who is he? Is he hot like me?”
“Yes. He’s hot like you.”
“You’re doing that thing with sarcasm again, aren’t you?”
I smirked and wrapped up the notebook and keys the way we’d found them. Yeah, I know—keeping it was very unprofessional, not to mention stupid, but I was curious as all hell, and I was itching for something a little more intriguing than skip tracing and tracking cheaters.
* * * *
Later at Ernie’s, I had already completely inventoried the Caprice, and done the Condition Report before Seth finally rolled in with the hotwired Corvette. It’s a damn fine thing Ernie is a good sport. When Seth still hadn’t shown up fifteen minutes after I arrived, and Ernie was looking a little concerned, I told him I thought Seth might be taking the ’Vette for a test drive. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Ernie laugh so hard.
When Seth did show up, he pulled up next to us and climbed out, giving me a wicked leer and a shit-eating grin. I was shocked to realize I knew damn well he had a hard-on. Ernie tried to give him a sales pitch on the car.
“Seth!” I yelled. “We have three more to do, and a pile of paperwork for this. Get your ass in gear.”
Seth flipped me off. “Hey, Ernie,” he said, “have you read the Nero Wolfe books?”
“Sure,” Ernie said, nodding. “Those are pretty good reads.”
“Who is Fred Durkin?”
I steered Seth away and shoved him in the direction of the three vehicles we had left to do. Behind us, Ernie yawned and trudged into his office. He’d been dragging all morning, and I wondered what was up. Ernie is usually a pretty perky guy.
Twenty minutes was all it took for us to get done. I tucked the paperwork into my briefcase and went to tell Ernie we’d have the finished reports for him as soon as possible.
“Thanks,” he said choking back another yawn. “Sandra will have your check ready, and you can come get it anytime you want, unless you’d rather have her just mail it.”
“Great. I’ll come and get it, I don’t trust the mail at the new place yet. What’s up with you, don’t you sleep at night?”
“Nothing serious. The alarm went off in the wee hours of the morning, that’s all. It’s not a big deal, happens every couple of months, short in the system or bird hitting the window or whatever. But it’s a pain in the ass, because I have to get out of bed and come down here to meet with the police to make sure everything’s all right.”
“And was it?” I asked, because I didn’t think this was any short in the system.
Seth had just stepped in the door and gave me a dubious look.
“Yep, everything’s accounted for and nothing’s broken. You know, the only time I’ve ever actually been robbed was in broad daylight when some punk took a Firebird out for a test drive and just kept on going.”
“Yeah...” I said, rubbing the back of my neck. “I think this was more than a bird hitting the window. I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if it was that crackpot I told you about who jumped the ’Vette.”
“You think?” Ernie looked completely dumbfounded. “I suppose anything’s possible. I’m glad he didn’t tear the place up when he didn’t find the car. That was good thinking, you guys. Anyway, my buddy’s going to keep an eye on the place for a few days.”
“Good plan,” I told him. “Get some sleep tonight.”
It was time for lunch when we got out of there, so I offered to buy Seth a quick sandwich if he’d help me do the paperwork before we started cleaning the storefront.
There’s a lot of paperwork involved in doing repossessions. I don’t mind it so much. I happen to be one of those rare people who doesn’t hate paperwork with a passion. I love to sit down with a full “In” box around lunch time and end up with an empty one just in time to go out and get some dinner. Seth, however, hates paperwork and complains like a baby, so he ended up in a mood similar to mine of that morning.
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