I cry!’ This baby will appear strong-willed and intense but will often be quite happy between feeds. If they are very windy and posit a lot, they may well respond well to treatment with homeopathic remedies like NausiCare or ColicCare.
Tips for Mom
•Despite your increased energy, take care not to overdo things. Continue to pace yourself through the day and night and rest every now and then through the day. Go easy on chores too.
•You might pass blood clots and suddenly bleed more today. If bleeding passes within a few hours and you have no pain or fever, there is no cause for concern. If you do not feel well or bleeding remains profuse, see your midwife or doctor as soon as possible.
•Ask your partner to take you out for tea at a baby-friendly restaurant and enjoy the admiring glances your baby is sure to attract.
•If you still feel weepy and as if you are not coping, call a private midwife, log onto the Sister Lilian Centre website for available services or call the Postnatal Depression Support Association. Sharing your feelings will help put things in perspective.
DAYS ELEVEN TO FOURTEEN
You’re not trying to be Superwoman yet, are you? In reality, you have probably never worked as hard as this in all your life. What you are doing might not always seem so impressive; rather humdrum chores like feeding, nappy changing, bathing your baby, winding . . . Remind yourself that those tasks are the framework for the very important work of caring for, moulding and raising the next generation. You can rightly be proud of that. Every single thing you do is preparing Baby for her future, and there can be no more important task than that.
About Baby
•Now that you are less anxious about handling Baby, it is time to reap some benefits. Lie down when breastfeeding so that you too can sleep, just as baby does. Once you have mastered this art, you will sleep more than you ever have, albeit not in one stretch. Check the milk-feeding section for details of this wonderful way to ease nursing.
Tips for Mom
•Take a slow stroll around the block today. Walking with your baby can be an enjoyable and very effective form of exercise to help regain your shape while providing Baby with comfort and entertainment. Build this into your routine and gradually increase the distance and tempo.
•Play soothing background music often for the enjoyment of both of you.
•Listening to talk radio or interesting interviews can also help you to feel part of the outside world again.
•Check your breasts in the mirror once or twice a day for any redness (usually vaguely triangular in shape) and palpate gently for any tender lumpy areas. Baby should drink from that side first or you can massage the area until soft.
•If you have a hair stylist friend, ask her to do your hair at home. This will be an instant pick-me-up. Ask a friend or relative to watch Baby.
Week Three to Week Six
Baby is now a beautifully communicative little being, with each week bringing new surprises, challenges, joys and concerns. Keep referring to this guide, and read more about any other concerns you might have or developments you are interested in, in the topic-specific sections.
WEEK THREE
Baby grasps your fingers tightly and can even be pulled into a sitting position. This reflex will gradually fade from about three months. Notice how Baby also has a fright reflex, throwing out his arms and scrunching up his face when startled. He can easily turn his head from side to side but still has difficulty holding it up without support.
Babies often have a growth spurt some time now. Just as you thought you knew Baby’s feeding routine, he might increase the number of feeds he needs for a few days. This is not because you have insufficient milk or because your milk is too weak. Simply take things more slowly again for the next few days and allow Baby to nurse more frequently to build up your milk supply. Feeding patterns will revert to normal in about three days. Formula babies also have growth spurts and should be offered more milk. It is probably better to give feeds more frequently rather than to increase the volume of existing feeds.
WEEK FOUR
Baby’s back is a little stronger and she is alert and curious. At the same time she really likes to be close to you. Use a supportive baby carrier pouch so that both hands are free to do your chores. Baby will hear and be comforted by your heartbeat, and your body warmth will ease any tummy aches. Do not carry Baby in this way all day but it can be a lifesaver for shopping trips, while doing chores and at fussy times. Notice how her hands become her first playthings, as she spends ages intertwining her fingers. Baby follows large objects to his midline and then loses interest in tracking them further.
If your baby has needed special care in a high-care unit, this might be your first week home as a complete family. These babies have often been exposed to constant light, sound and other stimuli, so will need time to adjust to a calmer, quieter environment at home. Tone things down gradually and embark on a regular, twice daily massage routine to help calm him. You might be physically recovered from the birth but you will feel quite new at caring for your baby without the presence of skilled staff to help when necessary. It would be good to have handled your baby extensively before she comes home, so talk to the staff about this. Read the sections applying to the first two weeks at home with a baby, as these tips will help you now too.
WEEK FIVE
Week Five won’t be very different from the previous week, except that everything might be a little more pronounced. Lopsided smiles will confirm that Baby is beginning to appreciate his environment. Soon she will begin gurgling when awake and not hungry.
Baby’s cries will be one of the things that concern you most. There are many reasons why babies cry. Most of them are not serious and require simple solutions to restore contentment. Crying is simply Baby’s first form of language: his way of communicating with you.
Do not rush to act preventatively at the first little sound a baby makes. A baby will often make a few sounds, moan a little, wriggle around and then settle of his own accord. Leave him for a while to see if he is really in need of something. This does not mean you should allow him to cry bitterly or for long periods, but simply that you should not automatically assume that something is wrong. When Baby cries, consider these possibilities before looking for more serious reasons:
•Is Baby’s nappy wet or dirty? Do check and change regularly.
•Is Baby thirsty or hungry? Feed when necessary, not according to a schedule.
•Is he too hot or cold? Remember that babies feel both cold and heat sooner than adults and you may need to remove or add a layer or two of clothing or blankets.
•Is she uncomfortable, maybe lying on one side only and experiencing pins and needles? Change her position from time to time if niggly.
•Is he tired and rubbing his ears or eyes? A walk, patting, rocking or singing will help him fall asleep.
•Is it late in the day when he is niggly, as almost all babies are? Go for a walk, bath him, or use a baby carrier as time-tested tips.
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