asked Lucy.
With some effort, the spider picked up a pen and began writing in elegant script.
The girl peered through the glass to see the words: “Welcome to the Animal House. We have been expecting you.” Lucy stared in amazement. Never could she have imagined that a spider could write a note. She would never stomp on a bug again! The spider picked up the pen again and wrote, “P.S. There is someone who is keen to meet you.” No sooner had she read this post-script she felt a gentle nibble on her toes.
“I say — what lovely shoes!” said a caramel coloured rabbit at her feet.
Noting Lucy’s look of astonishment, the rabbit offered, “Please do excuse me, I am terribly sorry! But I simply cannot resist fine shoes…a terrible, terrible habit of mine.”
The rabbit wiped a paw on her blue velvet jacket and outstretched it the girl: “Lady Speaker is the name, pleased to make your acquaintance.”
Lucy was startled by the exchange. Never, in her wildest dreams had she imagined conversing with a rabbit and a spider! But there was little time to contemplate this oddity because before she knew it, Lady Speaker was tugging impatiently at her pinafore.
“Now I am glad that you have arrived safely,” she said, “but I’m afraid we don’t have much time. Quickly now, follow me.”
II – The House Divided
Lady Speaker led the girl down a series of narrow corridors carpeted in green and adorned with portraits of important looking animals. It was difficult to keep up with the rabbit, as she hopped this way and that. They rushed past doors with brass plaques with names such as “The Queen’s Chamber,” and “The Prime Minister’s Suite.”
Lucy saw creatures scuttling back and forth, piled high with documents and folders labelled with “Cabinet-in-Confidence” and “Memorandum of Understanding.” She almost tripped on a small brown field mouse that declared, “Pardon, oh pardon me!” sending documents into a flurry as he ran past.
Finally, the rabbit and the girl arrived at a grand entrance. Lady Speaker whispered to Lucy, “this is the House of Representatives — where every decision affecting every animal is made.”
Lady Speaker turned the polished brass handles and the great doors parted. A thunderous roar resounded through the chamber. Never had Lucy seen so many animals gathered. Creatures of all colours and breeds sat in rows. A kaleidoscope of feathers cascaded from the upper gallery, as a pink galah swooped down and landed on a circular bench, which formed the first of many rows.
Moments later, a scrawny weasel scurried in, casting suspicious glances over his shoulder, before meandering over to a leopard, which gingerly licked a vermilion stain from his paw. Lucy saw the great cat look in Lady Speaker’s direction, as he hissed wryly to the weasel, “Mmm, rabbit season!” Despite looking the other way, Lucy was certain that she heard the softest of “thumps” coming from the rabbit’s direction.
As Lucy looked around, she felt the heavy gaze of other animals staring back. She saw a mother duck whisper excitedly to her brood, and a grey goose gossiping with a prairie dog, which immediately looked in the girl’s direction.
Lady Speaker whispered, “Follow me,” and the pair made their way to the front. Silence befell the chamber as the rabbit leaped onto a great chair made of carved mahogany, with a coat of arms at its head and a green velvet seat. A black Scottish terrier placed a green cushion on the floor beside it and directed Lucy to sit.
“These are testing times," Lady Speaker began, addressing the circular rows of animals. “There are those among us who believe in the importance of pure breeds and seek to exclude other animals from Parliament.”
Lucy saw feathers fly and claws stretch. Sensing a cold gaze, she turned to see a brown spoodle studying her. The dog, named Mr Hughes, looked away as soon as their eyes met, and muttered in the ear of his off-sider, Contessa — an immaculately preened King Charles Cavalier. Contessa surveyed Lucy and turned up her little black nose.
The chamber erupted into a raucous, and Lady Speaker cried, “Order, order!” Different animals, in turn, offered their contributions to the debate. A majestic peacock raised the problematic implications of excluding others from Parliament. “It is a regressive and discriminatory policy!” he boldly declared, as a mottled cat called Mr Mog slinked into the shadows.
But then the spoodle took the stand. “My dear associates!” he languidly purred, “I am sure that all of us can appreciate the need for…” he carefully chose his words, “the purity and integrity of our nation’s leaders.” A small cohort of animals applauded, led by Contessa who was clearly in rapture. “Politics,” the spoodle continued, “is murky enough without adding mutts into the equation.”
The session proceeded, with arguments emphatically made in favour and against the purity of breeds. As the discussion became more heated, boos and hisses emanated from the back benches. Lady Speaker drew the meeting to a close, declaring that the bill proposed by Mr Hughes required further deliberation, and would be reviewed at a more opportune time.
The Hansardist tabled the close of the sitting, and the animals poured out of the chamber. As the banter trailed down the corridor, Lady Speaker collected her papers and switched off the great chandelier that hung high above the parliament and acted as a bright beacon of justice and revelation. In the dark, the chamber had a very different feel, as ominous shadows gave the space a spectral quality. The rabbit silently observed the girl and then simply said, “Let us go.”
The hour was late, and the last of the pink galahs were settling into their nests for the evening. Mr and Mrs Platt would be completing their ablutions and preparing for bed, thinking that Lucy was having a merry old time at her sleepover with “that lovely Bronny.”
“It is late, and you must be famished,” said Lady Speaker. “I have something warm for you on my stove.”
And so, with no other plans, Lucy gratefully accepted Lady Speaker’s invitation. She followed the rabbit down through a series of tunnels, far beneath the Animal House. It was a secret world that Lucy could never have imagined in her wildest dreams. All of her senses were intensified — attuned to the heady scent of overgrown moss, and the magnified sounds of dripping pipes and scuttling beasts. In this dark and unfamiliar realm, the girl had no option but to trust the rabbit, who led her further and further away from the world she knew.
Finally, they arrived at a round wooden door. A bronze plate stated, “Speaker’s Residence.” As Lady Speaker welcomed her in, Lucy looked around in wonder. She had never been inside a rabbit’s burrow before. It had low vaulted ceilings and flickering lanterns affixed to walls that lit up portraits of rabbits in corduroy jackets and feathered hats. Many of them had bronze plates with descriptions such as “Judge Thomas James and Dame Allegra Rose at the Duke’s Garden Party” or “Senators Oliver, Daniel and Nicholas in the Conservatory.”
Lucy determined that some must be Lady Speaker’s ancestors, for they had her characteristic caramel hued fur. In one painting, an elegant rabbit wore a top hat and
