harder, you won’t pass this term,” or “Don’t let me catch you smoking.”
They are still interested in what you’re up to, but the awareness of your growing independence, means they do not want to interfere too much. When they warn you about riding your bicycle safely or studying harder, it’s because they are concerned about your safety and your future. Don’t take it as personal criticism.
When you’re moody, you’ll say things you don’t really mean. Afterwards you’ll feel like kicking yourself for being so rude. Rather ask for forgiveness the moment you realise you were wrong. Remember, your parents and care-givers work hard to look after the home and family and they are entitled to your respect. When children are too rebellious and parents are too proud to give in, it creates an unpleasant atmosphere and the parent-child relationship suffers. Psychologists call this situation the generation gap – where communication between the parent and child is nearly impossible. Please don’t let your defiance drives a wedge between you and your parents.
When your father (or father figure) reprimands you, rather say, “Okay, I’ll see what I can do.” This way, you can ease the situation and at the same time make them realise that you still need them and value their attention. For example, say, “When are we going fishing again?” Try to think of something you can do together.
When you are alone with your father, use the opportunity to have a man-to-man talk with him about things that bother you. What career does he think you should be looking at? How should you attract the attention of a cute girl? Does he think it’s okay to go out with a girl at your age and, if not, why not? Or you can ask his advice on how to improve your sporting skills.
Do you know how much your father will appreciate it if, in passing, you touch his arm or punch him playfully? Just to show him that your feelings haven’t changed and that you’re glad he’s your dad. Your mom will be delighted if you surprise her with a hug and a kiss. People shouldn’t share the same house if they never interact with one another. If you can help to create a more pleasant atmosphere at home, you will get on better with your parents – and probably find that they will cut you more slack.
But before this sermon gets too long, let’s rather talk about other interesting experiences in your life. Such as what exactly is happening to your body and what is causing your new interest in girls.
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