The Patsy Returns. J. Thomas Ford

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from now. That’s why I got in contact with you, Timothy.”

      “Why me?” I wanted to know.

      “I have a subscription to your magazine. I’ve read most of your work and I believe you might want to know what actually happened that day?”

      “I do, of course.” He nodded.

      “I thought so.”

      “Does anyone know you are here?”

      He glanced around and gave me a look that seemed to imply, are you kidding?

      “Just you...I hope.”

      A moment later, he added,

      “I haven’t been in touch with them for years.”

      “Are they still paying you?”

      “Once a month, like clockwork.”

      “How does the money come?”

      “It is deposited into my Swiss bank account.”

      “What do you think would happen if they found out you were here?”

      “Worst case scenario? I suppose I could end up dead. But, something tells me that’s not going to happen.”

      He was probably right about that, for two reasons that I could think of on the spot. Number one, they’re all retired, maybe even dead, and the second reason is that no one cares anymore about what happened in Dealy Plaza.

      We decided to take a five minute break.

      The first thing I wanted to do was reassure him.

      “I’m on your side, Lee.”

      “Good, all I want to do is to get my version of the events out there for the American people so they can make the right decision about what happened that day.”

      “And I want to help you do that, Lee, but you must understand that this magazine is part of the media and whatever comes of your story is going to be questioned, especially by those in power who are still spouting all the garbage that was initiated by the Warren Commission. So, what I am saying is that I must be as objective as I can possibly be and maybe even allow the Warren Commission Apologist’s to have their say in answer to what you are saying. If I have to do that, I can tell you that it will be loathsome for me, but as the owner of this magazine I will do what I have to do, even when I know that these people will be spouting their usual lies.”

      Oswald stood up and went over to the window that looks out onto Broadway and didn’t say anything for a moment or two. I could see that he was anxious, even sweating a little.

      I have to remember that this was not a young man and I had best be careful. I didn’t want him having a heart attack in my office. God forbid.

      He sat back down.

      “Slow down, Lee. Take your time and tell me all about it, step by step, as it comes into your head.” In the middle of the coffee table was water and a bowl of fruit. I poured him a glass of water and pushed the bowl of fruit (with apples, oranges and tangerines) in his direction.

      “Thank you,” he said. He raised his glass and took a long drink. I waited until he put the glass back down on the table. He took a deep breath.

      3

      Oswald wanted me to understand what happened when he decided to defect to Russia.

      “On the one hand, I was curious and I wanted to improve my ability to speak the Russian language.”

      “Did you have a reason for wanting these things, Lee?”

      “Of course, I had a reason, more than one, as a matter of fact. But, the main reason, I suppose, was that I was looking for adventure. After all, I was only nineteen at the time. What did you want to do when you were nineteen, Timothy?”

      I thought about it for a minute.

      “I guess you could say that I was interested in girls.”

      “There you go, same as me. I was a virgin and I wanted to sleep with as many Russian women as I could find willing to put up with my behavior which, at the time, had a tendency to be obnoxious.”

      “How did that work out for you?”

      “Pretty good, if I don’t say so myself.”

      “What about the KGB?”

      “What about them?”

      “Did they interfere with your plans?”

      He smiled.

      “No, as a matter of fact, they helped me along by sending girls over to my apartment to find out what they could about me.”

      “Why, were you a danger to them?”

      “Not really, but they thought I was, I guess.”

      “What did you expect? You did go there under certain pretenses, didn’t you, Lee?”

      “At that age, I did a lot of things that I regret now.”

      “Why didn’t they just torture you and find out whatever it was they were looking for?”

      “They tried interrogating me, keeping me awake, threatening me, but none of it worked. Besides, I was a Marine and I was beyond stubborn.”

      “Did you tell them anything?”

      “Yes, of course. I told them a bunch of lies, details I made up and other stuff that was no longer secret. In fact, I got so good at hiding the truth from them they were convinced that I was connected to American intelligence.”

      “What did that do for you?”

      “At first, nothing. In fact, they said they were going to send me back to the states.”

      “Why didn’t they?”

      “I slit my wrists and was sent to the hospital.”

      “What was their reaction to that, Lee?”

      “It confused them, and when the Colonel who was in charge came to visit me in the hospital, he asked me why I had done that. Was I depressed?”

      “I told them that I was because I was a Marxist and I really just wanted to stay in their country.”

      “What did he make of that?”

      “He yelled at me, and told me that I was making his job harder than it had to be.”

      “What did you say to that?”

      “I told him that I couldn’t help myself and that I was sorry for the trouble I was causing him.”

      “What

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