The 12 Secrets of Highly Successful Women. Gail McMeekin
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Shame is a creativity murderess. Fear is another.
Gillian grew up in England at a time when women were not encouraged to go to college, but her brother was allowed to go. She did go to art school and then secretarial school and she admits that she can still type “like the wind.” When I asked Gillian about the secret to her success, she said: “To really KNOW myself, know my rhythms, idiosyncrasies, strengths, weaknesses, and true goals. I found out at the age of twenty-one that working a 9-to-5 job was not for me, or even working for other people, and I have been self-employed ever since, in one way or the other. I prefer the freedom. It suits my energy, which comes in extreme spurts, and then I need a fallow period to recover and regroup. I have a form of ADD and instead of feeling sorry for myself, I have learned to focus on my strengths and realize that there are certain things I'll never be good at, such as keeping a strict routine, building up a business after the initial exciting, creative part, or speaking in public. I don't waste my time focusing on them, or feeling bad about myself because I am not good at those things. I am better as a behind-the-scenes person. And that's fine. We can't all be Oprah.”
Part of your healing process is learning to take positive, calculated risks that feed your personal, professional, and creative growth. I have done a lot of writing and teaching about risk-taking and its benefits.
Are you ready to take some creative risks yourself? Here are some guidelines for you to follow as you traverse the potentially treacherous trail.
1 Make certain that you are passionate about what you are doing. If you don't have the zest, you won't have the stamina to stick with it.
2 Know what talents you have and what you will need help and support with. While some people like Gillian can manage to do most things themselves, many of us aren't quite that daring and adaptable, so we may need to enlist other resources.
3 Give yourself the time and the space to focus on your learning curve. It takes time to learn something new. I just started painting peonies, which I adore, but my hundredth painting will be far better than my first.
4 Realize that, as a risk-taker in the marketplace, you are going to have to sell your idea, product, or service to someone in order to get it out into the world. Brush up on the self-marketing skills that we have talked about and put together a plan that you can enjoy and stay committed to.
5 Lastly, know when it's time to move on. Some risks don't pan out and we need to cut our losses and let go. Other risks nourish us for a period of time and then we need to wave a “done” wand and advance. These transitions can be daunting, but they are totally normal and to be expected.
Decide what risk you would like to take and get started. Release your fears and inhibitions, take the plunge into the land of creative abundance, and enjoy!
STOP TOLERATING PAIN
What are you tolerating in your life? Whatever it is becomes a challenge to conquer. As creative vessels, we need to take exquisite care of our bodies, minds, and spirits so that our channels are clear and open.
After a couple of years of putting up with intermittent neck and shoulder pain, I finally signed up for physical therapy, which is time consuming and pushes against my non-jock edges. Yet, after many weeks, the pain is now gone most days, which is fabulous. In order to keep the pain from coming back, I have to watch my computer posture and do neck exercises daily. (What a reminder that most things have to be worked at regularly as opposed to being magically fixed.) But confronting this pain has been a powerful metaphor that has stimulated other life changes for me.
I completely redesigned my home office with luxurious leather chairs and artwork so that I can see in-person clients here and have everything in one place. I have totally changed my project filing system, so that I can better manage my idea mania. In addition, I have declared one day a week as my Creativity Day, and am leveraging the power of morning time for big-picture business planning, new product development, and writing. I've also worked with a dream group and am instructing my dream genie each night to support my creative projects. More additions and subtractions are in the works as well, and I feel empowered and excited. Yet, like keeping my neck relaxed and strong, all of these changes will require commitment and refining. But like the pain in my neck, I no longer want to tolerate anything that does not support my body, mind, and spirit. Only when we face the “pain” in our lives can we create new habits and structures.
CHALLENGES
What kinds of physical or emotional “pain” are you accepting in your life? Do you need to discover more fulfilling work? Do you need to redirect your creative energy? Do you need to get healthy? Do you need more friends? Keep a journal for a month and use it to take a personal “pain” inventory of what is not working in your life. Choose three action steps to complete this year, remembering that you will need to carve out time to initiate your new intentions. Conquering pain that we can fix is proactive and is a signal to the universe that we are empowered!
As we grow, we must deal with losses. Just as we do balance sheets of profits and losses in our business, we need to take time regularly to acknowledge our blessings and release our failures and disappointments.
Some of you had creative dreams that failed to manifest or were delayed. Still others feel stuck or had to deal with an unexpected life crisis. I remember a time when I lost my astrologist of fifteen years to retirement, my intuitive advisor of many years died suddenly of cancer, my virtual assistant of seven years and my web designer both moved on to new opportunities, and my hairdresser, Mandy, went out on maternity leave. I also had a number of new health challenges that year and was not able to move ahead as rapidly as I had hoped with my business.
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