mother when she and others have this magical date in mind. Some women don’t even tell others the exact date because of the pressure then felt to have the baby, or to “perform” by that date. If you think others will be overly excited to have the baby born by that date, putting unrealistic or unhealthy pressure on you and the baby, consider telling people “sometime in May” rather than the exact forty-week mark. Remember, the due date is simply the date in the middle of the five-week window when you might have the baby. It is not an expiration date. Special circumstances aside, your baby will come when your baby is ready.
So-o-o, How Does It All Work?
Sometime during those five weeks at term, you will go into labor. When your body goes into labor, you are flooded (usually unbeknownst to you) with hormones that begin the work of opening the uterus wide enough to allow the baby to pass through. We break this down into three observable “stages” of birth:
Labor (First Stage): The womb contracts and gradually opens the cervix (simply the opening of the uterus).
Pushing (Second Stage): The baby is pushed out of the uterus by a different type of contraction.
Afterbirth (Third Stage): The woman’s womb contracts again to release the placenta and begins to shrink back down to its pre-pregnant size.
What Starts Labor?
Interestingly, very little is known about how God designed labor to begin and what actually “triggers” it. We know that most babies do best when they are allowed to gestate until they are ready to come out, and theories have been growing that in a healthy mom it actually is the baby that decides when he or she is ready. Scientists have recently discovered that babies release a protein in their lungs that plays a part in triggering mom’s body to go into labor.62 We know the mother responds to that release with increasing amounts of oxytocin, and that is what stimulates the uterus to begin to contract and open up.
It is amazing that we don’t actually know more about what “flips the switch,” but we do know that God designed labor and birth, so it is wise to be very careful about intervening without sufficient reason. Babies that are brought out too early often have breathing difficulties, struggle with nursing, and are more vulnerable to infection and being sent to the NICU. If a mother’s body isn’t ready, the birth is more likely to have complications and end in a cesarean section. When it is possible and other situations don’t arise, waiting until the baby’s and mom’s bodies are both ready gives the best possible chance for a simple, complication-free birth.
It can take a great amount of trust, especially at the end of a pregnancy, to know that your body will go into labor. Support and encouragement from your husband, like-minded friends, and provider are invaluable at this time. Have a project or two that you leave until those last few weeks, and keep making plans that you can look forward to. I even recommend making plans past the estimated due date, knowing that you can always cancel. Most women find it’s more helpful to have things to do and stay active and positive, rather than clearing the schedule only to sit around waiting for labor to start. Those last few weeks of pregnancy are challenging enough without adding internal pressure and frustration with your body and your baby into the mix.
There are most certainly situations that can arise where it is best to intervene and artificially induce labor for mom or baby. A good provider will be diligent in care but prudent in intervening, doing so only when it is of pressing concern.
Opening the Womb
When labor begins, the body begins to release large amounts of oxytocin into both the bloodstream and the nervous system, and the uterus begins to contract. Oxytocin, known as the “bonding hormone,” or “love hormone,” is released in torrential amounts during three main times: orgasm, labor contractions, and while breastfeeding. It is also released in much smaller amounts through touch, kissing, low lighting, good smells, and good memories. Because it is a neurotransmitter (unlike the synthetic form Pitocin), it affects both our brain chemistry and the rest of our body.
One of the main purposes of this hormone release is to bond two people together, emotionally and chemically, as happens between husband and wife. This tells us something amazing about God’s plan: husbands and wives are designed to be bonded for life, and mothers are designed and biologically created to have a real and lasting bond with their baby. God’s plan of family is written into our very bodies. This is one reason why it hurts so much when a sexual relationship ends, why a mother who never knew her baby past birth can still feel eternally connected to him or her, and why we can feel bonded after birth to the people who were with us during it. Our bodies are meant to work with our souls and are designed to reinforce and work with spiritual reality.
Oxytocin release is encouraged when a mother feels safe, respected, and private. The opposite is also true. If she feels threatened, exposed, judged, or vulnerable, it can inhibit the release of this incredibly important hormone. This means that a woman’s environment (both people and place) matters greatly to the birth process itself. The release of oxytocin begins contractions that are usually subtle at first but continue to grow and intensify. Most women who go into labor naturally have a difficult time pinpointing when exactly labor began. For most, early contractions begin gradually and gently, and are often not all that notable. There is usually not a concrete “this is it” contraction that begins labor, as we often see in the movies. The majority of women do not have their water break before labor begins, also contrary to most television and movie portrayals.
Usually, beginning contractions don’t follow a specific pattern. Some women describe them as a “tightening,” some as menstrual cramps that increase in intensity, and others like back pain that wraps around to their abdomen. Part of how they experience a contraction can be influenced by the baby’s position (whether the baby is anterior or posterior) as well as whether this is their first birth or not. The contractions (or “surges,” as some people prefer to call them) increase in intensity, working to pull the uterus muscle up and stretching the cervix open. The cervix, again, is simply the opening to the uterus. Before birth, it is thick, tightly closed, and sealed with mucous, protecting your baby until the time of birth. If you picture the uterus as a balloon with the opening pointed down, the contractions are first thinning out that opening, then pulling the opening wider, dilating it until it is about ten centimeters wide and big enough to allow the baby through. Contractions usually occur in a “wave.” You can begin to feel it coming, it grows and reaches a peak, and then slowly releases. In a natural labor, there are breaks in between the contractions, allowing you to rest and reenergize for the next one. There are three stages of this opening: early labor, active labor, and transition.
The First Stage of Birth — Labor
Early Labor
In early labor, the cervix is thinning out and beginning to open. You may begin to see lots of mucous or what is called “bloody show,” which is part of or possibly the whole mucous plug, sometimes tinged with a bit of blood, that was sealing up the cervix and protecting the baby. Contractions may be consistent or sporadic. You usually can go about your day in between these early contractions and should eat and drink and rest if you can so you have the energy you will need for later. It’s important to know that for some women this stage can last for days. If you can talk between contractions, you’re still in early labor. If you plan to birth at a hospital, it’s not time to go in yet. If you can sleep, do so!
Early labor is usually defined as the cervix dilating from zero to about four centimeters, but it’s helpful not to have numbers in mind. Just let your body do what it needs to do. Many women find the best coping strategy during this time is to go about their normal day as much as possible, “ignoring” the labor in a way. Keep a good attitude, knowing that the
