Of Death and Grief. S T Kimbrough

      “For being.” The phrase is simple, yet exactly right. Just “being” is a gift that we need to remember to give thanks for. And somehow, that love continues through all the accidents of life, and through the final moment of death. It is not easy to say how this happens. We may believe in heaven, and that we shall meet again on another shore and in a greater light, or we may not. But whether or not we have such a belief, there is a sense that love continues beyond the last embrace, or the last kiss on the forehead. Death is a farewell, but one in which we carry with us the knowledge that parting is in some ways impossible. It is like the end of Sarah Doudney’s beautiful hymn, “Sleep on belovèd, sleep, and take thy rest”: “Good night! Good night! Good night!” Doudney’s note reminds us that the early Christians were accustomed to bid their dying friends “Good night”; and that hymn carries with it the thought that has been a part of the encounter with death for more than a thousand years: Requiescat in Pace, “Rest in Peace.” And yet it also has the simplicity of a familiar action, the last words spoken before going to sleep. The ordinary words of daily life are used here to say a last farewell: it is part of the way in which life and death, love and grief, are inextricably and mysteriously combined.

      These poems are a moving personal record of a precious relationship. But they are also addressed to all those who are striving to come to terms with loss and bereavement. This little book will be to those who mourn, a comfort to the brave hearts who grieve at a time that we all have to face at some point in our lives.

J. Richard Watson1

      Durham, UK

1. J. Richard Watson is Emeritus Professor of English, University of Durham, UK, and a long-time friend of Dr. S T Kimbrough, Jr.

      Preface

      The Story Behind the Poems

      This little book of poems reveals how I have dealt with the grief that accompanied the death of my wife, Sarah, the love of my life for fifty-nine years. The poems are a conversation with myself on the journey through the grieving process, which perhaps has no end. Yes, they are permeated with a deep faith that there is more to life than merely living and dying. At the same time, they are honest responses to how painful it is to lose one’s life partner. We had a wonderful life together, which took me through three collegiate degrees, including a Ph.D., all of which I could never have accomplished without her support, and took her also through three diplomas, R.N., B.A., and M.A. She bore four wonderful sons who more than anything taught us how to live and the value of loving one another passionately.

      When I published books, her read-through of a manuscript was essential, and she was often my best critic. When I sang opera in Europe, where we lived for many years, at a final dress rehearsal before an opening night she would often sit in the theater and take notes, which were often invaluable in shaping my performance.