Bitch, please! I'm Khanyi Mbau. Lesley Mofokeng

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Bitch, please! I'm Khanyi Mbau Lesley Mofokeng

      To my Mother, to my Gogo

      Khanyi Mbau

      To all dreamers and hustlers

      Lesley Mofokeng

      Khanyi turned the character of superbitch, gold-digger and unapologetically attractive slut whom everyone loves to hate into a cult figure.

      While her exploits might be unattractive to many of her contemporaries, she typifies an era of societal transition. Her story might be better appreciated as a biography of a public figure who attracts fame and controversy in equal measure.

      Her character straddles the worlds of the township and of high-flying Johannesburg paparazzi. The broader context and the mood of the times are reflected in her life story. She is an enigmatic phenomenon in an enigmatic transitional period.

      She is Khanyi Mbau!

      – Noeleen Maholwana-Sangqu, host of 3Talk

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      Introduction

      I met Khanyi Mbau during her fame-drunk TV days on Muvhango. She seemed to glow. Her career pointed skyward, she was going places, and fascinated me right away. In my long career as an entertainment journalist, I’ve seen a cavalcade of young starlets come and ago, but none of them had that special something that grips you when you’re lucky enough to get near it. Khanyi had it.

      Who was she, I wondered, and could she last in the tiny, vicious world of local entertainment? How far would this brazen, acerbic 19 year old with the gummy smile and funny teeth go?

      At least she knew how to keep the media interested. Mbau was guilelessly unafraid to answer questions. In fact, she seemed to welcome them. She was hungry to be known and spoke too freely and showed a little too much. There was no glib PR filter with her. She immediately responded to questions dodged by most other celebrities.

      I once had this exchange with her in 2007:

      “Who is the one person, living or dead, you despise?”

      “Duma kaNdlovu,” she replied, without blinking.

      Duma, the creator of Muvhango. The man who had given Khanyi her big break. Mbau’s candour made my mouth go dry. It took me a while to pick my jaw up off the floor. She had just dissed the man whose show had given her a shot at fame and the big time. She was already behaving like a veteran diva who bowed down to no one. There was obviously bad blood between the two and Mbau was not afraid to tell us all about it. Her straightforwardness would be a big part of Brand Khanyi. It proved to be refreshing to tabloids and fans alike.

      Here was an early hint that Khanyi was going to flaunt her life in the media. She would fling open the doors to her bedroom for the cameras and spill her heart. Marrying a multimillionaire twice her age really got her noticed. Was it love, gold-digging or savvy brand building? Her husband, Mandla Mthembu, made millions after successfully suing Transnet over a botched tender. Their romance was made in tabloid heaven. They were both creatures of the glitzy new era of freedom for the lucky few.

      The marriage provided a steady stream of very public scandals, break-ups, make-ups, matching Lamborghinis and shopping sprees for the Sunday papers. It didn’t last. Mthembu ran out of money and the opulent fairy tale dream crumbled. Mbau had to leave her home in Michelangelo Towers and return to earth.

      Could Khanyi survive without a sugar daddy? Did she have the necessary drive and survival instincts to make her own way in a city as cruel and indifferent as Joburg? Mbau drifted for a while. She relied on the kindness and couches of her closest friends. It seemed like she had already peaked.

      Then she appeared in the news, her natural environment, with a black Lamborghini and a brand-new man in her life. Another multi-millionaire twice her age but married this time – an Afrikaner called Theunis Crous. To her fans, the affair made her seem reckless. It earned her the unflattering tag of home-wrecker.

      When that strange relationship imploded – another bad romance played out in the glare of the media – Mbau was ready. She had a plan for Brand Khanyi and she refused to lose her tabloid momentum or give up her place in the pantheon of local celebrity.

      The story of Khanyi Mbau parallels the new democracy in South Africa. It reflects the changing values of a generation of Born-frees, tired of the self-sacrifice of the struggle. Khanyi was only nine years old in 1994, when the first non-racial elections happened. She is the poster girl of conspicuous consumption. The self-proclaimed Queen of Bling is unashamedly selfish.

      For someone so beautiful, she can also be ugly. Mbau told Debora Patta, a TV presenter, that she would happily eat “croissants and blue cheese” in front of the starving masses. Why should she feel guilty about her own success? It’s a self-centered bravado shared by many up-and-coming young things enjoying opportunites their parents only dreamed about.

      Mbau is the unashamed product of the new South Africa. She is the originating gene of copycats who have nothing but their wiles and beauty with which to get ahead. She is the patron saint of any young woman new to the big city scanning the streets for a sugar daddy. But do they have her work ethic, her fervent self-belief? That’s what her fans are responding to beyond the surface glitz. They respect her will-power and her success.

      She has worked her way onto the front page, into the best night clubs, onto the richest estates. She has starred on television. It has taken smarts, guts and determination to make it to the top of the celebrity pile. Nobody can take that away from her. She has played the game and won. Mbau has more confidence in the tips of her bespoke Brazilian weave than the rest of us put together. The value of her press alone over the last few years can be equated to millions in ad spend. Brand Khanyi is real. She remains one of the most divisive and polarising celebrities in Mzansi. People instantly declare their love or hate for her, like this reader of Destiny magazine:

      “Women regard Khanyisile Mbau with disdain. We dislike her in an era when women are fighting for the place they deserve in society. Mbau reinforces the not-yet-abandoned notion that all women live for is finding a rich man who can look after them. Mbau’s out of favour because she acts as though the feminist movement never happened – as though feminism is a contemporary feminine myth. Mbau is hell-bent on losing our feminist war for us . . .”

      - Nomfundo Shezi, March 2011

      Is Khanyi Mbau a post-feminist, writing her own rules, or a throwback to the mindset of the 1950s when men were the providers? Does she even know who she is?

      Over the years, I’ve interviewed her many times and deluded myself that I’ve uncovered the real woman behind the media creature. But something else always comes up and I have to change the way I think and feel about her. She’s forever changing, but one thing is certain: at 26 she already has an extraordinary life story.

      There’s a lot to like about her. Khanyi can be touchingly honest, frank and open. It is moving to hear her remember herself as a little girl who grew up in middle-class comfort in Soweto. Her grandmother, a hard-working nurse, made sure she never wanted for anything. The house at 69B Mzoneli Street in Mofolo Village where she grew up, was

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