hour of death. She considered that God himself implanted the love of parents in the hearts of children. The grief of a child over the loss of a father was sacred to her. But she also realized that a religious in this grief, when everything reminded her of the love and warmth of her own parental home, must remain true to her total surrender to God. For her, grief at the death of parents may not become an occasion for a flight back into the past. In a situation of this nature, the dedicated bride of Christ can, through faithful perseverance on the way of love, obtain ever greater graces for her dear ones.
Such beautiful adjustment God grants to a Sister who shows such love for her parents. Certainly there exists — exteriorly — a separation, as also the married daughter must go her own way in the new unity of marriage. But the religious should not only preserve the love of parents but should know that God wishes to bless her parents in a special way through her religious vocation. Mother Maria Theresia in making it possible for her Sisters to show their love and gratitude to their parents by actually assisting them in their last illness and in death, gave clear evidence of how truly human her guidance of the Sisters was and what she herself felt toward her own parents.
In touching warmth this rings out from the letter she wrote to Sister Eustella in 1902:
The news of the bitter sufferings of your dear mother has saddened me deeply. Let me trust in God, dear Sister Eustella, and beg him fervently to alleviate her pain and grant her great patience to persevere in resignation. The consolation of having you, dear child, at her bed of suffering to care for her, I gladly permit the dear sick one and you also, that you may lighten her suffering as much as possible and support her in her last hour. We shall pray with you, dear Sister Eustella, and also for you. I am certain that your comforting and assisting love will be a source of many blessings for your loved ones. Sister Casilda will gladly take care of your little ones. Fulfill your filial duties loyally and lovingly to your good sick mother. Please assure her and also your good father of our prayers and many greetings. We are with you in sympathy and in prayer. If you are able, keep us informed. I greet you in the love of Jesus and Mary. (III 52)
Does not the sympathy with the sorrows of the sisters resound as an echo of the wholehearted love and fidelity that she as a child offered her own parents? Unfortunately, we have but few instances of Aline’s childhood in her parental home. The way she saw the sisters’ relations to their parents reveals much of the atmosphere in the Bonzel home.
The family home was in the immediate vicinity of the parish church. Aline grew up under the influence and in the shadow of the House of God. Did the nearness to the church leave its impress on the lives of the children? The mother took the children to church with her at an early age. At one time during the so-called “Perpetual Prayer,” she took Aline with her into the festively flowing church. Most likely at home and again at the church door came the motherly warning that in church one must be good and quiet. But as the little one saw the numerous brilliantly lighted candles on the altar, silence was flung to the winds. Joyously her spirited child voice rang out clear and loud with the silent church, “Oh, how many lights!” Immediately her jubilant outcry was smothered by the mother: “Here you may not talk; you must be very quiet; God is there upon the altar.” One wonders what went on in the mind of the child that often prayed with its mother to God and now was told distinctly: “There before us on the altar is God.”
Aline said of herself later that she joyfully joined all childish pranks. Was it the Bigge River flowing past the motherhouse, constructed in after years, that kept her memory alive as to her youthful frolic in skating? Many girls are able to recall a period of life in which they loved to imitate boys, yet, better even excel them. This was also true in regard to Aline; in retrospect she considered herself a vivacious girl. Olpe offers children many possibilities for play and adventures. There are the hills of the Sauerland with their extensive woods to allure youth; the Bigge and the smaller streams to offer them the whole romance of running waters. Winter with its ice and snow gives children the liberty to romp about joyously in the invigorating air. All this one can project into the childhood and youth of Aline. Unfortunately but few incidents of this period of her life are available. The smaller and the greater joys, the smaller disappointments and the real sorrows of the child have not been recorded as research into the life of Mother Theresia revealed. Today, unfortunately, the possibilities of obtaining particulars of Aline’s childhood are irretrievably lost.
The exact year of Aline’s First Holy Communion cannot be ascertained. Most likely it followed the universal custom of the time, namely, at the completion of the elementary school. She was then fourteen years of age. It was only through the endeavors of Pius X that children were permitted to approach the Table of the Lord at an earlier age. It was not impossible that, in exceptional instances, children were permitted to receive Holy Communion earlier. If such an exception had been Aline’s, she would certainly have registered her joy, since she preserved an animated and exact account of the day of her First Holy Communion.
To judge correctly what she later told a Sister, one must take Aline’s age into consideration:
On the day of my first Holy Communion I was unspeakably happy. Before that I was a vivacious child, ready to take part in every prank. But after I received the Lord into my heart and returned to my place in the church an indescribable feeling came over me. In the joy I experienced, but one thought filled my whole being. As Jesus had given himself entirely to me, I must give myself entirely to him. Without really knowing what I was saying I repeated over and over again, ‘O Lord, I am your victim, accept me as your victim; do not reject me.’ This prayer silenced every other thought and raised me to a state of indescribable blessedness.
Nearly all whom God calls in a special way know very precisely at what time God’s will was first consciously experienced by them. Was this the hour in Aline’s life that opened to her the path of her life? That she later remembered so exactly her prayer at that time makes one surmise it was. She spoke of the experience of that hour: “One thought filled my whole being, as Jesus had given himself entirely to me, I must give myself entirely to him.” This in a noticeable way reminds us of the words of St. Francis of Assisi: “Keep nothing of yourself for yourself that he may accept you completely who gave himself to you completely.” Whoever comprehends God’s great gift of himself, must in answer give him a mutual love of surrender. Thus the youthful heart answers in readiness: “O Lord, I am your victim; accept me completely as your victim; do not reject me.”
Eucharistic piety at that time was characterized chiefly by adoration of our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament. Only on special occasions were the faithful granted the great grace of union with our Lord in Holy Communion. In the piety of all, Communion was considered as the “coming of the soul’s sweet Guest to dwell in the human heart.” Undoubtedly, one believed the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass was the sacrifice of Christ and also our sacrifice. Faith also recognized Holy Communion as the banquet of the soul. But to the individual these thoughts remained ineffective. Thus it is rather surprising that Aline, also a product of the times, in reference to the grace of the Eucharist should understand and speak out so clearly of the idea of sacrifice. Is this not evident: He who gives himself completely to God, to him God grants the fullness of his mysteries?
Chapter II
Maturing of Vocation
Aline’s mother was a good example to her daughters both in vigor and in piety. Undoubtedly the relatives, after the premature death of the father, rendered the widowed mother and her children all necessary assistance. But the education and the development of the children devolved upon the mother who possessed the necessary capacity to take that responsibility in hand. Between her and her daughters there naturally existed a very close bond of union. Even in later years the mother was always concerned
