and she didn’t want to get out, but Bull hollered for her. She put on one of her new gowns and robes that Bull had got her, and came out of the bathroom a little hesitant because it was so thin you could see almost everything right through it. Bull had already changed into a funny looking robe and he didn’t have no pants on because she could see his bare legs shining. Understanding that she had to sleep in the same bed with Bull, since Clive and Dorie did and they was married, she was uncertain and didn’t quite know what she was supposed to do.
To her horror, Jewel soon found out that Dorie wasn’t lying when she’d told her what husbands and wives did in the bed. Running her hand over the soft cotton chenille of the bedspread, she wasn’t aware when Bull locked the door. Coming up from behind her, he grabbed her around the waist and threw her down on the bed, ripping her new nightgown right off before she even knew what he was doing. When he pulled her panties down and off her feet, she thought she’d die of shame. He fell on top of her and was putting his slobbery mouth all over her face and she was struggling, kicking her legs, and beating him on the back, trying to get him off of her. She was scared within an inch of her life!
“Stop it, Bull! Yer hurtin’ me! Yer heavier ’an lead.” Grabbing at her tit, she thought Bull was gonna tear it off and she couldn’t scream because every time she tried, he’d put his big old mouth over hers again and durn near smother her.
Jewel felt the hard thing between her legs, trying to push into her toosie and it hurt something fierce and she was trying to hold her legs together so he couldn’t do what Dorie had told her. She begged him to stop, that it was killing her, but Bull wouldn’t, just brought his knee up and spread her legs apart. She cried, she pleaded, but nothing worked. Felt like he was breaking through bones and she bit her fist to keep from screaming. But he finally broke through the barrier that was hurting her so bad, and then it didn’t hurt that bad anymore. He grunted like an old pig going up and down on top of her with that big ole thing pushing in and out till finally, she felt something warm gushing up inside of her and he collapsed right down on her and quit pushing. Jewel was never so glad of anything in her life. She couldn’t understand what happened to Bull, because one minute his thing was hard as a rock and the next minute it wasn’t nothing but soft and mushy like a old dead snake and he was breathing real hard in her ear.
Was this what women traded for room and board? Had she traded a life of pain for a car and some new clothes? She thought of all the wives sitting in church and couldn’t imagine them ever doing nothing like what she just done. Evidently Clive and Dorie did because she was the one who told her about it. Why would they want to do it for? And then she remembered that Dorie told her it was how you got a baby growing in yer belly. Did Bull want her to get a baby? He must, awful bad, or he wouldn’t a done nothing like that.
Why didn’t her brothers try harder to keep her from going with Bull? If Dorie knew all about this nasty and painful stuff you did when you was married, then Clive did, too, and had to know what Bull would do to her. Right then, she didn’t think much of her brothers. And she downright hated Bull Howser.
When Bull got his breath back, he got up off her and went to the bathroom where he stayed for a long time and it give her some time to get herself together. He hadn’t even said a word to her, but it coulda been because she wouldn’t even look at him. She laid there and cried and thought about going back home but Bull wouldn’t never take her back to Clive and Dorie’s. Jewel was now his wife and she’d said for better or worse, and it scared her to death! She was stuck with him. When she finally got up off the bed, though, something was running down her legs and she looked down and saw blood and some snotty looking stuff just running down. Scared the life right out of her! She went flying to the door of the bathroom and yelled at Bull that she was bleeding out of her toosie where he’d stuck his thing in there.
Jewel must undoubtedly be the dumbest girl he’d ever seen in his entire life. Didn’t even know that women bled the first time. She was fifteen, for gosh sake. She should know something. Hell, he reckoned he’d have to teach her a few things.
“That’s normal, honey. All girls bleed the first time.” And couldn’t keep the laughter out of his voice, not that he tried. Jewel heard him making fun of her. Did he think it was funny that she was bleeding? “Come in here and get a towel and wipe it off. Won’t hurt you none. It’ll be better next time.”
Next time? She didn’t want no next time! Maybe she’d already got a baby and he wouldn’t have to do that no more. But she put on what was left of her robe and went in and got a wet washcloth and still not looking at Bull, went back into the bedroom and wiped off her legs and toosie. It was sore, but she figured she was none the worse for wear because she could still walk. When she started to put the washcloth back in the sink, Bull grabbed her and pulled her down on his lap right there on the commode where he was taking a shit.
She fought him, trying to get up off his lap, but he wouldn’t let her up. “My baby. My little baby,” Bull was murmuring over and over. “I didn’t mean to hurt you but you jus’ been teasin’ me all this time, and I couldn’t help myself.” He grabbed ahold of her tit and stuck the nipple in his mouth and sat there and sucked it like a baby.
Jewel was scared of what he might do next and was mortified at first that he’d suck on her tits but then it started feeling pretty good. She didn’t mind this part. If she’d let him do this every once in a while, would he still buy her pretty clothes and rings like the one he’d got her? That wouldn’t be so awful bad.
But in the middle of the night, after Bull was sound asleep and snoring up a storm, Jewel was still awake, pondering on everything that had happened to her. She’d actually liked that titty sucking part and wondered if mommies felt that way when a baby was sucking milk out of their tits. Jewel hadn’t had any intimate conversations with women. Hadn’t had anyone to tell her what to expect as a woman. All she had was her brothers. And then Dorie had explained a few things to her about being married.
Thank goodness, Dorie had been there when she started having her monthly, because it scared the mortal fire out of her. Thinking she must a got cut, she’d run in the house from the toilet and stuffed some old rags in her panties even though she didn’t feel like she was cut anywhere. She went back to the yard where Dorie was working in the flowers and told her that she must a cut herself down there because she was bleeding something awful. And that’s when Dorie explained about her monthly, and that she could get a baby now. Then Dorie sat in the swing and told her what husbands and wives did to get them. She didn’t mention it again. Jewel thought she must be lying because nobody would do such a thing. And Clive and Dorie didn’t have no young’uns and they’d been married a long time.
The next morning, Jewel woke up and for a moment, didn’t know where she was. She soon learned though, because Bull grabbed her. His thing was hard as a rock and he wanted to stick it in her again, and she didn’t want him to. He kept kissing her and she didn’t like that because his breath stunk something awful and she wanted to get up out of the bed, but he held her in there and wouldn’t let her get up. She was scared to death, but figured she might as well get it over with because she wanted to get back in that shower again. Jewel tensed herself for the pain that was to come, but this time it didn’t hurt near as bad. She was sore, and had some bruises on her legs, but she didn’t feel that awful pain like she’d felt the night before. Maybe she’d get through this marrying thing after all. Dorie had said it was downright pleasurable. She sure wouldn’t go that far, but she didn’t think she’d dread it like she did. And Bull was right, she didn’t bleed this time. If Bull would buy her pretty stuff, she’d let him do that any time he wanted to.
After Bull got through with her, he went out somewhere and got them breakfast while she got back in the shower. When she come out, he had her clothes laid out on the bed that she was supposed to wear that day. At the time, Jewel didn’t know, but Bull would choose her clothes for a very long time. Then they drove for hours and hours, with Jewel being amazed at all
