FEED YOUR SOUL, STARVE YOUR EGO. bayu purnomo

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FEED YOUR SOUL, STARVE YOUR EGO - bayu purnomo

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      Searching for a purpose, or meaning in life is a common journey many people take. With all the gifts we have been blessed with as humans it’s hard not to believe that we should be doing more than just surviving, we should thrive, each and every one of us. To thrive does not simply mean to be prosperous and have more than enough money; it’s also a state of mind. There are plenty of people with plenty of money and material items that many of us would love to have, but these same people are often still unhappy and empty. As a result they continue to obtain more material things. However the happiness or joy from obtaining that new item is only temporary and they are soon on to the pursuit of the next item. Or they may seek drugs and alcohol to alter their reality and allow them to ignore that feeling inside of them that they’re still not happy or fulfilled. The result is the same though, the effect is not long lasting and they’re usage increases over time. To be prosperous takes more than the physical evidence such as the big home, luxurious car, and big bank account, you must also feel that you are flourishing, that your existence, who you are, and what you do is important and improves your own life, as well as the lives of others. If you feel as though what you do is improving your own life and the life of others then your work will be filled with positive energy making it a pleasant experience that you will naturally want to put more energy into, to create and experience more positive energy.

      If we feel as though our work benefits us, simply because it affords us a home, car, and a general lifestyle that is enjoyable, but at the same time we feel as though we’re getting the best of others in the deal, then guilt may linger somewhere inside of us. Or maybe we don’t feel as though our work is taking advantage of others negatively but we feel as though it’s not utilizing our own unique abilities and strengths, so we may feel guilty of not doing enough; of wasting time or a specific gift we may possess such as the ability to paint, draw, write, speak, motivate, or problem solve; the list of potential gifts we may hold is endless.

      Guilt is a negative energy and will naturally deter us from wanting to put more energy into our work, in order to avoid this negative energy. The ironic result here is that our attempt to avoid the negative energy by avoiding our work will only bring forth more negativity because our work will then not yield what we need or want from it such as the promotion, and or raise. We will begin to see work, paying bills, buying groceries, and anything even loosely associated to work or what our work affords us, as negatives. We have to work to pay the bills, and we dislike work. We have to work to feed our self, and we dislike work. We have to work to have money to go out and enjoy time with friends and family, “to have a life” and now we HATE our work, because we have to do it, as opposed to having a desire or even better a true passion to do it.

      I use the example of work not because I believe work should be a major aspect to your life but because for most of us it simply is. It’s become a reality of the modern world, we eat sleep, and work. If we can find work that affords us the lifestyle we desire but also fulfills us and gives us a sense of accomplishment and importance then we will find enjoyment in what for many is simply a necessity; a means to survive in the modern world, not something they derive happiness or fulfillment from.

      In the end, finding our place and purpose is a struggle; the human condition we are all born into. I hope the following chapters will assist you in finding your place and purpose in life and steer you towards your individual greatness.

      The Soul vs. The Ego

      Passion will become poison if not fulfilled. However, before attempting to fulfill that passion we must determine the origin of the passion. Passion can arise from two places within us; our soul, which emits true passion, or our ego that emits false passion.

      Our soul is not something created, it’s not something that has a beginning and an end, a creation and demise; it simply is and always will be. It’s the piece of us that connects us to this world, which makes us a part of it. Atoms are the physical component, the common factor between us and everything else in our universe because atoms are the building blocks of all things in our universe. Our soul is the driving force organizing the atoms that make up our physical being. It’s a piece of the power, the hand that created everything. It’s the intangible common factor between us and the universe.

      It is not my intention to prove or disprove the existence of God, or a god, but I see it difficult to not acknowledge that something has set things in motion and has seen to it that there is order in the world as opposed to chaos. Weather patterns, seasons, migration routes, all are cyclical and exist without our control or influence. An animal dies in the wild and scavengers feed, fruit falls from a tree, some spawning a new generation of trees others providing nourishment to animals. Point being, there is reason and order in this world even with the absence of humans intervening, so there must be some other guiding force. Even within us there are examples of a power beyond our control, influence and knowledge. One example being stems cells. Stem cells are undifferentiated cells with the potential to become a specialized cell such as a skin, muscle or bone cell. But who or what is giving the orders? Telling each stem cell where to go and what to be? It must be the force behind the rest of the universe, the same force that we each carry a piece of inside us. Our soul is ultimately the one in charge (or should be in charge), drawing up the blue prints (DNA) and seeing that they are adhered to. The soul has no beginning and therefore has no end; it just is.

      In contrast we also have a similar entity or force within us; our ego. However our ego does have a beginning and therefore also has an end. Our ego is a creation of our brain, our central nervous system. Its creation is associated with the development of our brain; as we become more self aware as a child and begin to form a self-image. Our self-image as a child is similar to a tadpole that is gradually developing into a frog. As our ego develops it begins to encompass greater fields beyond how we see ourselves. It begins to form opinions and ideas on what we will be, what we deserve, and where we stand in relation to others; “I’m going to be a doctor”, “I should have one of those”, “I’m better than them”, “they’re better than me”,

      The state of our ego is dependent upon our circumstances. If we’ve just experienced success then it is bold and confident, willing to take a chance. If we just suffered a loss, or failed to obtain something we felt we deserved or wanted badly it is fearful and reluctant to take a chance; to reach outside its comfort zone. In the midst of success our ego has an insatiable appetite no material item, no relationship, no success is enough; it must always have more. In the midst of hardships, it has little or no appetite; it seeks to withdraw, to hide from others, from the world, to avoid chance and risk. To meet someone new is a risk, for they may disappoint, to buy something new and expensive is a risk, for we may lose our job tomorrow or the opposite may be employed “we may not have this money tomorrow so we should use it now”, to call a friend is a risk, for they may not answer or they may not understand, all actions are seen as a risk and therefore no action is taken.

      Depression is a condition that grows from the ego; our ego may be in a state of joy living the life it feels it deserves, be it a high paying job, a great husband, wife, boyfriend or girlfriend whatever it may be. And then that job, that relationship, or both is gone; the company goes under, or downsizes to prevent going under, the significant other has a change of heart, and takes off down a new path in life that doesn’t include us, and our ego is crushed. It begins to question if we deserved what we had in the first place, is this new place where we belong? Will we always end up in this place of sadness and disappointment? No matter how hard we try to escape it?

      Depression cannot exist in the soul, because the soul has no beginning, and no end, it will always be. The ego knows it will not last forever; it attempts to exist under this shadow, this truth (to the ego) that the end is coming and as a result fears everything it perceives as bad. The ego thinks, “I don’t want to die single, unattached, or alone”, “I don’t want to die poor”, “I don’t want to die unhappy”. These worries don’t exist within the soul. Death or the end isn’t a concern for the soul because there isn’t any; time is unlimited. As a result the soul can

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