrong to drop our mask and widen the camera lens and show the whole picture. But here is the thing. There will never be a filter we can use that will keep our true selves from the One who sees all, knows all, and created all. And I often wonder what God thinks when he sees us poring over false images, doubting who we are, buying into lies, comparing our lives to one another, trying to remake ourselves to look like someone else. I think about how sad he must feel when we pick apart our faces, our bodies, our marriages, our families, our careers, our lives, desperately trying to cover up the imperfections, remove the unwanted. And oh, how exhausted we are. How painfully tired we are from all of this performing. From all of this nonsense. From all of these empty attempts at identifying ourselves as anything other than “child of God.” Because the bottom line is just that. We are his beloved. We are his creation. He made us to love him and to know him here on earth, so that we can live for an eternity with him in heaven. It really is so simple.
And yet, we have made it so incredibly complicated. The world has shoved an endless buffet of self-image choices in our face, telling us we can pick who we are, remake ourselves completely, choose our identity and what we want to be. And I will be honest. I have been up and down that buffet for forty-seven years now. Turns out, finding suggestions on how to change myself, to better myself, to improve who I am apart from a relationship with God is super easy! But finding the truth about my identity? Finding the one thing that tells me to stop striving, to stop self-loathing, to rest in the arms of my Father because I have been made in his image, and because he loves me, just as I am? Not so easy. The choice that reminds me that my self-worth is not wrapped up in my appearance, successes, how big or clean my house is, or by the number of college acceptances and scholarships my children earn, or by that stupid, freaking number on the scale? I can’t easily find that choice. And how sad. How incredibly sad that we are all running around like headless chickens, desperate for purpose, dying for meaning, running in circles of despair, because by the world’s standards, our worth is nothing.
Sweet friend, this could not be any farther from the truth of who we are and the enormous value we possess. Because you see, my self-worth, and your self-worth? If we truly want to break out the measuring stick, if we honestly require an accurate weight of our worth, all we need to do is stop grasping at the empty promises around us and look up at the crucifix. Close your eyes right now for one minute and see it. See him. Because the fact is that God sent his only beloved Son to earth, to feel all that we feel, to live among us, to give up his life for sinners like you and me while he was sinless, and to die a most hideous death just for you and for me — just as we are. And he would do it all over again, even if we were the only two people on earth to die for. Do we really need more proof of how precious we are, how beautiful we are, how worth it we are, than that?
We were worth dying for. And we still are.
It is when I do this, when I take my self-doubt, my self-hatred, my hideous lack of self-worth, and the false idea that I can find my identity in anything other than Christ, to the foot of the cross, then I can see our Father reaching out to all of us, as a loving father does. And I can hear his voice saying,
“Oh, sweet daughter, just stop. Please stop and listen. I made you. Do you hear me? You are my beautiful creation. And you have been made perfect in my image. Not the images you see on Instagram. MY image. There is no bit of you that is unwanted. I knit you myself, and I do not make mistakes. Stop undoing the threads. It is killing you. You are exhausted. I did not make you to feel this way. Stop the striving, take off the filter, and just be you. Only I can purify you, only I can refine you. Let me. Let my light pass through you. Quit shutting me out. Put down the filter of this world and take up MY filter. Look at yourself through my eyes, and through my heart. See yourself the way I see you. See how I love you, how very much I want you. Just as you are. Every piece of you. Wanted.”
And then I hear him say, “By the way, she bought that pie from the store and the rest of her house was a mess, and you don’t need a farm table, and you want to see homeless? Because I can show you homeless … so please … just shut up.” Only God probably doesn’t say shut up. I do. I should probably filter that.
I don’t know. I just think we live a half-filled life when we spend it trying to make it look like something it isn’t; when we spend it trying to fill it with things that do not come from God. Because honestly? Who are we fooling? God sees you, and he wants you. Every bit of the you he created. He doesn’t want you looking like a deer and he doesn’t care how perfect your life looks on your Instagram feed. Only he holds your purpose, and only he knows your plan. And the sooner we get to know him, who knew us before we were born, the sooner those plans will be revealed. God sees so much more than you are willing to show, and he knows the amazing things about you that he has given to only you. And he wants it all.
You are wanted as is. Made in his image. Unfiltered. Unstaged. Totally and 100 percent wanted. Look at that image. Post that. And believe it.
Battle Plan
Let’s check our “feed”: those things we look at, allowing them to influence us and shape our hearts. Maybe it’s social media, gossip magazines, or a favorite Netflix binge. Do a heart check and ask yourself, “Am I encouraged by what I see? Or do I want to throw myself off a cliff when I’m done?” So many of us are choosing to look at things that chip away at our self-image, dragging us down into the pit of comparison. Pay attention to how you feel after you spend time looking at these images. Maybe it is time to clean up your feed not only by eliminating the junk, but by adding more truth and beauty.
Weapon of Choice
The Belt of Truth is the first piece of armor we need to put on. This is no ordinary leather belt. You won’t find it at TJ Maxx. From it will hang our Sword of the Spirit, so it is a most important piece of defense, not only protecting us against the lies that bombard us, but also preparing us for victory in the battle. I have always wanted to say this: “Gird your loins!” And while girding, go ahead and repeat often, “You are all fair, my love; there is no flaw in you” (Song 4:7), believing that these are God’s words spoken to you, just as you are.
Chapter 3
The “What’s in It for Me?” Battle
“Give, and it will be given to you; good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you give will be the measure you get back.”
— Luke 6:38
My favorite Gospel story is the one where the angel Gabriel comes down to the young, sweet Virgin Mary and announces God’s plan for her, the “news of great joy”: that she will be overshadowed by the Holy Spirit, become pregnant and give birth to the Son of God, and she will call him Jesus, meaning, “God saves.” And without hesitation, Mary looks up to the angel, eyes wide, leans in close, and quietly asks, “What’s in it for me?”
Oh, wait.
That’s not how it goes.
Actually,
