Prayer Book for Widows. Kay M. Cozad

       The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves the crushed in spirit.

       — PSALM 34:18

      I believe that prayer is a necessity of life for people of faith. It is a gift from God for our own sake. He gives us this avenue to express our gratitude, to confess our shortcomings, to make our needs known, and to mightily praise His name. Prayer keeps the soul united with its Creator. It gives voice to the joys and sorrows of this life.

      Prayer is an essential part of the Church community as well. It is the chain that links us together with God. And as God holds a special place in His heart for the widow, as evidenced in Scripture, so does His Church. He has held His Church accountable for the widows in its midst through the ages, and the Church has stood willing to honor them in their time of need. James 1:27 says, “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God and the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.” This rich tradition of my faith and prayer has brought me hope. So, with the Church, I aspire to honor the widow and bring her hope in her affliction with these prayers.

      This book of prayers was born out of my own need to express myself to God on a heart level. These prayers give voice to the wanderings of my own personal grief journey.

      Following the death of my husband, I was forced to begin a life that I could never have imagined or ever asked for. My faith was in God and His mercy, yet there were many times I felt so bereaved that I had no voice to express the pain I felt. No prayer came to unite me with God and keep me in His comforting presence. As I traveled the path of grief, in God’s time and with His healing power, I began to write these prayers. I share them with you now — you who have lost your husband and are suffering the pain and confusion of loss.

      Though we can acquaint ourselves with the logical stages of grief, we who experience loss know it is a journey of the heart. So, my hope is that if you find yourself, as I did, without strength to give voice to your need, this prayer book will be a starting place to find that voice.

      May these words of prayer be helpful to you as you wander on your journey. I believe that the Lord knows our hearts, and that we feel His loving presence when we stay close to Him in prayer. Pray and take courage. Do the work of grief. May you find comfort and lasting peace as you travel this heart journey. And may the Lord turn your mourning into joy.

      — Kay Cozad

      Chapter One

       You Have Met Death

       Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil; for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff, they comfort me.

       — PSALM 23:4

      You have met death. You have lost someone very dear — your husband, your other half. The void he left in your life is gaping. The pain and sadness you experience is intense. This is the beginning of a long and difficult journey: the journey through grief. Though others have traveled this path before you, your journey will be distinctly your own. Honor it with prayerful faith and hope, one step at a time.

      The following prayers are cries of anguish to Our Lord. Use them as a starting point from which to pour out your soul. Myriad emotions will flow in like the tide as you struggle with your loss. Give them all to God. He desires your alliance as He shoulders your pain. He is ever-loving and faithful, and He will answer your prayer.

You Know My Pain

      Lord,

      You have called my husband home.

      He is gone from me.

      I have lost half of myself.

      Where do I go from here?

      How do I survive?

      I turn to You now.

      You know my pain.

      I am exhausted by grief.

      Waves of emotion flood over me.

      Carry me, please.

      Have mercy on me and light my way.

      Bring me comfort in my sadness.

      Sustain me as I set about the task

      of living life without my husband.

      Gather my broken heart in Your love

      and help me get through today. Amen.

My Husband

      Heavenly Father,

      I bring to You my hope

      that You have welcomed my dear one

      into Your heavenly kingdom.

      Embrace him in Your loving arms.

      Grant him eternal rest, Lord.

      He was my husband and my friend.

      A good and faithful servant.

      As I take in the unfamiliar, knowing that he is gone,

      I pray that he is well.

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