Parktails
Douglas G. Campbell
Parktails
Copyright © 2012 Douglas G. Campbell . All rights reserved. Except for brief quotations in critical publications or reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in any manner without prior written permission from the publisher. Write: Permissions, Wipf and Stock Publishers, 199 W. 8th Ave., Suite 3, Eugene, OR 97401.
Resource Publications
An Imprint of Wipf and Stock Publishers
199 W. 8th Ave., Suite 3
Eugene, OR 97401
www.wipfandstock.com
ISBN 13: 978-1-61097-820-0
EISBN 13: 978-1-63087-789-7
Manufactured in the U.S.A.
All scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide.
This tale is dedicated to my sons Joshua and Ian.
Acknowledgments
All books have input other than that of the stated author, so I thank Malcolm R. Campbell, Lesa Campbell, and Rebecca Propst for reading my manuscript, making editorial suggestions, and assisting with proofreading. I thank my two sons Joshua and Ian for giving me the impetus to think about and then write this story. I thank my wife Rebecca for playful banter about animals and their working conditions in national parks, before any words were put on paper.
Critters List
(cast of major characters)
Alexia: a female grizzly bear and Geyser District sheriff
Arachanar: an ancient female spider
Blinkers: a male raccoon, Geyser District secretary, and the narrator
Brogoff: a male bear
Bugler: a large male elk
Cawalla Pan: a male antelope
Cawdor: a male crow
Dozema: a female skunk
Gondzor: a male Canada goose and Geyser District assistant ranger
Grimla: a male mountain lion
Keeble: a female deer
Mendacitus: a large male serpent
Menki: a female eagle
Morgorgor: a wise old female porcupine
Pabatackle: a playful male otter
Quququic: a female warbler
Rittiticket: a male ground squirrel
Romla: a female mountain lion
Rutorina: a female skunk.
Skeezer: old male skunk
Tennial: a male bison and Geyser District deputy sheriff
Thimblewicket: a female ground squirrel
Tromengard: a female moose and Udena’s mother
Udena: a young female moose and Tromengard’s daughter
Wanda: a female moth
Zeecor Manata: a male antelope
Zornova: a female bison and Geyser District ranger
Business as Usual?
Tromengard was on the phone again. Tromengard was so angry it was difficult to understand what she was saying. However, I was able to understand that Thimblewicket, the dispatcher had sent her, no doubt by mistake to a wooded area that was just the worst smoldering blackened mess. “Udena, my daughter and me . . . well I am just livid. I want that crack-brained Thimblewicket to apologize at once. To think that he would send us into a holocaust like that, a wretched smoke-blackened desert, and just after we had taken our morning bath. Gondzor! Gondzor, are you listening to me?”
“Yes, Tromengard, I’m listening,” answered Gondzor, with a sigh, for it had not been a good day. “I will certainly register your complaint and Thimblewicket will be reprimanded if she is to blame. And Tromengard, I am sorry Udena suffered so much from the smoke. I know how delicate and sensitive she is.”
“You can hem and haw all you like, Gondzar,” grumbled Tromengard, “but I am furious. So don’t think you can get away with a mere reprimand. I want Thimblewicket fired!” Apparently Tromengard had slammed down the phone, for Gondzor flinched before he hung up the phone.
Oh it was just a terrible day. And it wasn’t really Thimblewicket’s fault. The scouting reports from the district had been less than adequate since Jet and Cruise were both molting. Jet and Cruise, both red-shouldered hawks, are our best scouts. Some days the Geyser District of the park is just so frazzling that it doesn’t pay to come to work. And Tromengard can be so unpleasant and haughty, even though Gondzor, my boss, is so kind and patient. Oh I do so admire our district’s assistant ranger.
Now look at what I’ve done. I’ve got you all confused no doubt. Perhaps I should sit down and slow down. I know what I will do. I’ll take a deep breath, to calm myself. Aaaaaah. Uuuuuuuh. There, that did help. I suppose that I should introduce myself. I’m Blinkers, Gondzor’s secretary, here at the Geyser District office. I’m the secretary because of my nimble fingers, I’m a raccoon you know, and because I am so fastidious. I am fastidious about my work too. Everything should be put in the right file, all words should be spelled correctly and my life would be so much easier if all the paperwork was turned in according to schedule. Tromengard, for example, is always late with her travel vouchers. But I guess you must expect that from a moose. She says the vouchers are late because Udena is so delicate and needs attention every moment of the day. Udena weighs a delicate 400 pounds even though she isn’t yet a year old, delicate—well really!
Oh my, oh my, I am as jittery as a crawfish. I’ll take another breath. Aaaaaaah. Uuuuuuuh. Buzzzzzzzz!
“Yes, Gondzor, I’ll come right in . . . yes I’ll bring you the labor relations file.” Bugler the elk and Tromengard have been agitating for higher wages and shorter hours for all ungulates in the district. They want more vacation time too.
Gondzor spends most of his time in the small pool in his office when he’s at work. It’s not really unusual; he’s a Canada goose. We work well together, though he does get grumpy when I wash my food in his pool. Now that’s something I’ve never understood. “Gondzor, here you are; these are the files you wanted.”
“Yes,
