you suspect foul play?”
“Among other things, yes.”
The whole apartment was the epitome of modesty and simplicity. A light tight-weave carpet covered the floor. A couch, a coffee table, two living room chairs, and a rocker filled up the small living room accompanied by the smallest flat screen TV either of them had ever seen. A bookcase covered almost an entire wall. Carmelita went through a few of the books to see if anything might be hidden in them that would be a clue. She found nothing.
The kitchen was spotless and organized, without anything obvious that was amiss and no signs of foul play. Carmelita opened the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. The toothpaste was still there, along with his toothbrush and comb.
They circled back toward the single bedroom. Two suitcases were in the closet. They went back downstairs.
They discovered the refrigerator shelves in the diner virtually full of pre-cooked lasagna, just waiting to be reheated. Out in the storage shed, they found loaf upon loaf of garlic bread and in the freezer, an abundance of ice cream. One refrigerator was packed tight with more lasagna and the other had milk and orange juice.
“What could this be about?” Carmelita mused out loud.
Sally spoke up. “Carmelita, where did the extra tables and chairs come from, and how did they get here, and why did no one see anyone at all here doing anything?”
“My guess is, as wild and as crazy as it seems, that Joe has somehow provided this for us as the meal after the parade.”
“But it won’t be nearly enough,” Sally said. “There are hundreds of people down there getting ready for this parade.”
“You tell me what it’s all about then,” said Carmelita. “Do you have lasagna on your menu? Last time I checked, you didn’t.”
“Well, we could serve what’s here until it runs out.”
“Maybe it won’t.”
“Won’t what?”
“Maybe it won’t run out at all.”
Chapter 20
There were a number of families in the Always Sunny Homeless Shelter who were excited that they were going to be in a parade. A few of the long-time residents at the shelter were known by the community. What surprised Luther most, though, was the people from his membership that showed up to ride the church bus, some of the ones he would least expect!
Maxine Olmay complained regularly about the people who used the shelter as dirty and unkempt. She was the first to board the bus.
Durwood Slaussenger showed up too. Luther had once described him to Father Callaghan as a real gadfly and a pain in the neck. He felt his gut tighten when he saw the old antagonist. What was he up to? He always had an agenda. What would he say? What would he do?
You never knew, but when he did it or said it, Luther would say to himself, “Of course. I should have thought of that!”
“Nice to see you, Durwood,” he lied.
“I just thought I would come and see what was going on,” he said.
“I’ll bet you did,” Luther thought to himself.
Jack and Laura Dunn came next. He could always depend upon them to provide the fresh air of sanity at Always Sunny. Emily Hooten, President of the Women for World Mission, was no surprise. Parishioners always told Luther that she did a lot of good and the harm she did ought to be ignored.
Priscilla Coover, who Luther suspected had a crush on him, boarded the bus breezily. “Good morning, dear Luther!” she said with too much familiarity and overblown cheer in her voice. Her hand reached out to touch his shoulder as she walked by his seat on the bus. He tried not to flinch.
Zeke Daniels, the church sexton, who was driving the bus, called out “All right, everybody! We’re off to the parade. Sit down. Shut up. Look out the windows and wave for Always Sunny!”
“I wish I could get away with that at a Vestry meeting, Zeke!” Pastor Luther said.
“You had better not try that!” said Emily who had not perceived Luther’s comments as intended humor. “That’s not preacher talk!”
“By the way, thanks for the invitation,” Maxine Olmay spoke up.
“Invitation?”
“I know your work when I see it! Don’t feign surprise to me. There was an engraved invitation on my doorstep at 7:00 a.m. Somebody rang the doorbell, but when I got to the door, nobody was there. Instead, here was this invitation stuck in my screen door.”
“Don’t know anything about it!” Luther said.
“Right!” Durwood remarked, dryly.
“You, too?” asked Maxine.
“Same thing about ten after seven this morning.”
Luther’s head was spinning. Who would do this? He wanted to think it was someone who didn’t like him who was making sure the church antagonist and his worst critics were all in one place with him. But, he couldn’t imagine who that might be and, besides, who would have the time to do something like that? Everybody was so busy getting the parade together!
“So how many got invitations?” asked Emily.
“I did,” said Priscilla. “I am sure I smelled your cologne on it, Luther, so don’t deny it is your handiwork!”
“I did!” a half dozen people called out. Those at the homeless shelter had received the same engraved invitation as the church members.
“Who did it say it was from?” asked Luther.
“It was more like where it was from!” said Durwood.
“The card was from some outfit called the Isle of Gemma, LLC!” said Laura.
She had brought their invitation in her purse. She took it out of the envelope and read it out carefully. “You are cordially invited to ride the Always Sunny Church bus in the Safety Harbor Parade, Sunday, July 6.”
“Gemma means “pearl” in Latin,” said Zeke.
Everyone on the bus wanted to know how Zeke, of all people, would know that, but common courtesy kept them from asking, with the exception of Emily, of course, who bluntly asked, “How would a sexton and bus driver know that?”
No one said anything.
“Well, in case you wanted to know how a working man like me knows such a thing,” he said, as if Emily hadn’t made a comment at all, “I’m taking painting lessons from Susanna. We talk a little about everything when we are painting together. She’s been teaching me a little Greek, a little Latin, a little of this and that. She says I might even become cosmopolitan soon!”
“Serves you right!” Luther thought.
“Do you
