days, the personal “God word” will not surface. That is okay. In fact, if you try too hard to find it, it will only elude you more. Relax. Accept the absence when it occurs. It too is part of the formative process. True spiritual formation says, “God’s word, at God’s time, in God’s way.”
On most days, however, the reflection phase will yield some meaningful impression. It may be an idea or an emotion; it does not matter. It may emerge rather complete in itself, or it might appear quite unformed and fragmentary;
either way is all right. The time for recording is at hand, and this is the third step on your daily path in the workbook. One writer has called a journal or workbook a “blessing catcher.” That is the point of the reflection phase. It provides you the means to store the impression so that it is not lost. At a later time you can reflect further on the impression.
Some people record in prose, others in poetry. Still others will draw a picture or write out a personal conversation with God. Styles to record your impression are many. Use what works best for you. Be creative and experiment with new ways of recording. You may find along the way that you have some fresh ways to reflect and record your experiences with God. Recording is simply the phase in which the insights (the “God word”) are captured and considered.
The final phase is relating. It reminds us that we do not come to any moment with God empty-handed. We always have something worthwhile to share. The relating phase occurs in two ways in this workbook. First, each day’s exercises will lead you to relate what you have just experienced with some previous discovery. Think of it like adding links to a chain. Each day’s emphasis is part of a larger picture and progression. By relating your present discovery to your past experiences, you allow the Holy Spirit to unify and harmonize your spiritual growth. You allow God to set your experience in its proper, larger context of formation and maturation.
The second aspect of relating is the weekly group meeting. You do not have to form a group to use this workbook, but I hope you will. John Wesley called this “Christian Conference.” He believed God uses community and interaction to instruct us in ways that would not occur if we kept things to ourselves. At the end of each week, a guide for the group is suggested. Use it as a tool to help you, not as a tether to restrict you. Obviously, I have no way of knowing how God may have worked in your life or the lives of the group members. Honor what is happening in the group so that the dynamic presence of the Spirit is not lost. At the same time, do not discount the group guide. Some groups allow too much open discussion and the result is meandering, freewheeling, and domination by people who talk too much! Pay attention to the “How to Have a Good Group” section that follows.
By reading, reflecting, recording, and relating I believe you will find this seven-week process to be formative. It will be an occasion for positive spiritual training that will strengthen your desire and ability to approach all of life as devotional. This workbook will come alive when it enables you to make Wesley’s teachings a way of life more than a course of study. God bless you as you seek that above everything else!
How to Have a Good Group
Group experiences vary widely. Because they are a means of grace, we want to make them as positive and open to the Spirit as we can. The following guidelines are meant to help you do that. If you have not led or been part of a small group before, these guidelines are especially important. For all of us, however, they are valuable reminders of things that help groups go well.
First, take the attitude that you want to learn from others. None of us joins a group to impose our views or tastes on others. We come to contribute, to learn, and to grow. Mutual edification is a mark of healthy groups. A spirit of humility should characterize each member. We are all students in Christ’s school. We want to experience personal enrichment, and we want to sense that the group as a whole is growing.
Second, do not talk too much. No one person should dominate the discussion. Everyone should be encouraged to contribute ideas and experiences. There are no right comments and no experts in healthy groups. Rather, the Spirit inspires and informs through the totality of input. A good group is like a puzzle with each piece adding to the overall picture.
Third, be open to discussing any ideas. Vital groups open people’s minds and hearts. No one can completely predict what will become important for a group to explore. This does not mean that a group should chase random ideas all over the place, but it does mean that the group is open and respectful of anyone’s need to relate the group process to some significant aspect in his or her life. This may even include the raising of sensitive or controversial ideas. At such times, it is important to realize that you are not making decisions; you are just talking.
Fourth, do not tell long stories. If your personal study causes you to feel you have something important to contribute to the group when it meets, consider how to share it in a minute or two. People often come to groups excited to share something, but because they have not tempered that excitement, they get lost in their own stories. If the experience is important to share, it is important enough to think about, organize, and prepare to present.
Fifth, negotiate the leadership style for the group. This workbook is designed to allow every person to be a potential leader. The guidelines for weekly group meetings are specific and clear enough for anyone to follow. Nevertheless, no one should feel pressured to lead a group session. Talk openly about how you want to arrange weekly leadership. Your group may be comfortable with one person facilitating (not dominating or defining) the sessions. Or, the group may want shared or rotated leadership. Either way, the group must be clear about this early on so that you do not meet with a “who wants to start us off?” mentality. Someone should come to each group session prepared to launch the group and guide persons through the issues—issues that the workbook may suggest or ones that may emerge from the group dynamic.
Finally, be a good steward of time. Believe it or not, unbridled enthusiasm is deadly for group life. It may seem perfectly natural to exceed your time when things are really happening. But to evolve into a group that does not know when to quit is ultimately destructive. The old adage that it is better to end too soon than too late applies to healthy groups. It is better to leave a little hungry than to leave feeling stuffed!
There are more group dynamics than these, but the ones mentioned are essential qualities for a good group experience. These qualities should not be enforced as rules so much as integrated naturally into the atmosphere of weekly group meetings. By actually printing the guidelines in the workbook, every member can see and appreciate them. Leaders can be sensitive to see that they are being observed. Most of all, the Holy Spirit will work in and through vital groups. And as you will discover later on in the workbook, the Wesleyan concept of “Christian Conference” is a significant means of grace.
The Initial Group Meeting
Groups work best when they are formed by people who feel a common need to grow along mutually beneficial lines. You do not have to be well acquainted, but you do need to be unified in hope and purpose. Assuming you have at least one other person (and no more than eight) who shares a desire to use this workbook as a means of spiritual formation, the following ideas are provided to guide your first meeting.
The initial meeting is a time of orientation. Begin by handing out the workbook and browsing through it. You might want to read the introduction together as a means of centering the group. Allow every person to get comfortable with the material. Be alert for any hesitation or anxiety, and invite honest, open discussion about the process you are beginning. Do not dwell on the possibility that some may decide not to participate, but make it clear that any such decision is not interpreted as a lack of spirituality. It is natural to opt out of some things after knowing a little more about them. The initial group meeting may cause some to think, “This is not what I thought it was going to be; I am not sure I should commit to this.”
Explain that each week’s
