to stop being so damn touchy over everything. He should be grateful if Madeline had nothing else to say on the matter of him and Nee. She’d stuck her nose in enough with his brother’s relationship, and Daniel’s before that. Luke didn’t need her help, didn’t need anyone else’s help. He just needed to talk to Nee, clear the air and everything would be fine. He’d decided to forgive her, so there was nothing else to be said about it.
With a deep breath, he swallowed his temper and returned to Madeline’s side with the tools, and a pair of flowery gardening gloves he’d found on the shelf. ‘Thank you, darling. Hold these, will you?’ She nodded towards the limp stems.
Crouching beside her, Luke did his best to keep the shiny toes of his brogues from sinking into the wet soil of the flowerbed. He grasped the flowers where she indicated, holding them taut whilst Madeline snipped them short. She moved on to the next cluster, and he trailed at her heels, doing a damn good impression of Tigger. ‘I’ve decided to forgive her.’
‘That’s nice, dear.’ Madeline deadheaded a few more blooms, chucking the discards in the sack he held open for her. ‘What exactly are you forgiving her for?’
He frowned. What kind of game was she playing now? ‘For leaving me, of course.’
‘Of course.’ She moved to the other side of the bush, snipping as she went. ‘I thought you said you hadn’t spoken to her since the wedding.’
‘I haven’t.’ Luke huffed out a breath. ‘Look, Madeline, coy doesn’t suit you. Just spit it out, will you?’
Straightening up, she dropped another handful of beheaded flowers into the sack, then met his gaze. ‘If being coy doesn’t suit me, then being a fool suits you even less. It’s not much more than a month since you couldn’t bear to be in the same space as Nee. You’ve not spoken to her since, and yet you’re happy to forgive and forget?’
He ground his teeth. ‘I love her.’
‘And Richard loved me, but I still wanted to throttle him when he went behind my back and got a vasectomy. He did it for the best of reasons, and that just made it so much worse. I tried to swallow my resentment and anger with him, and it almost destroyed us.’
If a fly had chosen that moment to buzz over he’d probably have swallowed it, so low had his jaw dropped. There were few certainties he’d stake his life on: the sun rose in the East, Marmite was revolting, and Madeline and Richard had the happiest marriage in the world. To hear her speak of such things shook him to the core. ‘You always seem so happy together.’
‘And we are, darling, but things might have been different if I’d carried on trying to ignore the elephant in the corner.’ Madeline rested a hand on his chest. ‘Richard hurt me, whether he meant to or not. With the noblest of intentions or not, he hurt me. If I hadn’t found someone to talk to about it, I don’t know where we’d be. Certainly not as content as we are now.’
Her hand pressed hard over his heart for a couple of beats. ‘Nee hurt you. Whatever her reasons. And if you don’t acknowledge that, it’ll fester away and eventually poison everything.’ She lifted her hand, returned it to brush a few spots of dirt left behind by her gardening gloves, then smiled at him. ‘You mean the world to me, and I want more than anything for you all to be happy.’
A scratchy feeling rose in his throat, and Luke had to swallow around it. ‘I know, Mads.’ He shut his eyes briefly against the feelings her words stirred up. ‘I’m scared. Scared I won’t be able to cope with the truth. When I saw her, I knew I’d do anything to get her back and it made me so angry – at myself, not her. It just kept going round and round in my head, so I decided to ignore it instead.’ He laughed. ‘I’m an idiot.’
Madeline patted his arm. ‘We’ve all been fools for love, sweet boy. I’m always here and ready to listen, or I can recommend a service I’ve used in the past. I know Kiki benefited from their assistance recently.’
Had he agreed to talk to somebody then? He ran back through their conversation in his mind, but couldn’t pin down when his position on it had shifted, only that it had. The lid was off the box now, and if he tried to shove it back on without facing his fears, he would be doing both himself and Nee a disservice. If he truly wanted to try and make things work with her, he needed to be on completely solid ground, and the only way to achieve that would be to do as Madeline suggested. He just wasn’t sure if he could talk to her about the jumble of emotions inside him; nor did he feel comfortable with the idea of pouring his heart out to a total stranger.’
Whether his expression gave his hesitancy away, or whether she was just a bloody mind reader, Madeline offered him a sympathetic smile. ‘Maybe you could find someone a bit closer to home. I’m only suggesting you think about it, that’s all.’ Stripping off one of her gloves, Madeline dug into the pocket of her neat slacks and produced a neatly folded tissue. ‘Dry your eyes and let’s go and eat a couple of obscenely large slices of that gateau.’
Luke blotted his cheeks, unaware he’d been crying until she mentioned it.
‘Everything all right, Spud?’ Luke spun round to see Aaron watching them from a few feet away, a frown of concern etched between his brows. He recognised that look, knew Aaron was in full big-brother mode, ready to step in and fix whatever the problem was. Tigger scampered out from beneath a bush to crouch at his master’s feet, tail wagging. Keeping his eyes fixed on Luke, Aaron bent down to stroke the puppy’s head.
The tightness in Luke’s chest eased. He had his family and friends around him, and they would do everything within their power to help him and Nee. All he had to do was reach out to them, and make sure he did everything he could to help himself. Tucking the tissue away, he hooked his arm around Madeline’s shoulders and pulled her into his side. ‘Everything’s fine, Bumble, thanks to a certain meddling old bag.’
A sharp elbow dug him in the ribs. ‘That’s Fairy Godmother to you, cheeky bugger.’
‘Oof!’ Luke staggered away clutching his side as though she’d delivered a much harder blow, almost bumping into his brother in the process.
Aaron hooked an arm around his neck, tugging him into a half-hug, half-headlock. ‘You would tell me if there was something wrong, wouldn’t you?’
‘Yes, of course …’ He cut off the instinctive response and swallowed. ‘Actually, I could do with a chat later, if you have time?’
Shifting his hold, Aaron brushed a quick kiss on his cheek. ‘Always got time for you, Spud. You know that.’
Yes. He did.
When the end came, it was surprisingly quick. Nee had finally settled into a routine with her father only to be thrown into the bureaucratic nightmare brought on by Vivian’s death. Even for someone with little in the way of personal assets, the world seemed determined to thwart them at every turn. George battled valiantly with solicitors, banks and all the other institutions who demanded a ridiculous amount of detail before they would accede to close accounts and update their records. Nee said a silent prayer of thanks for his meticulous record-keeping as she did her best to relieve him of as much of it as she could. An air of eerie acceptance had settled over her dad. True, he’d never been the most demonstrative of men, but his preternatural calm worried her more than if he’d broken down in tears.
Arrangements for the
