Aging is a great place to start in your community resource search—the AoA no doubt has already done most of the research and can point you in the right direction if you are looking for something specific for your loved one.
There is a lot of support and help that a long-distance caregiver can provide without physically being with their loved one. Technology has done a great deal to expand the role of the long-distance caregiver, too. For example, my next-door neighbor grocery-shops for her mom who lives out West and has the groceries delivered to her front door, so her mom doesn’t have to worry about going on her own. Online bill pay is another way long-distance caregivers can use technology to support their loved one.
In addition to the practical support that technology can help you provide, opportunities for emotional connection and relationship-building have increased as well. For instance, platforms like Skype or Facetime are fun ways to connect and interact with them that allow them to see you as you talk. You can also send home movies of yourself and your family that will help keep them engaged and present in your life with them. If your loved one has Alzheimer’s disease or other forms of dementia, you can create videos or a playlist of their favorite sing-along songs. Finding ways to engage with them through technology is a close alternative to being there in person when you live too far away to visit.
Caregivers in the Workplace
I have worked in a variety of settings, but I always seem to encounter a coworker who is also a family caregiver. When I tell them my focus in the aging field, our conversations can quickly become personal. These deeply personal stories of caregiving are becoming more frequent in the workplace. And for these workers, strain from outside stressors undoubtedly has an impact on their productivity and performance. AARP reports that 61 percent of family caregivers are currently employed either full-time or part-time.8 Since this number will only increase in the coming years, this issue demands attention.
For instance, one past coworker, although she made a decent living wage, was concerned that her parents, who never saved for retirement, would be retiring just as her second daughter started college. Since she was responsible for paying for both, she half-humorously joked that she had come to realize she will never be able to afford to retire. Another example happened on the way to lunch the other day. I walked by a woman noticeably upset at the sudden aphasia (a language disorder that affects a person’s speech) her father was experiencing after a recent stroke. She expressed frustration at her inability to understand him, sadness that her father was ill, and exhaustion that now, on top of preparing her kids for a new school year, she would be spending the next few months searching for care facilities. In both cases, and the countless others I have encountered, there is a noticeable trend. As they are speaking, a look of disbelief is in their eyes, a shocked tone is in their voice, and a declarative “I don’t know how I’m going to do it” is said at the end of each story.
Advocates for caregivers push companies to realize the importance of understanding and planning for a workforce made up of family caregivers. And for a good reason: without flexibility and understanding from businesses, caregivers are faced with having to leave the workforce altogether to support the needs of the older adult in their life. Early retirement then puts a strain on their ability to afford their own future care needs.
What Can Employers Do?
First, companies need to accept that this is a workplace issue. They will find that there is a range of policies and programs they can adopt to better support their workforce.
Hold a meeting. You may already have a weekly meeting on the calendar. Take five minutes to announce interest in this initiative, and possibly even to survey how many of the employees are in fact caregivers.
Collect and distribute caregiving resources. AARP is a national leader in advocating for caregivers. Their program ReACT is an online resource designed for the workplace which acquaints employers with best practices to support their workforce and maintain productivity.9
Start a workgroup. Opportunities for employees to meet and discuss shared experiences can do wonders for their mental health. Although this meeting could be held before or after business hours, holding it during office hours ensures that all employees can attend if they want to.
Consider telework and compensatory time. The typical nine-to-five workday is confining and offers little opportunity to schedule medical appointments for our loved ones without having to take time off work. Teleworking and comp time provide flexibility and allow employees to attend appointments while maintaining productivity.
Investing in staff creates a friendlier and more productive workforce. There are a staggering number of caregivers with full-time and part-time jobs, and the number will only increase over the next few years. Employers have an opportunity to not only foster a healthy work environment within their company, but also provide a better quality of life for their employees and, in turn, the older adults who depend on them every day.
The Sandwich Generation
An individual considered part of the Sandwich Generation has a parent over sixty-five and a child under eighteen or a grown child still in need of parental support. Pew Research found that 71 percent are aged forty to fifty-nine and are providing care at both ends of the spectrum at the same time. For many years, Baby Boomers made up the bulk of the Sandwich Generation; however, as Baby Boomers continue to age, they are now being cared for by the next generation of the Sandwiched—Gen X who were born between 1965 and 1979 and are currently between thirty-nine and fifty-three years old.10
The Sandwich Generation makes up the bulk of our workforce, and, while more affluent households ($100,000 a year or more) are more likely to provide this type of care, the Sandwich phenomenon does not discriminate. This generation reports providing care, financial support, and emotional support to both their children and their parents simultaneously. A majority also feel just as obligated to provide for their aging parents during this phase of their life as they do to provide for their children.11
Becoming a caregiver to both parents and children in midlife offers a unique perspective on the spectrum of life. Some caregivers find it humbling and a great honor to be able to provide this kind of love and support to their family. This is a beautiful sentiment that is unique in the caregiving experience, as many of these individuals will learn how to provide care on a variety of levels. However, the financial burden of providing for both children and parents is great, especially as caregivers try to save for retirement. On average, the Sandwich Generation will spend seven thousand dollars in out-of-pocket caregiving costs.12
The Millennial Caregiver
I am a Millennial. I am right on the cusp of the generational shift, and, over the past couple of years, I’ve noticed a distinct change in the conversations I have with others in my cohort. While we discuss near-future decisions like careers, homes, and starting a family, the question of how close to home we should stay becomes a critical factor in the decision-making process. Why wouldn’t it? The comforts of home are attractive to many of us, especially as we get a bit older and feel more inclined to carry on family traditions. Being closer to home also helps if and when close family members start to need additional care or support.
The National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP Public Policy Institute’s report on the Millennial Caregivers says the average age of this cohort’s caregiver is twenty-seven. They are working full-time, half of them live with a spouse or partner, and on average they have graduated high school and taken some college courses. All live with or live close to the care recipient.13
For those who aren’t yet caregivers, the chances of becoming one are incredibly high due to the number of older adults who will be in need of care over the next twenty years. An increased generational focus on higher education and career means that many in the Millennial cohort will start a family and buy a home much later than their parents did.
