we’re on the topic of fashion…” She could see him a little better now, in spite of the room’s gloom, and once again wondered if his hair would feel like it looked…like coarse silk. “What’s this about a white wedding gown?”
“Oh, are we gonna do that? Because the time to do that was before you asked me to marry you.”
“I’m just curious,” he said mildly.
“Sure you are. Let’s put it this way: I’m not a virgin, but I’m not a slut, either.”
“You can’t know,” he said, perfectly straight-faced, “how relieved I am.”
“Listen up, wise guy—I can count the number of partners I’ve had on one hand.” She paused and added pointedly, “Can you?”
“Ah…not on one hand, no…in fact, I think I might need a third hand…maybe…and possibly a few of my toes…”
“Hypocrite!”
“Well, I am six years older than you. Oof!” He said “oof!” because she’d swung her pillow, sidearm, into his face. “Ah-ha! Now the truth comes out—you’re going to be an abusive wife, I can sense it.”
“Sure I am. Look, if you really want chapter and verse, we can do that. I mean…you’re right, it’s a fair question. But I expect reciprocation.”
He shook his head. “No need.”
“Chickenshit.”
“No, it’s like I said, I was just curious. It’s in the past, it has nothing to do with me, or us, and besides that, it’s your own personal business. That’s not the main reason I came in here, anyway.”
“Yeah? Other than keeping me from much-deserved sleep, what are you doing here?”
“I like teasing you. It’s…something different. Your reaction, I mean.”
“Super. Listen, not that this isn’t fascinating and all…”
“You’re fascinating.” Was he leaning in? He was! The lean-in! Oooh, prelude to a kiss. Their second kiss. Excellent. She’d been ready to make a move herself if he wasn’t going to. “I didn’t expect that. I knew you’d be pretty, but…”
He’s really got to work on this romantic prince thing. Because he just sucks at it. Well, maybe princes don’t have to try as hard. “Thanks.”
“…but I didn’t expect…the sheer excitement…I think it’s the force of your personality…”
“David. Will you shut up and kiss me?”
“…it’s really extraordinary, you fairly vibrate with life…”
“David. Seriously.”
“…and—ack!”
He said “ack” because someone had grabbed him by the shirt collar and hauled him off the bed. A very large someone, even broader than David. In fact, it was—
“Ah-ha! Trying to get some nookie before the big day, eh?” The king shook the prince like a terrier would shake a rat. “Nice try.”
“Al!” she said furiously. “Get lost! Go to bed!” On top of being weird, they’re all insomniacs…bizarre! “Don’t make me kick your big butt out of here.”
“Save it, sweetie. And you…time to go to your own room. I’m a modern guy—”
“A modern idiot is more like it,” Sweetie snapped.
“—but I can’t have premarital royal sex going on under my rooftop.”
“It’s none of your damned business if I want to have sex with a duck!” she screeched.
“No,” Prince David said, extricating himself from his father’s grasp, “but it’s mine.” He straightened his shirt and jerked his head, tossing his dark hair out of his face. “Oh, and my lord king, if you ever yank me away from my fiancée again, I’ll break out all your teeth.”
“Whoa,” the king and Christina said in unison.
David treated them to a frigid bow. “Good night.”
“Did you hear that?” the king cried as the door slammed. “He threatened felony assault!”
“He’s not the only one.”
“On his sovereign! Awww, they grow up so fast.” He tapped his chest, which was currently covered with a T-shirt that read, I’M THE KING, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? “Gets me right here.”
“I’m going to get you right there. Go away.”
“Calm down—I’m going, I’m going.”
What a bunch of nutjobs, she thought, lying back down. I must be out of my mind.
Sure you are. Then how come you can’t wipe that silly grin off your face?
Sleep was hard in coming; she spent entirely too much time thinking about the lean-in, and replaying the look in his eyes. For the first time, she didn’t worry so much about what she was getting herself into.
Chapter 11
“Look, Eddie—”
“Edmund.”
“—don’t take this the wrong way or anything—”
He sighed. “I am bracing myself, because you always say that before coming out with something thoroughly offensive.”
“Cracked my code, eh? Anyway, I’m going to be the princess, right? So who cares what fork I use when? I mean, I’ll be…” She snorted a giggle through her nose. He fervently hoped she would get over the habit of laughing like a loon whenever she contemplated her future station. “…royalty, and all.”
“Exactly why you must set an example.”
“Me?” He noted she nearly fell out of her chair in surprise. “Set an example?”
“I admit,” he said, admiring the way the sunlight bounced off her shoulder-length waves, making the blond strands look like beaten gold, “it pains me to speak of it.”
It was fortunate she had excellent hair, because there was a truly unpleasant expression on her face at the moment. In fact, her dimples had entirely disappeared. They were, he privately thought, her best feature. They made her look mischievous and charming at the same time. “Edmund, I’ve got a real news flash for you. People don’t give a crap what fork royalty uses.”
“I beg to differ.”
“Ed—they totally don’t.”
They glared at each other and then Edmund, who had battled the king for years, switched tactics. “Of course,
