“I think it’s kinda funny when Mr. Compton talks to the tree.”
Wooster smiled and said, “Yeah, that is funny, isn’t it? They grinned at one another, and Ronnie pulled the bent licorice from his pocket and began on it. Wooster reached down and pulled another piece from the tub. It was good.
Paul was getting more frustrated by the moment. He stepped back from the tree for a minute, leaving the saw hanging in the latest cut he had inflicted on the trunk. He said out loud to himself, “I think I’ll pick these branches up.” He then began to stack the branches up near the drive so he could later take the whole mess to the dump. It was a good way to step back from his frustrations for a bit. After he had finished picking up the branches, he raked the lawn around the tree, dumping all the twigs and such in his trash can.
“Ok, now I’m ready again,” he said to the wind. And with that he began to push the bow saw back and forth again. It tried to twist and bind on him again, but he was getting the hang of it. He found that if he pressed on the top portion of the trunk, it split the cut wider and allowed the saw to move more freely. So there he worked while Wooster and Ronnie watched. His body leaned into his left hand up above the cut he was making in the trunk, and his right hand did the sawing. He got pretty far through this time before he could no longer move the blade. Of course, when he tried to remove the saw from the trunk, he found it took all his strength. But no matter; he got it out.
Paul figured one more cut on the opposite side and he’d have the top of the trunk off. He set to it after a short breather, during which he looked at the ground around the tree. He was thinking it had to be easier to dig the roots out than it was cutting through the trunk with a bow saw!
Ronnie reached down for his last piece of red licorice while asking, “What’s Mr. Compton doing standing there like that?”
Wooster said casually, “He’s just taking a breath and deciding where to cut next. A man’s gotta plan his work out y’know. Like you planning on where to go through the hedge. You can’t just dive in anywhere.”
Ronnie regarded Wooster for a moment, then said, “Hmmmm.”
Paul went back to work on the trunk, and in twenty minutes or so he was rocking the top back and forth trying to break the last vestiges of pulp holding the pieces together. With a powerful shove, the top came away and teetered off onto the lawn. Ronnie jumped off the rocker and clapped his hands, yelling to Paul, “It’s off!”
Paul looked across the street at the noise and grinned at the boy, taking small bows as though he were in front of an appreciative opera audience screaming “Bravo!”
Wooster, smiling, watched Ronnie clap his hands. At first he wasn’t sure Ronnie was all that excited about watching the cutting of the tree, but apparently he was enjoying the spectacle very much. Wooster shook his head at himself and grinned along with Ronnie. Here he was, eighty plus, and here was Ronnie, ten minus. And there they were cheering for a tree cutting like they were at a World Series game! It tickled Wooster.
Paul sauntered across the street and up onto Wooster’s porch. He nabbed himself a piece of licorice, and settled onto the porch next to Ronnie, smiling a wide grin of triumph. It was nice to see his buffoonery with the tree was getting rave reviews somewhere! He winked at Wooster and said to Ronnie, “So you’re impressed with my lumberjack expertise, eh Ronnie?”
Ronnie gave him a blank stare.
Paul said, “You know what a lumberjack is, Ronnie?”
Ronnie shook his head.
“It’s a man who cuts down trees for a living. Your dad sells furniture for a living, and a lumberjack cuts the trees to get the wood to make the furniture. I’m being a lumberjack this morning.” He gave Ronnie a broad grin and tapped his leg.
Ronnie grinned back and said, “You cut that tree pretty good Mr. Compton.”
Wooster kicked in, “You sure did Paul!” He winked at his friend. They both had done jobs with the wrong kind of tools in their lives and knew the comical outcomes that could be achieved by amateur homeowners!
Paul said, “Well thanks men. I’m thinking of going into the logging business if the stock market plunges.”
Ronnie just nodded as though it was worth considering. Wooster and Paul chuckled at the thought of Paul with a chainsaw. That line from the movie Apocalypse Now ran through Paul’s mind: “The horror. The horror!” He barked a laugh.
“Ok men, I need to proceed to the stump,” said Paul after snagging one more piece of licorice.
As he headed down the walk Wooster called after him, still grinning, “Give ‘em hell boy!” Paul waved a hand without turning.
Ronnie looked at Wooster and said, “My mom says you shouldn’t say bad words Mr. McDowel.”
Wooster nodded and said, “That’s right. I’m sorry Ronnie.”
Ronnie looked at him and said, “Ok.” He then fixed his attention back on Paul and the formidable stump.
The trunk now was but three feet high. Paul figured he could cut a ring around the base in the ground and chop any roots running out from the tree. Then digging a hole around the tree, he could get to the tap root about a foot underground and chop it off. His main implements for this process were going to be one square head spade, one pointed spade, and a hatchet. He mumbled to himself about having a stone ax out here next. Wooster and Ronnie didn’t hear that one.
Loreen came out of the garage just as Paul was beginning to dig the hole around the tree. She glanced across the street and saw Ronnie sitting with Wooster and she shouted, “Hey Ronnie! Are you visiting?” She saw Ronnie sitting with Wooster often.
Ronnie waved back at her and shouted, “Yes! We’re having licorice!” He waggled the remaining half of his last piece at her to prove it.
Loreen shouted back, “Great!” Then she turned to Paul and said, “This is coming right along.” She’d brought a cup of coffee to him, and she handed it over. Working in a nursery she had done plenty of work with trees. But Paul never expected her to do the work at home. He figured it would be overkill to have to do your job at home and at work too. She always argued that he handled their investments and that was his line of work. But he just put his foot down and said, “Well, you handle a lot with the kids too, so it won’t hurt me to do this little bit.” She let him, but wished he’d let her just have some employees at her store do the work. After all, she was the boss. Loreen thought that it was Paul’s upbringing that made him want to handle the yard work. His dad had always done so, or had his boys do it. And they just expected to do it at their own houses. Even if they were not experts. She let it be after a while.
As Paul drank his coffee he said to her, “I think this will go pretty quick.”
Loreen eyed his little hatchet and the spades. She giggled and said, “We’ll see.”
Paul looked at her with mock indignation in his eyes. He said, “Be gone woman! I can see your doubt!” He slapped her butt and pushed her away.
Ronnie giggled and said, “He smacked her bottom, Mr. McDowel.”
Wooster said, “Yep, he sure did. She must have gotten fresh, huh?” He grinned at Ronnie.
Ronnie answered, “My dad does that when I’m really bad. Not very
